Page 4 | DD hates her name and surname

9thFloorNightmare · 2023-01-25T22:21:29+00:00

She is 15 now. The pregnancy was so good, the only issue was finding a name! I could not choose. It was agony. One day, just before her birth, I woke up from a lovely afternoon nap, the TV was on and 1st thing I heard / saw was an ad of a product with a human and - the image of a lovely young girl (I didn't know the baby's sex). Right at that time I decided if she was a girl she would have that name. It is an international (could be pretty much from a lot of different countries and cultures) short, simple, easy to spell, sounds good (to my ears) name. In hindsight I could have choses a middle name, but I jus't couldn't ;( She hates it. Hates her surname too which is a traditional surname in the UK. Any one dealing with the same at home?

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Calphurnia88 · 27/01/2023 12:16

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 12:04

When I hear Flora I think of flowers - but maybe because that is how we scientifically refer to the flowers categories where I come from -

Show quote history

Yep, as in Flora and Fauna.

It's a beautiful name but would most definitely conjure up images of yellow, buttery (but not actual butter), spread. In the UK anyway.

I say this as someone who shares a surname with a very niche American singer. Most people haven't heard of him, but I still get a couple of people commenting on it a year. It's fun, but if it happened every day, or even every week, it would get old pretty quickly.

You sound pretty confident that that isn't what's happening though.

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 12:04

Tdcp · 27/01/2023 11:18

Is it Alexa?

not Alexa

OP posts:

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 12:04

Calphurnia88 · 27/01/2023 11:47

*spread (?)

Oops!

As I said, I don't use it so I just think of it as butter. Hopefully that doesn't distract too much from the analogy 😇

Show quote history

When I hear Flora I think of flowers - but maybe because that is how we scientifically refer to the flowers categories where I come from -

OP posts:

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 12:02

saraclara · 27/01/2023 11:31

Are you (and others) seriously suggesting the OP put her teenaged daughter's full name on a very popular public forum? Really?

Show quote history

Did I ever announce this thread as a guessing game? Seriously some ppl need to work on their comprehension skills

OP posts:

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 12:00

Calphurnia88 · 27/01/2023 11:26

Flora is an uncommon human name, but most people would associate it with butter. I'm more of a Lurpak girl myself, but I am very much aware that Flora butter exists and if I met a girl called Flora I would probably think oh, like the butter. I wouldn't say it though because she probably gets it all the time and finds it annoying.

That's not a guess by the way, but an example.

Now if there was also a very famous American singer called Flora, and people also said oh, like the singer and maybe even sang Flora songs at Flora, that could get really annoying for her. She might wish she had a different name and even feel angry towards the person that gave her that name.

I'm not trying to be an arse here btw, but you might need to consider that even nice names can lead to bullying.

Show quote history

People her age are not even aware the singer exists - and to be reminded of that singer would be an honour IMO - and older people who might know the singer would not be so childish I hope - unless they are some MNetters of course

OP posts:

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 11:57

BloodAndFire · 27/01/2023 11:21

You are of course right not to share your daughter's name.

You shouldn't have included all the info about how you came up with it in your first post, because people have just got stuck on the idea that it's a stupid novelty product name.

I also don't really understand why you then gave a 'clue' (the US singer) if you didn't want people to keep guessing!

to make the point it is a normal and acceptable human name rather than something ridiculous

MN attracts some weird people

OP posts:

Calphurnia88 · 27/01/2023 11:47

WhoppingBigBackside · 27/01/2023 11:42

@Calphurnia88 , Flora isn't butter

*spread (?)

Oops!

As I said, I don't use it so I just think of it as butter. Hopefully that doesn't distract too much from the analogy 😇

Mirabai · 27/01/2023 11:46

No-one was expecting her full name for obvious reasons - but a first name shared with a famous US singer can hardly be identifying.

WhoppingBigBackside · 27/01/2023 11:42

@Calphurnia88 , Flora isn't butter

saraclara · 27/01/2023 11:31

ohlookout · 26/01/2023 07:43

These fucking guessing games are tedious

Are you (and others) seriously suggesting the OP put her teenaged daughter's full name on a very popular public forum? Really?

Sugarfree23 · 27/01/2023 11:28

Funny how it's always the man's surname which is more aesthetically pleasing, isn't it?

Well no, I know of a Mr Onions who was most upset that Mr Onions Jr decided to become Mr Wifesname. In a bid to save their future kids going through school with many 🌰 Onions jokes

Calphurnia88 · 27/01/2023 11:26

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 11:06

The product is named after a human

I have never used that product

I like the name and the product just brought the name to my awareness

Show quote history

Flora is an uncommon human name, but most people would associate it with butter. I'm more of a Lurpak girl myself, but I am very much aware that Flora butter exists and if I met a girl called Flora I would probably think oh, like the butter. I wouldn't say it though because she probably gets it all the time and finds it annoying.

That's not a guess by the way, but an example.

Now if there was also a very famous American singer called Flora, and people also said oh, like the singer and maybe even sang Flora songs at Flora, that could get really annoying for her. She might wish she had a different name and even feel angry towards the person that gave her that name.

I'm not trying to be an arse here btw, but you might need to consider that even nice names can lead to bullying.

