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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Name a baby after an ex ?

28 replies

NH87 · 26/09/2022 13:41

Hi Everyone. Straight forward question. I’ve been married to a lovely man 10 years, together almost 13 years. Before him I was in a same sex relationship with a woman who lets say was my first love but it was less than a year, toxic and ended badly. I did love her but not as much as my husband. I was young etc We were talking about baby names recently as we are hoping to try soon and I came out with the name Catherine which is my ex’s name which I love and he also said he really liked. I didn’t immediately click til about an hour later and I was like oh my god! I brought it up to him and apologised for even suggesting that name and he was like ahh it’s ok I didn’t even realise! He said he connects the name to Zeta Jones or Williams wife! Lol (his words) Thing is, if he had mentioned his ex’s name I’d have been shocked probably. I just love the name Catherine Iris. I really have my heart set on these names if we do have a girl as we are hoping to try after Xmas. There’s no guarantees we will even have a girl and he likes the name Andrew Scott for a boy due to his Scottish heritage. I might even be off that name by then. I also like Jacqueline but prefer Catherine. There’s really NO connection to my ex. I haven’t seen her for years, never ever think of her it really is just the name. Is it disrespectful to my husband or any daughter I may have? I just shocked myself for saying that name and not immediately not putting the two & two together. Thanks :-)

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Alarm59 · 26/09/2022 13:52

Is that you Adam Levine?

jokes aside, don’t do it. My dad insisted on my name , it was the same as an ex. My mother somehow went through with it but was forever bitter about it. I find it weird and changed it in my twenties.

Puppers · 26/09/2022 13:48

So you don’t want to name the baby after your ex. You just like the name and it happens to also be your ex’s. If you and your husband are both ok with it then what’s the issue?

One of my DC is named after my grandad. It happens to also be the name of an ex. We don’t make that connection at all, despite it being a fairly uncommon name. Maybe other people who know me (i.e. friends who are aware of the ex but not my grandad) have privately judged or made assumptions. I neither know nor care.

Kite22 · 26/09/2022 13:44

With a relatively common name like that, I wouldn't think twice - especially as you dh is happy with it.
Slightly different if it were a really rare, 'out there' sort of name where she was the only person anyone had met, with that name.

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