Taking someone else’s baby name

What’s to feel guilty about? Genuinely confused about this. It’s not stealing a name. Otherwise everyone everywhere has stollen their baby names from someone else. Who cares?
it’s different if it’s a family member, but it’s not and you barely even know her. It has literally no baring on hers or her sons life if your son happens to have the same name

My sisters best friend named her son the same as mine. It's really no big deal. Unless it's super unusual you will always have someone with the same name. Go for it, I'm sure she won't be bothered.

Honestly usually I’d say if your not friends it’s fine HOWEVER I had the same exchange but reversed, so,

a mum at the school I never ever speak to came over when I had given birth to my son as everyone does. Asked his name, I told her…. She said how lovely it was and how you don’t hear nowadays (family name)…Fast forward a couple of months….she has her new baby, so I approach with all the usual niceties and another mum asked the name! she literally stared at me shell shocked and said my sons name!! She knew it was weird you could tell from the look on her face.

what’s more is I’m extremely laid back and I can’t stress this enough I really thought this wouldn’t bother me in the slightest, but admittedly it really did annoy me and everyone who I’ve mentioned it to has been gobsmacked.

so I suppose it depends if you think your likely to engage with her when baby is here as people love to have a nose at new bundle of joy, then she well have the same feelings as I did

The rather dated and mild insult is 'big Jessie'. Jesse is a much older name than that. I assume Jessie comes from calling a man by a girl's name because he has done something 'soft'. We're past that now and I haven't heard it in years, plus only ever humourously. I don't think It's a big thing.

Sunnyflow, according to the dictionary it means an effeminate cowardly boy or man. Would you want to lump that on your son. I do know a woman called Jesse

My son was in a year group of around 45 children. There were three people with his name, and two girls with the same uncommon name. Don’t worry about it.

If you were over 60, you would realise it's an insult, meaning a cowardly person.

Even under 60, the big Jesse is an insult

It's fine.

Hahaha. Great show and great name! @mondray If you love the name then use it. Nobody owns a name and it's hardly the name a close friend or sibling has used.

Good luck with the birth!

It's totally fine. No one owns a name and it's completely normal for there to be multiple kids with the same names in any school class. In my DCs class of 30 there were only 20 different names because of duplications - some of which their mums must have thought were unusual when their baby was born but they were part of a surge in popularity for that name.

You're overthinking it. I've been in the same situation. Pregnant with a boy so we 'banked' the girls name for the future. A colleague had liked it so much that a year later, when we were in different departments, she had a baby girl and named it that banked girls name.

We still used the girls name for pregnancy no3 and, having boy girl twins, found a boys name we liked.

Imagine our amusement when we bumped into each other a while later. Me with toddler twins, her with same name daughter and a newborn. Who shared the same name as our twin son.

Her son and daughter had by pure coincidence the same names as our twins. We laughed, caught up with each other and went on with our lives.

There will always be someone somewhere in your child's life who has the same or a similar name. Unless you saddle your child with a completely made up name, it's unlikely they'll ever be unique so use the name that is loved. Especially when you can connect it to something else you/dh enjoys.

When I was at school there were 6 Laurens and about 8 Christopher's, it's really a non-issue. DD has 5 children in her year with the same name as her but different spellings it's not uncommon.

Is your last name James! If you were over 60, you would realise it's an insult, meaning a cowardly person.

I thought of the actor in Neighbours and House.

Not sure I've come across a Jesse in real life.

Do not ask or warn!

As they say it’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission and you don’t even need either!

Too much overthinking here. Use the name. It doesn’t matter one jot that there may be others with the same name when they get to school. Neither does it matter that a conversation you had with an acquaintance from school led to you choosing it.
I have four children in different classes and in every one there is at least one girl or boy that shares a name with their classmates

I think you should get ahead of the awkwardness so it doesn't run into stress over your baby, worrying when you tell anyone at the school the name etc.

On Monday, find the mum, chat a bit about how it's C-section tomorrow. Then say that you actually wanted to talk to her - your DH has an absolute favourite name, loved Jesse since breaking bad but you are worried she'll mind if you use it too, will it be weird if they are at school together etc.

I think if she reassures you now, it'll be a nicer few weeks and easier time for you all.

Good luck on Tuesday.

No one owns a name.

It's good for kids to have one or two people in their svhool with the same name. It helps then identify with their peers.
Your friend will thank you in her mind

I assume you're being ironic

I hated being one of several in my school and was envious of the girls with beautiful memorable names!

Could always go for Walter instead 🤣 or Saul!

Jesse is lovely… it’s not up to her and no big deal.

when you see her post having your baby, you don’t have to admit the name was from her.

with two classes in a year group, you might not be in the same class, there may be another little Jesse as well!

Gilmore Girls?

I'd use it. I wouldn't not use a name because a vague acquaintance also used it.
Unless you have a specific wish for your child to not have children with the same name as them in the class I guess - I know that's something some people aim for.

Use it! You'll have your son all your life and this other person could move away tomorrow only to be replaced by another person with the same name (not that they'd have any right to be annoyed anyway). :)

As an alternative, how about Walter, Hank or Gustavo?

@user1492757084 eh?!