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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Parents hate name choice

105 replies

Merrow · 05/12/2022 18:09

DP and I have finally settled on a name for DS2, Innes. My parents vocally dislike it and keep suggesting alternatives. Yes, we should just have kept silent on names, but we didn't. There's no real point to this post, it's just getting me down! I don't really want to keep on searching for another name, but it also doesn't feel that nice that people already dislike his name.

OP posts:
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Crispynoodle · 05/12/2022 22:02

Love it my DSIL is called Inace the feminine version

nothingmuchaboutjerry · 05/12/2022 21:59

Only Innes I know is female and from Portugal. The name I chose for DD2 wasn't a "family favourite" but it's your child and your choice, don't be pressurised.

CrazyBiscuits · 05/12/2022 21:56

At least you're prepared for their reaction. My dm didn't tell me that she didn't particularly like my choice of name however when my friend had a dc years later and I told her the name she said that it was a lovely name. She also said that anytime I mentioned him in a conversation just to press the point. I don't actually like the name so I'd never had used it anyway.

Your parents had their choice of naming you. Its now your choice, not theirs. If its going to bother you that much then decide on another name and don't tell them until dc is born. Or stick to it and they'll just have to lump it.

I'm not going to give me opinion as its nothing to do with me as its your child. It doesn't matter what I think. It just matters what you think.

Brandybucks · 05/12/2022 21:47

Sometimes grandparents have a point (I knew of a boy named Dickie…middle name Edward…Dick Ed for heavens sake) but in this case I think it’s a nice traditional Scottish name and you should go with it if you love it!

User38899953 · 05/12/2022 21:46

My opinion is irrelevant, but I love the name! Ignore your parents !

Popskipiekin · 05/12/2022 21:45

I love Innes. I’m extending fellow feeling re naming boy number 2: we also found our second Scottish boy name harder to alight on and went slightly whacky as a result. And we kept DS2’s name to ourselves until birth due to the reaction to DS1’s name.

My lovely parents persisted in trying to get us to change DS1’s (totally standard, top 10 Scottish name) name when he was in the womb. DS2 has a highly unusual name and I’m sure my parents would have had masses to say about it, but given he came out named, they shut up. 😂

DramaAlpaca · 05/12/2022 21:44

Oh I love Innes, what a good choice.

PermanentTemporary · 05/12/2022 21:43

Ooh it's fantastic. What a great name. Congratulations! Almost makes me want another baby.

I know if I ever have a gc I will find the name a shock (I can still see my DM's frozen face when she heard ds's name for the first time 😁) but of course she got used to it vv quickly.

Bootskates · 05/12/2022 21:38

When my parents said they "weren't keen" on DD's name, I just said I'm not keen on my name so clearly we have different tastes.

UsingChangeofName · 05/12/2022 21:36

I mean, it isn't a name that would be on my list, but - as I hope I will say when the time comes for my dc to tell me what they are naming their dc - I've had my turn at naming my children, now it is your turn.

For anyone reading this thread that hasn't done so yet though, this is your regular reminder to not discuss names with your nearest and dearest before the baby arrive, unless you are genuinely still sounding people out.
When you know the one, don't tell anyone as people hearing a name before the baby is hear, hear "we are thinking of this, what do you think?", whether you mean it or not.

lifeinthehills · 05/12/2022 21:35

They don't have to like it. They got to name their own babies. Your turn to name yours what you want.

"Mum and Dad, I know you don't like the name but it's what we've decided and we're not changing it." Every time they make an alternative suggestion, "No, thanks, name decided."

If you have another baby, don't tell them the name till the baby is born.

mauvish · 05/12/2022 21:34

The only Innes-es I've ever met have been wee boys.

I like the name, but then again I like a lot of Scottish boys names (but not Menzies, if you say Mingis I just think "minging"!)

TheHouseIsInACircleNow · 05/12/2022 21:34

Why are so many people confusing Innes (Ih-nuss) with “Ines/Inez” (Ih-nez). Completely different bloody names, it’s not hard!

maryofthevirginkind · 05/12/2022 21:33

They might hate the blame but they'll love the baby so ignore them.

FixItUpChappie · 05/12/2022 21:32

Just tell them bluntly that they are offending you and to stop. That's what I did and I never heard a peep about it again.

Mrsjayy · 05/12/2022 21:31

Apparently Inez Is Spainish/Portuguese for Agnes.

Outfor150 · 05/12/2022 21:31

DarkDarkNight · 05/12/2022 21:26

I think it’s lovely, but prefer the spelling Inez. I didn’t know it was a Scottish name as well, I would have thought more Spanish or Portuguese.

FYI, It’s mentioned in a Taylor Swift song (Betty) as it is the name of her friend Blake Lovely’s daughter. As a fan this would be a bonus for me.

Inez is a girl’s name!
It has nothing to do with the old and well known Scottish boy’s name Innes. Well, at least I thought it was quite well known, if not exactly common. It’s a nice name.

Purplecatshopaholic · 05/12/2022 21:28

Lovely Scottish boys name. Love Innes. It’s my friends sons name.

herewego9 · 05/12/2022 21:27

Innes and Inez are completely different names! The former is a Scottish boys name and the latter is a Portuguese/Spanish girls name.

Luredbyapomegranate · 05/12/2022 21:26

hattie43 · 05/12/2022 18:12

Horrible . I'm with your parents . The only Innes I ever met was a lady .

Innes is a great Scottish boys name.

However, if you aren’t actually in Scotland I guess it could confuse people what with Ines/Inez being a more popular and v similar name for girls.

I guess this is what’s bothering them, rather than they hate the name?

DarkDarkNight · 05/12/2022 21:26

I think it’s lovely, but prefer the spelling Inez. I didn’t know it was a Scottish name as well, I would have thought more Spanish or Portuguese.

FYI, It’s mentioned in a Taylor Swift song (Betty) as it is the name of her friend Blake Lovely’s daughter. As a fan this would be a bonus for me.

BeanieTeen · 05/12/2022 21:26

It’s ok for them not to like it. It’s also more than ok for you to not give a shit whether they like it - so I’d just go ahead and do that.

BeaLola · 05/12/2022 21:26

Obviously too late to wait until he is here - they are being rude - try and rise above it and if they get to you say (if you can seriously)well we could go back to our other choice Rumpelstiltskin-Ray as we feel those names are somewhat underused but we were concerns you wouldn't like it !😂

Remaker · 05/12/2022 21:23

There are parents all over the country who hate their GC’s name. A close friend of mine was ecstatic about becoming a GP but mortified about the name.

The difference is they were told after the baby was born so they just smiled and said ‘oh lovely, how do you spell that?’ Or something similar. If you tell them the name before the baby is born they feel like they’ve a chance to talk you out of it. If you like it, stick with it they’ll get used to it.

pictish · 05/12/2022 21:22

I’m Scottish and like Scottish names but must admit, for whatever reason, I’ve never liked Innes. I don’t know if it’s a love or loathe one.

Love Angus. Also Menzies.