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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

3 weeks to go and SIL used our name

62 replies

Trezelma · 09/05/2023 19:46

just that really, expecting DD1 I have always been open about using a sentimental family name for future DD.. SIL was aware as she knows it is a family name
SIL did not know the gender of her baby, baby arrived early hours this morning and announced baby’s name which is a variation of the name I have picked (think Elle / Ella) not the actual names but that’s how similar they are..

what would you do?

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Confusion101 · 11/05/2023 16:38

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 11/05/2023 16:28

Fair. I still find it interesting.

The child has 2 parents, and yet...

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Very true! 🙈

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 11/05/2023 16:28

Confusion101 · 11/05/2023 14:24

It could be husbands sister 🤔

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Fair. I still find it interesting.

The child has 2 parents, and yet...

SkaneTos · 11/05/2023 15:37

CoronationKicking · 09/05/2023 19:50

Aw cute, Ellie and Ella. We've got such similar taste!

I agree with this.
Use the name you have decided on anyway. I also think it's quite common for cousins to have similar names or the same name.

Confusion101 · 11/05/2023 14:24

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 11/05/2023 08:37

Interesting title. Sister in law... why not my brother used our babyname?

Anyhow. Use the name you want. You can still use the name you initially chose.

It could be husbands sister 🤔

PumpkinsAndCoconuts · 11/05/2023 08:37

Interesting title. Sister in law... why not my brother used our babyname?

Anyhow. Use the name you want. You can still use the name you initially chose.

gerispringer · 11/05/2023 06:16

If it’s a popular / fashionable name then every other girl in the class will have it. I’d prefer a more unusual name personally.

user1492757084 · 11/05/2023 05:53

Use the name.
Cousins often have names based on a particular family name.

Zwicky · 10/05/2023 23:29

My family has far more people than names, especially amongst the boys. It’s not at all unusual for cousins to share a name. I don’t think it’s odd or annoying at all. It’s not on my radar as an adult and I thought it was special as a kid.

scrivette · 10/05/2023 23:23

Use it still.
My brother and cousin have the same name and there is a step cousin by the same to too, it's never been an issue.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 10/05/2023 23:18

I'd find a different name especially if same surname. Maybe use it as middle name instead.

MetalFences · 10/05/2023 15:06

we have cousins with the same and similar names just from my side and Dh’s side and it is very annoying.

Yes, definitely choose a name you don't want for your child just in case some cousins of yours find it annoying. 🙄

spudulike1 · 10/05/2023 14:49

I knew a family that had cousins named Isabella and Bella, born very close together. I also found out when i had my eldest and called her after my grandmother that if my cousin had had a girl she would have used it first (same gran), it wouldnt have stopped me using it.

Ponderingwindow · 10/05/2023 14:00

I would pick a different name. It’s first come first served on names. You can’t hold one in reserve. It’s best not to announce your plans as it can inspire other people

we have cousins with the same and similar names just from my side and Dh’s side and it is very annoying.

Pollywoddles · 10/05/2023 13:57

Use it! She only used a variation and even if she hadn’t still, use it!

My brother and our cousin have the same family name and both their daughters have the same name. It’s not a big deal.

tikkanaan · 10/05/2023 13:56

Tiddlypomtiddlypom · 09/05/2023 22:08

Use your name. As you’d said, you’ve been open about it.

expecting DD1 I have always been open about using a sentimental family name for future DD.. SIL was aware as she knows it is a family name

If she says anything, laugh at her and say “I’ve always talked about using my family name for my daughter. You knew that. Sorry you chose something so similar, but nevermind. It was your choice.”

And then move on. Your child can have her name as planned.

This. If she gets up set you just say you told her it's what you were going to use and she made her choice so 🤷

Greentrees2021 · 10/05/2023 13:54

HeyDemonsItsYaGirl · 10/05/2023 10:43

Greentrees2021 Why would she be upset at being given a sentimental family name?

I'm not saying she will and it seems the OP has disappeared anyway. Just I'd hate for someone in my family to "honour" me by all falling out over who will use my name! Honouring someone is a lovely idea but not at the expense of a family fallout over who is using the name!

HeyDemonsItsYaGirl · 10/05/2023 10:43

Greentrees2021 Why would she be upset at being given a sentimental family name?

GoldenGorilla · 10/05/2023 10:41

I have 3 family members with the exact same first name. Not unusual at all in many cultures. It’s fine. I’d respond just nicely congratulating them and saying how lovely they’ve chosen a similar name to the one you’d picked out, the cousins will love having similar names.

KeepSmiling89 · 10/05/2023 10:38

Just name your child what you want to. Nothing wrong with similar names in families - there are families who give their children names with the same first letter.
We've got a Clare, Carla and Clara in our family (not siblings!) and it's no bother at all.

Skybluepinky · 10/05/2023 10:34

Use the name u like.

Kisskiss · 09/05/2023 23:10

Use the name.
ps if it’s isabelle/Isabella, definitely use it as they are beautiful names!

savoycabbage · 09/05/2023 22:15

Definitely use it. I've got the same name as my cousin and it's never been even slightly strange.

Our mothers were pregnant at the same time, I was born first and my auntie said that they had been going to call their baby the same name and my mother said that they still should.

motherofcontracts · 09/05/2023 22:13

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ as requested by the OP.

determinedtomakethiswork · 09/05/2023 22:13

Just use the name and remind her that that was going to be your name anyway.

Luredbyapomegranate · 09/05/2023 22:12

It’s not your name.

Use it if you want. It’s not unusual for cousins to have similar names.