Active discussions

Help protect children from gaming harms.

Take our survey

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Can people with older kids help me with this middle name q?

79 replies

purplejungle · 15/10/2022 11:13

Our first son has two middle names, both family names to honour people who died whilst I was pregnant. I'm pregnant again with another boy and not fussed necessarily about this one also having two middle names. But is this the sort of things kids care about when they get older?! Should they both have two middle names to be fair?! Thanks!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Medoca · 17/10/2022 22:26

DurdleSnore · 17/10/2022 22:12

Yep. This.

Show quote history

Agree with the sulking, but I’d say give them all a different number - then they’ll learn life isn’t about people doing stuff to suit themselves.

DurdleSnore · 17/10/2022 22:12

SingingSands · 15/10/2022 11:52

Siblings will sulk about anything they perceive as "unfair". All way into their seventies.

Give them both 2 middle names, keep the peace 😄

Yep. This.

Titsflyingsouth · 17/10/2022 17:25

I have 1 middle name. My brother has 2. I can honestly say I have never given a crap at any point in my life...

Dreamingof3 · 17/10/2022 16:12

I don't think it matters. 2 of my children have 2 middle names but the 3rd will most likely have 1, I'm not adding a second middle name in for the sake of it that doesn't have a meaning to us.

Also as someone with 3 middles names compared to my siblings' one each...its never been an issue other than the jokes over how my names were chosen!

DramaAlpaca · 15/10/2022 21:19

I can still remember feeling a bit upset as a child that my sibling got two middle names when I was given only one.

Needless to say, my children have the same number of names.

sakura06 · 15/10/2022 20:41

I don't have a middle name but all my brothers have at least one. I was a bit upset when I was little (generally because I never did well at the 'Letters in your Name' game)! My children have two middle names each.

GetTheGoodLookingGuy · 15/10/2022 17:19

I was incredibly indignant about this as a toddler, and complained to my mum that my baby brother had two middle names. She said, "He doesn't - what do you mean?" and I replied, "Yes he does: Alex. Ander."

If he really did have two middle names, I'm sure I would've got over it eventually!

Ilovedthe70s · 15/10/2022 16:40

My eldest has two middle names, the other 5 don’t have any. None of them have ever questioned or cared about it. I suspect it would only have been an issue if they absolutely ran out of anything else to argue about. That never happened!

Lyonesse2020 · 15/10/2022 16:35

I had one middle name and my (younger) brother had one plus our mum's maiden name. It rankled sufficiently that when I was baptised as a teenager, I added in mum's maiden name, so now we match.

Ship · 15/10/2022 16:27

I have 2 and my siblings only have one. I’m jealous of them because I hate having 2 and my 2 are awful as well

Isaidnoalready · 15/10/2022 16:25

Just to add there isn't really any angst over the middle name thing with my children because I made it clear ds only had extra to stop the arguing with my family

Medoca · 15/10/2022 16:24

My sibling has one, I have zero! Never been an issue.

inheritanceshiteagain · 15/10/2022 16:24

I have no middle name and was a little jealous of my brothers as it's seemed more refined to have one, but now don't give a toss

Isaidnoalready · 15/10/2022 16:23

Ds one has two middle names due to a family argument ds two just has one

My dad doesnt have one because his twin had it his older brother USES his middle name instead of his first name as he hates it so much my mom and her sisters never had one her parents did though 😂

Thesearmsofmine · 15/10/2022 16:18

One of my siblings has two middle names. The rest of us couldn’t care less.

NC12345665 · 15/10/2022 16:14

steppemum · 15/10/2022 14:48

so rather than the number of names being an issue, I think the fact that the older ones have 'special' names for people who died and the youngest doesn't have a 'special' family name would niggle me more.

The youngest one is luckier imo. I wouldn't want to be named after someone else. My older sister has 3 middle names and they're all dead relatives. I like being my own person with my unusual names.

Hopelessacademic · 15/10/2022 15:27

I would give them all the same number, and try and find something meaningful if you haven't used up all the "special" names!
My DD has 2 middle names, one is a family name from DHs family, and the other is my surname (I didn't change my name).

SausageMonkey2 · 15/10/2022 14:59

My sister has two (the youngest) I have one (oldest). No-one gives a shit. Apart from her when it doesn’t fit in the little boxes they give you on forms to add your name.

SemperIdem · 15/10/2022 14:58

One of my grandmothers didn’t have a middle name whilst all her younger siblings did, it mildly irritated her until her dying day. I think disliking her given name didn’t help matters.

I’m sure as long as you give him at least one middle name, it’ll be fine!

shiningstar2 · 15/10/2022 14:56

My two brothers have middle names. I don't. It has always irritated me. Why the difference? DM said she didn't think a middle name was necessary for a girl. 😱

GiltEdges · 15/10/2022 14:53

DH and BIL both have two middle names. SIL only has one. Even as an adult woman of almost 40 years old she still mentions the unfairness/sexism in her parents decision not to give her a second middle name.

Thingsthatgo · 15/10/2022 14:53

I come from a big family and we all have the same number of middle names. We definitely would have teased each other if it had been different, but we teased each other mercilessly. It was mostly good natured.

MurderOfBirds · 15/10/2022 14:50

I have a middle name, my younger sister doesn't. It does bother her, slightly. I don't think she loses sleep over it though.

But yes, I would give all DC the same number of middle names.

Frazzled2207 · 15/10/2022 14:48

Both of our sons have two middle names only because we couldn’t agree on one either time so had one each of our choices, both times.
I see your point but middle names are just never used so it’s a non issue. Nobody outside our immediate family knows our sons’ middle names

steppemum · 15/10/2022 14:48

so rather than the number of names being an issue, I think the fact that the older ones have 'special' names for people who died and the youngest doesn't have a 'special' family name would niggle me more.