Hyphenated surnames

SpinningFloppa · 2023-03-14T17:42:51+00:00

Not baby names sorry but didn’t know where else to post, does anyone know how you go about legally adding a hyphen to a surname?

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Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 16/03/2023 20:09

BlueSpark · 16/03/2023 20:03

Can you buddy up with admin at the doctors and get them to put the hyphen? Say you've noticed it's missing?

I’m actually going to try that that’s a good idea thanks
I was surprised when he said it. I said no it’s Sophie Smith which was met with a raised eyebrow!

OP posts:

BlueSpark · 16/03/2023 20:04

P.s that's a bit of a shit thing to do "so Sophie jones" - why are people so rude.

BlueSpark · 16/03/2023 20:03

Can you buddy up with admin at the doctors and get them to put the hyphen? Say you've noticed it's missing?

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 16/03/2023 19:53

Thank you both, my surname is a common man’s first name think along the lines of David, Richard etc. So whilst it could be a name it would be odd to put it as dds middle name.

By system I mean government/ medical (dd has a disability so we deal with a lot of medical appointments) I had a paediatrician appointment for her a few months back and the paediatrician read her full name out say it was Sophie Elizabeth Smith Jones (not real name) and then went “so Sophie Jones” 🙄 that’s the kind of thing that’s happening, yes I can correct people but it’s correcting people every single time and soon gets annoying. If I add a hyphen when I write it it won’t change the system and taking her BC down would be pointless as there is no hyphen on it 🤔 school have been fine with having her known as my name but other places won’t. I tried with the drs to have her known under mine and they said not without a deed poll, but they don’t mind her being known as just his!

OP posts:

BlueSpark · 16/03/2023 19:42

Can you ask them to amend the system? Which system are you referring to - the government or say a school system? If the school, push for it. Start adding a hyphen on all documents from here on in.

I go by the first surname and DD goes by the last surname and we don't have a hyphen. We share one and the other is different. (If that doesn't make sense think smith jones and smith Patel - I use smith and she Patel, not actual names) I must say one of my banks does use my last one but it's clearly documented. I think they just pick one and hope for the best.

Is your surname one that could be a middle or first name?

To sum up, I don't think you need to do anything official. Just start adding a - on everything from here on in.

ZoyaTheDestroyer · 16/03/2023 16:45

I think part of the reason why I have never had this problem is because neither part of my surname is used as a given name. You might already do this but when I was living in France I got into the habit of always writing my name as Firstname SURNAME SURNAME, so for example Ava MADISON HARRIS. It is the convention throughout much of Europe and it does make things so much clearer. I wish it were more commonly used in the UK.

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 16/03/2023 13:58

And have also said it never happens to them 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m now aware without the hyphen mine reads as a surname I was young when I had dd so had no experience of this hence why asking advice at the time but she said to put mine first, that’s why I’m asking about adding a hyphen but people on this thread have doubt that this happens even though it happens literally every time. No one uses mine.

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Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 16/03/2023 13:56

Of course I’m Aware but there are people on this thread who are not understanding it so I’m explaining it to them. People on this thread have said they don’t understand why this would happen.

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DuchessOfSausage · 16/03/2023 13:53

That's the usual way surnames work in the UK, @SpinningFloppa .
How would someone know that Ava Madison Harris and Noah Lewis Smith were Ms Madison Harris no hyphen and Mr Lewis Smith no hyphen?
You can add a hyphen, without doing it officially, but people will tend to use the last name only.
I can remember there being some kids at school with me who had double barrelled surnames, but unless the first and last name were very common, the first of the double-barrelled surname was used.

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 16/03/2023 07:51

The fact that mine was first I assumed it would come under mine alphabetically but apparently not 🤔

OP posts:

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 16/03/2023 07:45

BlueSpark · 16/03/2023 05:58

Adding a line to the birth certificate won't mean people suddenly use both. People use what you tell them to. If it's just yours, would that be better? If so, tell them. I have two surnames with no hyphen and so does DD. We both choose to use just one (different ones to the other to mix it up) and no one gets it wrong. We have friends and they use both and both get used.

Kick up a fuss! Surnames are no different to first names and if you're name was Samantha but you were called Jane by everyone you would correct them.

Trouble is it's already on "the system" now and people are reading mine as a middle name because there is no hyphen so written down mine appears as the middle name, I correct people f2f but it's tiresome and all letters are written to his surname so it's harder to correct that. I wouldn't mind people using both and not just mine it's that they are not even using both, purely just his. Without the hyphen written down people see it as a middle name. When I gave the pharmacist my name she couldn't find dds prescription but when I gav e her full name she could find it, then when she called out the name she only called his. That's the type of thing that happening.

OP posts:

BlueSpark · 16/03/2023 05:58

Adding a line to the birth certificate won't mean people suddenly use both. People use what you tell them to. If it's just yours, would that be better? If so, tell them. I have two surnames with no hyphen and so does DD. We both choose to use just one (different ones to the other to mix it up) and no one gets it wrong. We have friends and they use both and both get used.

