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Baby names

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Original poster

Annoyed that my sister named her baby after my father

365 replies

Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:02

Hello everyone. I have already posted on reddit and people were in majority saying that I was an assh*le. So I thought my not ask mothers/future mothers or fathers what they think rather than a bunch of adolescents.

I am pregnant, due July the 14 with a little girl that I was planning on naming him after my father. My sister was also pregnant and gave birth on the 4th of April to a gorgeous girl she named after my father ( Think Daniel/Danielle , Alexander/Alexandra). I am happy for her but I am so annoyed.

He is not her father, but mine. Our mum met my dad when my sister was 2 , they got married and had me 8 years later.
She has a father, he didn't abandon her. She is in good terms with her and our mother and even goes play golf with my father.

So why name your baby after my father? It is his first grandchild. I wanted it to be special for him.

Should I say something or just move on?

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Tookeffort81 · 28/04/2023 17:20

I will take a punt op that your mother has no problem with this whatsoever and thinks it is lovely

adriftabroad · 28/04/2023 17:20

Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:16

She is not my stepsister, she is my sister, well half-sister. We share a mother. To be honest, her and I lived in different world. By the time I was 10, she was already 20 and gone.

Show quote history

apologies, I meant half sister.

She has known him longer than you. He WAS her father, she lived with him from 2? Dhe can honour him as she likes.

ComeTheFuckOnBridgett · 28/04/2023 17:19

Maybe she just liked the name and it's not thing to do with your dad. And even if it was after your dad, he's been there for her long enough.

How old are you??? You're acting like a teenager.

SylvanianFrenemies · 28/04/2023 17:19

Why not name one of your first 2 kids after him if this is so important?

Itsaboutdamntime899 · 28/04/2023 17:19

Wow, grow up. A father isn't someone who has to be blood related

Anaemiafog · 28/04/2023 17:18

Agree with reddit. Your child is not his first grandchild. Family is about more than DNA. I have no half or step siblings but one of my brothers has two (ex) step daughters. He was married to their DM for several years when they were young. He continied to act in a fatherly role despite them having a father.
These two women are our family. The eldest named her twin son after my brother and we all thought it was a wonderful gesture, demonstrating their love for one another. You sound so callous.

ComeTheFuckOnBridgett · 28/04/2023 17:18

SirChenjins · 28/04/2023 17:17

Why can't you name your DD after your mum?

That would be too easy. She probably would have found fault with any family name her sister chose.

Original poster
Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:17

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 28/04/2023 17:16

But…

…she’s known him longer.

I don’t understand the issue.

And? He is not her father. She has known our mother longer too, doesn't make me any less of my mum's child. She has a father, who took care of her.

OP posts:
SirChenjins · 28/04/2023 17:17

Why can't you name your DD after your mum?

Original poster
Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:16

adriftabroad · 28/04/2023 17:12

I bet you were a fabulous stepsister.
Either way, she has known him longer than you.

She is not my stepsister, she is my sister, well half-sister. We share a mother. To be honest, her and I lived in different world. By the time I was 10, she was already 20 and gone.

OP posts:
TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 28/04/2023 17:16

But…

…she’s known him longer.

I don’t understand the issue.

Seesawmarjorydaw · 28/04/2023 17:15

My husband has two cousins both names after their grandad. They use different diminutives (think Robbie/Bob) and only see each other every ten years or so.

it’s fine. You don’t own a name.

SeulementUneFois · 28/04/2023 17:15

I agree with you OP.
Was she jealous of you when you were born? Is she trying to "claim" your father as hers maybe - although she already had her involved father? What were/are the dynamics while you were growing up? (And now)

ComeTheFuckOnBridgett · 28/04/2023 17:14

Get over yourself. You sound very jealous for no reason.

What would you say? "I don't like that you've chose a similar name to my dads can you change it?"

She can call her kids whatever she fancies.

gamerchick · 28/04/2023 17:14

Just use it as a middle name maybe, she was there first,. Sorry man.

Greentree1 · 28/04/2023 17:13

You could use the same name. My GM and her two sisters all named their daughters the same (three daughters each, three names), made the family tree a nightmare but why not if that's the name you want to use? Or is there another female equivalent to the male name, but also why not name your daughter after your mother? If you have a son later you can name him after your father.

JassyRadlett · 28/04/2023 17:13

This isn't as big a deal as you think it is, really.

I have two siblings. Each of us has named one of our kids after my dad (either his name or the feminine version) as either a first or middle name. Two of those are first names.

It is 100% not an issue apart from the ego on my dad now 😂

Also makes for some fun Christmas morning shenanigans with grandad briefly pretending to nick half the presents as they've got his name on. The children are very kind about how silly and thick Grandad is.

toothbrusher · 28/04/2023 17:12

Team Reddit

adriftabroad · 28/04/2023 17:12

I bet you were a fabulous stepsister.
Either way, she has known him longer than you.

Tookeffort81 · 28/04/2023 17:11

Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:08

I am not planning on changing her name. I just want to ask her so bad why?

Come again?

MagicSpring · 28/04/2023 17:11

I think that's a lovely gesture on your sister's part (though possibly a little wounding to her birth father, so I hope she's thought about that).

I can see that you wouldn't necessarily want cousins with the same first name, or else yours will be 'Little Charlotte' to her cousin 'Big Charlotte'. I was similarly mildly miffed by my brother using a family name for his daughter, weeks before I'd planned on it for mine. Oh well. Time to find another name.

SirChenjins · 28/04/2023 17:11

Did you discuss this beforehand with her?

Can you use your mum's name - I presume it's her first grandchild too? Or use another version of your father's name - no-one owns a name which means you can use it too, or another version, if you want.

Tookeffort81 · 28/04/2023 17:10

Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:10

Her father is not absent, he took care of her.

Show quote history

Irrelevant

leave this poor woman alone

IWantRebeccasConfidence · 28/04/2023 17:10

It really depends on if she knew your plans or not. Why is her child not the first grandchild? It doesn’t make any second child and less special if they’re not the first. It sounds quite strange the way you talk about your father in some ways.

Original poster
Maxinemumof2 · 28/04/2023 17:10

Overthebow · 28/04/2023 17:07

So he’s been in her life since she was 2, bringing her up with her mum? I would definitely count her baby as his grandchild. Why wouldn’t she name her after him if she wants?

Her father is not absent, he took care of her.

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