BloodAndFire · 27/01/2023 11:21

You are of course right not to share your daughter's name.

You shouldn't have included all the info about how you came up with it in your first post, because people have just got stuck on the idea that it's a stupid novelty product name.

I also don't really understand why you then gave a 'clue' (the US singer) if you didn't want people to keep guessing!

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 11:19

*generated

OP posts:

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 11:19

This thread genereate an interesting dialogue about the ways of the world which I’m very happy with

I don’t feel safe to reveal the name and surname - and it isn’t even mine to reveal, it doesn’t sound right to me that I write DD’s name here even if she can not be tracked down

She has shorten her name by one letter and it sounds nice

For the ones making jokes using products that are clearly not human names - I sincerely hope you had fun:)

For the ones complaining that the thread is ridiculous and pointless: what are you doing here? Go to a post that is fullfilling to you! No one forced you to read and participate

If the name was so strongly associated with the product to the point people couldn’t think of nothing else when hearing it and it causing bullying etc, how come no one guessed it correctly yet even though I gave two very revealing clues? Obviously the connection with the product is very subtle.

OP posts:

Tdcp · 27/01/2023 11:18

Is it Alexa?

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 11:06

Agapornis · 27/01/2023 00:51

Have you told her she is named after a product?

I know two people whose names are inspired by a product, and while they look like normal names, they hate that their parents named them after a product.

The product is named after a human

I have never used that product

I like the name and the product just brought the name to my awareness

OP posts:

Original poster

9thFloorNightmare · 27/01/2023 11:03

Shecrazy · 26/01/2023 23:54

Is her name Celine?

If it is, it's quite an unusual name for a 15 year old, and would be associated with Celine Dion probably (although I think she's Canadian not American, so maybe not).

I know the name doesn't really matter, but if everyone keeps singing 'my heart will go on' at her with arms outstretched a la Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio, I can see that would get rather irritating over time 😬

not Celine

OP posts:

BellePeppa · 27/01/2023 10:45

Shecrazy · 26/01/2023 23:54

Is her name Celine?

If it is, it's quite an unusual name for a 15 year old, and would be associated with Celine Dion probably (although I think she's Canadian not American, so maybe not).

I know the name doesn't really matter, but if everyone keeps singing 'my heart will go on' at her with arms outstretched a la Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio, I can see that would get rather irritating over time 😬

I love the name Celine. I’d be very happy to have that.

BellePeppa · 27/01/2023 10:39

WimpoleHat · 26/01/2023 19:14

I don’t think the names are relevant, it’s the fact she hates them. What does it matter to us if her name is Mary, Susan, Maria or Cinderella?

While changing your name by deed poll is perfectly possible legally, it is something that you’ll carry for life. Lots of forms require “other names used” to be declared and, from knowing someone who did this, it raises questions as to why. In his case, working in financial services, there was always a suggestion of fraud somewhere. Because it’s a really unusual thing to do. And - as a pp has said - what you think would be a “cool” name at 15 isn’t necessarily what you’ll like at 50. So - if her name is Mary or Susan, they’re perfectly normal names and ones that she might like better as an older woman. So I’d probably encourage her to try a nickname or to feel more positively about it. If her name is Cinderella? Very different kettle of fish.

My name is a ‘normal’ name, in fact a close friend has the same name, and a well known actress has the same name, they don’t appear to have a problem with it. I absolutely hate it for me and I have since I was tiny, I don’t hate it for others so to me the actual name of the OP’s DD is irrelevant to us, the readers. The name doesn’t have to be a universally hated name it just has to be the person who was given it who hates it - for them.

BloodAndFire · 27/01/2023 10:04

@squigglypasta

Thank you for the apology, i appreciate it.

Yes, there is a huge amount of racism and misogyny in the uk and a failure to recognise those aspects of British culture. But not the case here.

squigglypasta · 27/01/2023 10:01

Ignorant – not even about other cultures, but about their own history

So again, apologies. I don't want to be seen as having played the race card.

squigglypasta · 27/01/2023 10:00

@BloodAndFire apologies – perhaps projection on my part.

I've seen so many comments on MN plus other British forums asking "are they from a culture that doesn't respect women", talking about other "backward" cultures, and so on... Completely ignoring the fact that the UK (Victorian norms) is primarily responsible for a massive amount of misogynistic, homophobic, generally punitive legislation in like fifty countries around the world. (Many of these existing laws still carry the same name the British rulers enacted them under mere decades ago.)

So yes apologies, I think I've come to expect those double standards / ignorant stereotypes as the default attitude, and was being way oversensitive in this case.

Mummyof3Me2021 · 27/01/2023 09:58

Miley

BloodAndFire · 27/01/2023 09:45

@squigglypasta

possibly also because of stereotypes you have about people from other cultures

more than happy not to engage further, but I would appreciate if you didn't try to insinuate that I'm a racist.

especially as I've pointed out on this thread that I'm also from a non-British, non-White background.

that is a really low blow, completely unjustified by anything I've said, and you should apologise for it.

obviously you won't, but other posters should be aware in case they were considering replying to you, that you're likely to throw around accusations like this with no basis.

Really scummy way to behave.