Kick up a fuss! Surnames are no different to first names and if you're name was Samantha but you were called Jane by everyone you would correct them.

Luredbyapomegranate · 15/03/2023 20:32

I would just add a hyphen from now on. I don’t think anyone will even notice.

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 15/03/2023 09:57

Thanks all. It’s not a double surname as I’ve actually never had anyone use both it’s only always his. I know some people think I should “let it go” but I don’t see why I should, I gave her two surnames not one. If it was my mistake and I had only given her fathers name then was annoyed I hadn’t used mine fair enough I would let that go but I didn’t I gave her both and assumed people would use both not just his. I will try again with the gp and physically go down there with the bc.

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Mummyoflittledragon · 15/03/2023 05:57

We are hyphenated. Doesn’t stop some people from calling dh by my surname as we put it last. He used to get annoyed , ironically if I only bother to give the one name. I give his as it comes first.

user1492757084 · 15/03/2023 05:39

I agree with checking the data bases and correcting them.

A double surname is easier and nicer than the same names with a hyphen. You can show the Birth Certificate whenever needed to have correct name entered.

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 14/03/2023 21:08

ZoyaTheDestroyer · 14/03/2023 20:59

It is very likely her name has been entered incorrectly into a central database. The next time you have an in-person appointment ask the receptionist to check her patient record. Have her birth certificate or passport with you and ask them to correct the record. It will be a bit of a hassle but much less than going to court

You might have to live with the prescriptions, however. There are usually a limited number of characters that fit on the label and it just cuts it off. My son’s medical notes as a newborn all had him down as Baby Smith Jo rather than Smith Jones.

Thank you I will do that next time I’m down there.

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Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 14/03/2023 21:07

Twoinapod · 14/03/2023 20:58

@SpinningFloppa even with a hyphen that will still happen a lot. A lot of the time computer systems will only have so much space so will only use one name. It really isn’t a big deal, try to let it go

I won’t be letting it go she is known as my surname everywhere else and doesn’t know his name I wouldn’t have given her both if I wanted mine dropped. I didn’t give her just my exes 🤷‍♀️

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ZoyaTheDestroyer · 14/03/2023 20:59

It is very likely her name has been entered incorrectly into a central database. The next time you have an in-person appointment ask the receptionist to check her patient record. Have her birth certificate or passport with you and ask them to correct the record. It will be a bit of a hassle but much less than going to court

You might have to live with the prescriptions, however. There are usually a limited number of characters that fit on the label and it just cuts it off. My son’s medical notes as a newborn all had him down as Baby Smith Jo rather than Smith Jones.

Twoinapod · 14/03/2023 20:58

@SpinningFloppa even with a hyphen that will still happen a lot. A lot of the time computer systems will only have so much space so will only use one name. It really isn’t a big deal, try to let it go

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 14/03/2023 20:43

Mostly medical. For example today I collected her prescription and despite me giving them her full name they called out only his name when I went to collect it. Same with medical letters they will be addressed to miss jones, rather than miss smith jones (not real names) I correct people when it happens but it doesn’t stop it happening I have to correct everyone every single time.

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ZoyaTheDestroyer · 14/03/2023 20:35

What are the companies / organisations who are writing to her? Have you written to them to correct the error and tell them that her legal surname is YourName ExesName? If that is the name on her birth certificate then that is her legal name and you can insist that they correct their records.

Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 14/03/2023 20:32

ZoyaTheDestroyer · 14/03/2023 19:01

TBH OP in your position I would just start using a hyphen every time you fill their name in on a form. You will only be challenged if you attempt this on a legal document such as a passport - in most other settings (school, doctors etc) it will be accepted without question as people generally expect double-barrelled names to be hyphenated. The double-barrelled name can appear on a passport etc without a hyphen. Once the child is 18 they can apply for a deed poll in their own right to add the hyphen legally. Going to court seems like a bit of a sledgehammer to crack a walnut.

Hyphens are a matter of style rather than legality anyway. My name is no less legally double-barrelled for not having a hyphen.

I’m not sure how I would do that now as it’s already down on the system. School already use only my surname as I asked them to and they have been fine with it, everywhere else has been a problem. So I get letters for miss (exes name) for dd no mention of my name.

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Original poster

SpinningFloppa · 14/03/2023 20:08

olderthanyouthink · 14/03/2023 19:43

My kids have a hyphenated surname, at nursery DD was Firstname MySurname on her peg and Firstname DPSurname on the app 🙄, DS was called as Firstname DPSurname at the doctors last week and then they wonder why they can't find his record 🙄🙄🙄

It might help but it might not. Also depends on the names I supposed, my surname could be a first/middle name

Thank you at least it isn’t just happening to us. It actually happens all the time, no one uses mine at all, I wouldn’t mind if they used both, it’s that they are not. No one uses mine it’s been dropped completely.

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olderthanyouthink · 14/03/2023 19:45

Oh and then sometimes an online form won't let me put a hyphen or space (Drs again!) some they're MySurnameDPSurname sometimes