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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

We want our names as middle name for baby, but my name is awful.

214 replies

Mapricot · 22/05/2023 13:54

We finally agreed on a name for our future daughter. We let go of the parents/relatives names. And I am happy about it. His name's girl version is beautiful but mine is awful. I don't even tell people, I use my middle name.

I was thinking maybe we could use an alternative. Do you know any name that sounds like Karen ? I was thinking of Kerry. But I'd love to hear about more options.

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NetballHoop · 22/05/2023 14:43

How about Carmen?

Heronwatcher · 22/05/2023 14:42

I like Kara. Or Wrenn (phonetic ending of Karen).

But I sort of agree that you should just choose a name you like. Won’t whatever you choose remind you of Karen anyway? I adored my gran but no way would I have saddled my DD with either of her bloody awful names!

saveforthat · 22/05/2023 14:42

Did you start using your middle name when Karen became an insult or have you always hated it? If the former, I think that's really sad. I know quite a few people called Karen and I only knew it was an insult because of MN. Never heard it used as an insult in real life. Anyway call your daughter whatever you want.

Suddenlysummer · 22/05/2023 14:37

Keren?

Scoobyblue · 22/05/2023 14:36

Use your middle name. Tell your husband to bog off

Twazique · 22/05/2023 14:34

Aerin
Erin

FriedEggChocolate · 22/05/2023 14:33

Are you married OP? Could you use your maiden name? Karen is a diminutive of Katherine, apparently, and means Pure if you can find another girl's name with a similar meaning. Or just invert it and use Nera.

Rightnowstraightaway · 22/05/2023 14:32

I know a baby Keren. I also like Karen actually and never use it pejoratively because I think it's offensive.

But if you don't like it and would rather use your middle name, do it. My dc has two middle names, one chosen by me and one by DH. We would only have vetoed something truly heinous, I think only one person has asked about middle names since the birth announcement.

MmaRra · 22/05/2023 14:31

Mapricot · 22/05/2023 13:59

Because we were thinking by the age she is an adult maybe it would have stopped being an insult. Tbh I'd prefer my middle name husband INSISTS so much

Show quote history

Tell him to stop INSISTING and start LISTENING. He needs to respect the wishes of the baby's mother/his wife and compromise. Use your middle name if that is what you are known as. It has become your name, not the name you don't like and don't use.

Treasureboxkey · 22/05/2023 14:31

Mapricot · 22/05/2023 13:59

Because we were thinking by the age she is an adult maybe it would have stopped being an insult. Tbh I'd prefer my middle name husband INSISTS so much

Show quote history

He doesn't get to insist. It's your bloody name and if you don't like it then don't use it.
The idea if naming a child after someone is meant to be as a tribute, a loving act. Forcing you to name your child something that you hate and that will cause you guilt because it is linked to you is far from lovinf.
If you don't want you use your name then you don't have to. You should be able to choose a name that you love if it is meant to be a tribute to you.
Do you have a favourite
Flower
Bird
Place
Gemstone etc that could be used as a middle name?
Or is their just another name that you would rather give to her?

watcherintherye · 22/05/2023 14:24

But you could use Karenza? It's a variation on the Cornish word for love (kerensa).

Or just Keren, like Keren Woodward of Bananarama!

Moomoo36 · 22/05/2023 14:24

I knew a little girl called Carin and always thought it was nice. Tbh everyone thought her name was Karen though because it does sound so similar.

PoolSafety · 22/05/2023 14:23

Karin

Topazbutterfly · 22/05/2023 14:20

Names I think sound a bit similar to Karen are Kristen, Carrie, Kayla and Kathryn. I do think Kerry is a lovely choice though and I don't think a there's anything wrong with Karen but obviously if you don't like it, I understand not wanting to use it. Although she might like it when she's older cause it is your name.

WilkinsonM · 22/05/2023 14:20

Most people don't give their kids two middle names or name them after the parents so why is your husband insisting on this bizarre thing that you don't want to do?

GiveOverRover · 22/05/2023 14:18

Your husband INSISTS that you call your child your name, which you hate?

Making no sense. Pick another.

LadyVictoriaSponge · 22/05/2023 14:16

Any variant of the name Karen would be ridiculous, it’s not your name! Either give your child your name that you hate (again, ridiculous) or you know, pick an actual name you like for your child.

Outdamnspot23 · 22/05/2023 14:13

I think your husband can shut up about insisting when you both get a say.

But you could use Karenza? It's a variation on the Cornish word for love (kerensa).

SBHon · 22/05/2023 14:12

Your husband is insisting you don’t use the name you are actually known by (your middle name) and yet is happy for you to swap to a name that isn’t your first name at all and not linked in any way (ie Kerry)?

Your husband needs to learn to compromise. You need to learn to ‘insist’.

Luredbyapomegranate · 22/05/2023 14:12

QforCucumber · 22/05/2023 14:02

I went to school with a Karina? (pronounced Car ee nah) would that work?

That’s a good idea -

andifeelfine · 22/05/2023 14:11

You can't always control what you pass on.

But you can control this. Why give a child a name that has negative connotations for you? If you don't love it, don't pass it on. Pick something new - give the child a clean slate, free of the burden of trying to repurpose a name you hate into a more positive one.

Luredbyapomegranate · 22/05/2023 14:11

Karen is a great deal nicer than Kerry!

It’s a nice name actually, and it’s image problem will probably have gone, so personally I’d use it.

However it’s the Danish version of Katherine, so any version of that - Caitlin, Catrin, Katrina, Katharina might work. Or Kay, which is a short form of either name.

LetItGoHome · 22/05/2023 14:10

How bazaar, calling a child a name you hate. Not even dislike or a bit meh about. But hate! Don't do it. Tell your husband no and find a name you both like.

KirstenBlest · 22/05/2023 14:10

Are you sure it's going to be a girl? What if she arrives and is a boy? Would you use the same pattern for middle names?

KirstenBlest · 22/05/2023 14:08

** names are examples only, I'm not suggesting those actual names. Apricot is rather nice though