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Original poster

People's comments on my son's names

113 replies

Petmalex · 20/04/2022 19:07

I have two sons, a just-turned 3 year old called Jason and a 4 month old called Robert/Robbie.

When we introduced Robbie to Jason's nursery teacher and my health visitor, they both commented 'oh, like Take That'. I shrugged it off to begin with but I can't seem to shake this horrible feeling I get that I can't really describe... Perhaps someone can put some words/sense to it. Everyone around me thinks I'm being ridiculous and overthinking it. Jason was named because his name means to heal (we lost a baby prior to him at 23 weeks in my pregnancy and we lost a baby at 24 weeks after him but before Robbie) so Jason really has been my healer to get through some very dark times. Both my partner and I loved the name Robbie and agreed on it. And since learned that it means 'bright fame/glory'. My Robert is the brightness after the darkness of our most recent loss. However, since these Take That comments, I've been really struggling to call him Robbie without being reminded of Take That. I'm mid 30s and the comments were made by women who would remember Take That. I'm not really into music so didn't think of it. They are both traditional, normal names that can't be changed. My mindset needs to change but I've tried for months now and I can't seem to move past it. I'm hoping that by sharing this here someone will offer some insight as to why I feel this way, why I'm taking it so seriously and why it upsets me so much. Like my living sons are so special and unique but someone has mocked it/making their names common and not unique (Jason's teacher doesn't know of our losses but my health visitor does so should have known better). Thank you for reading. I do suffer from anxiety and intermittent depression so perhaps these comments were made during my baby blues stage.

OP posts:
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miltonj · 08/05/2022 16:55

I absolutely love Jason. If it wasn't a family members name already and I didn't have daughters, I would name my son Jason. Robbie is very cute and was on my list before we found out we were having girls. Gorgeous names. Say them with pride and confidence.

RedWingBoots · 08/05/2022 16:48

Petmalex · 08/05/2022 15:50

Also, I think it upsets me because I don't want people to think I've named my children after a 'cheesy' boyband.

I immediately thought of Take That when I saw the names together.

I wasn't a fan but some of my slightly younger friends were.

They were and are a fascinating boy band. For any band to last long they can't be cheesy.

noborisno · 08/05/2022 16:44

People are going to mention it. Sorry you didn't know before but it will come naturally for the rest of your life. Just learn to be okay with that.

Robinni · 08/05/2022 16:32

I wouldn’t have thought that you’d named them after the band either…. Honestly there are associations for everything…

To comfort you here are the top ten boys names in UK according to google and some associations…

Oliver Twist
Jack the Ripper
Noah and the arc
Leo nardo da Vinci/DiCaprio
Thomas the Tank Engine
George Ezra/Prince George
Daniel Craig
Ethan Hawke
Benjamin Button
Alexander the Great

Other popular names
Harry Enfield/Prince Harry
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Sebastian crab off of The Little Mermaid
Freddie Krueger

It’s just an association, it doesn’t mean anything.

Georgeskitchen · 08/05/2022 16:24

You're massively ovethinking this. Plenty of men/boys called robert/Robbie. I'm over 60 and I've known males called Jason and Robbie decades before anyone heard of Take That!!

savoycabbage · 08/05/2022 16:17

You haven't named them after a boyband though. Other people can think what they want to think. You can't do anything about it.

Just think of some dismissive responses.

No, I didn't.
Never heard of them.
I'm only 27.
No, we liked the meanings.
What are your children called?
Sorry, have to hurry you. We are off to buy a yacht.

TabithaTittlemouse · 08/05/2022 16:15

I wasn’t a take that fan but thought of them when I started reading.
Despite not being a fan I wouldn’t mock you or assume that you named them after the band.

I am really sorry for your losses.

Robinni · 08/05/2022 16:05

Petmalex · 08/05/2022 15:50

Also, I think it upsets me because I don't want people to think I've named my children after a 'cheesy' boyband.

It depends what way you look at it Progress fastest selling album in 21st century, RW album 30th best selling of all time… showing my colours now 😉

I mean they were hardly Chico off of the ex factor now were they or 911 or shudder East 17 eek!

Seriously, name choice up to you and as another poster says if somebody says it again and it bothers you just say “ah you’re showing your age now aren’t you” x

Robinni · 08/05/2022 15:55

p.s. @Petmalex

Somebody else said

it honestly says more about them and their cultural reference points than it does about you or your boys or their names.

This is so true - nobody that your boys will grow up with and hardly any of their mothers will know the names of Take that members…. Or make a big deal out of it…. I am sure there are countless brothers called Harry and Niall or Louis and Liam without being bombarded with 1D references….. fewer Zayns…

Take that fans were a special breed though, I still remember their birthdays….

At least it is a positive association - anyone who hears the names may be reminded of very happy times!

Your boys are just perfect as they are, I went through losses too and there was a lot of thought and meaning put into DC names - we had to add an extra one when realised the initials spelt a terrorist organisation 🥴

Enjoy Jason and Robbie xx

Tlollj · 08/05/2022 15:50

I wouldn’t have made the connection but I’m old.
The people who would make the connection I would think are fans so it’s not a negative connection.

