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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Name regret

34 replies

Emz555 · 13/08/2023 09:31

Please no judgement, this is a hard post to write.

I gave birth to my second daughter 7 months ago. Pregnancy was unplanned and her dad and I separated as he didn't want me to keep her. I struggled throughout but also had my 8 month old to care for and returned to work full time.

Her birth was traumatic and ended in an emergency section. Dad then decided he did want to be involved and he'd made a mistake. I was an emotional mess and under daily pressure to name her. I originally agreed to Mila Eve, because I didn't dislike it and everyone else seemed to love it. I didn't register her until the deadline and about a week prior decided Mila wasn't right, so went with Eve Celine without telling anyone. I was still (and still am) living alone with both my babies and had no one I wanted to talk to anyway. Eve or Eva had always been special to me so Eve kind of felt right. I'm 7 months in, we've finally just moved into our new hoke and I think I'm starting to process the whole past year. I'm still struggling with her name. I'm not sure I'm comfortable with it, everyone laughs or thinks I'm joking when they ask her middle name. My other choice was either Eva or Camille. I don't feel I can change her first name again without people thinking I've totally lost the plot. Do you think it's OK to call her Eva and just keep Eve on her birth cert? What, if anything, can be done about her middle name do you think? I likely won't tell a soul if changes are made I just want and need to feel better bonded to her and because I feel I've messed up her name I don't feel that way.

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TennisWithDeborah · 13/08/2023 11:30

I think that Eve Celine is a gorgeous, classy name and I really like the nod to your late grandmother.

But it doesn’t matter what I think about the name because it doesn’t belong to me, nor to my DD. You must do what you feel is right.

I do wonder whether you have PND and are still struggling with what you’ve been through with your little girl’s dad and your grandmother. Maybe a chat with your GP or practice nurse is in order?

Summer2424 · 13/08/2023 11:25

Hi @Emz555
I'm so sorry you've had to go through everything alone. I love the name Eve Celine, as soon as i saw it i thought wow what a beautiful name. I don't see a problem with calling her Eva even if it's Eve on her birth certificate. Alot of of my friends are called by different names, me included, my name is long and people have trouble pronouncing it so i just shortened it and everyone calls me by that name. Well done for bringing up your DD on your own i know how hard it can be xx

WunWun · 13/08/2023 11:15

Just change it now while she's young, otherwise you'll always regret it.

MorningOclock · 13/08/2023 11:12

Emz555 · 13/08/2023 09:43

I still regret not using Camille somewhere in her name. I went with Celjne because it means heaven, and my nan who I wasn't close to passed away whilst I was pregnant so I used it more for my mum, but to disappear honest I don't think she appreciated the significance anyway x

Why don’t you start calling her Eva Camille and if you feel much happier with the name, start changing it on the birth certificate etc.

Busted2006 · 13/08/2023 10:44

Change it, change it, change it.

If you want Eva, change it to Eva. Its not a big change.

Do not spend your life disliking your DDs name.

I'd also change the middle name if I wasn't happy.

No judgement her. Do what you feel is right.

DuchessOfSausage · 13/08/2023 10:32

You can change a baby's name on the birth certificate up to 12 months after the birth.
It's probably all the other stuff that is making you fixate on the name, and I'd go and have a chat with the GP to rule out post-natal depression or depression caused by grief.

Sorry to hear about your nan.

Weefreetiffany · 13/08/2023 09:48

I think you sound like you have a lot of worry and sadness from this recent tough time. Understandably so, it sounds like a lot for anyone to bear. Could you be feeling unsure about the name as a way to try and take control while having gone through this stressful period. It’s not really about the name but about you. All those names are lovely and significant to you. Focus on making yourself feel better, congratulations both on your daughter and having survived such a tough experience 💐

Original poster
Emz555 · 13/08/2023 09:43

I still regret not using Camille somewhere in her name. I went with Celjne because it means heaven, and my nan who I wasn't close to passed away whilst I was pregnant so I used it more for my mum, but to disappear honest I don't think she appreciated the significance anyway x

OP posts:
MorningOclock · 13/08/2023 09:36

Do you have a first and middle name that you feel very sure on now? Honestly, don’t worry about what other people think - you’ve given it 7 months and you’re still not sold on the name, she is little and you can change it to something you love