Original poster
Petmalex · 08/05/2022 15:50

Also, I think it upsets me because I don't want people to think I've named my children after a 'cheesy' boyband.

OP posts:
Robinni · 08/05/2022 15:33

If you say the words Jason and Robbie to any woman who was a pre-teen/teen/20s in the nineties it will automatically make her think “ah yes, and Mark, Gary and Howard.

Take That are a big part of British culture. They were huge.

If you had chosen Jason and Mark it wouldn’t be so recognisable but Robbie is like the Ringo of Take That it’s distinctive.

I know you have been through a hard time and you have all these sentimental reasons why you chose the names and that’s fine. They are your sons and you can call them whatever you like - people will always find associations - If you’d called him Bruno everyone would be saying ah! Like Bruno Mars or they’d burst into song….

Just call your son by his name - Robert - if it bothers you that much, you won’t get the same associations… or Bob, Bobbie, Rob, Bertie, Bert….

Also I am pretty sure I can't seem to shake this horrible feeling I get that I can't really describe is very similar to some take that lyrics… wracking brain now and I now have Pray on loop in my head… argh

Scabbyknackers · 08/05/2022 15:14

Don't take it to heart OP! Yes it's quite a strong association for those who remember the 90s but it's not a bad one in any way- Take That are a happy connection for a lot of people and I don't think any of them have done anything particularly wrong over the years. Every time someone mentions it just Smile.

2bazookas · 08/05/2022 15:03

You're overthinking it all.

Strangers have absolutely no clue what significance you attach to the names. They are just making very casual throw-away chitchat that doesn't even expect a response. Just let it go.

Trinacham · 08/05/2022 14:32

I am a bit like this with my 3 month old. He's called Evan. I remember in hospital the Paediatrician saying "ah, he owns a bike shop!"
I know he wouldn't have meant it in a mocking way, but I've been analysing that response and everyone else's responses to the name aswell! I think it must be normal to overthink their names, but I wish I could stop!

Trinacham · 08/05/2022 14:29

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Original poster
Petmalex · 08/05/2022 14:04

Pedropony76 It does make sense that people would think of a group if they were a fan and knew the members by name. The whole thing is such a coincidence and wouldn't bother most people at all. I'm sure there are many mums out there with sons called Jason and Robbie or other combinations of Take That, or other bands. I just fear people will make that assumption I guess.

OP posts:
pedropony76 · 08/05/2022 09:38

*there not their🙄

pedropony76 · 08/05/2022 09:30

Oh I see, I didn’t even realise their was a Jason in Take That. It does make sense if you hear two names that were apart of a group and you suddenly think of the group. Most people would have just kept that thought in their heads though.

Try not to get upset about it. You know the meanings of their names are much deeper than that but other people may not

Original poster
Petmalex · 07/05/2022 17:21

I think I meant mocked as that is how I felt rather than them actually taking the mick? Also, the reference to Take That was because I have a Jason AND a Robbie/Robert, both of which are quite common names like you say.

OP posts:
pedropony76 · 07/05/2022 17:01

but someone has mocked it/making their names common and not unique

I can’t see how they mocked the name at all. You’ve said the name is Robbie and instantly they’ve thought of Robbie Williams and have said ‘oh like take that.’ It’s just a dumb association but doesn’t mean they mocked the name.

The name Robert/Robbie also isn’t unique at all…

Doidontimmm · 07/05/2022 16:49

I did automatically think take that but only because I was a massive fan! I didn’t think it in a negative way at all though. They are both good names in their own right.

Original poster
Petmalex · 07/05/2022 16:43

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to reply. It seems the majority wouldn't have made the association and those who did, happen to be Take That fans.

I don't know why I've taken this so negatively where, like some have said, it is a simple association and both names are nice and traditional. It wouldn't have bothered me if someone had thought we'd named Jason after Jason Statham. It also wouldn't have bothered me if people had thought we had named Robbie after Robbie Williams because I know both are untrue. It's the fact people have referred to a band and because I didn't know about it beforehand, I think I'm angry at myself that I didn't consider this more when we named Robbie and how it goes with Jason; whether there were any associations that I'd be comfortable with. We chose the name Robert/Robbie because we love the name (probably the only one we agreed on). We had a few weeks between naming him and registering him... Am I angry at myself for not changing it when we had the chance?! It didn't bother me then as much as it does now because I fell in love with the name Robbie (still am) and it didn't bother me that a few people thought Take That. So would I have changed anything when we did have the chance? Unlikely because that would mean I cared what these people think too much, more than I liked the name.

I know my mental state is questionable and I will seek professional help. I have to see past this because it's stopping me enjoying my boys which are both absolute miracles.

OP posts:
KirstenBlest · 21/04/2022 12:14

You just need a little patience, OP.

I would make that comment, because it would be how I would make a mental note of the names then I'd probably remember them as Gary and Howard

beetree1 · 21/04/2022 10:54

I'm 27 and didn't make the link to Take That but I guess there will always be someone somewhere who will but I wouldn't see it as a negative.

Although annoying they probably didn't mean any harm and they probably didn't know about the meaning's of the name either. I don't know any name meanings unless it's one I'm personally considering for my child.

I hope you're okay though x

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