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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Disagreeing with husband

62 replies

New30 · 13/04/2022 12:50

Hi

After multiple miscarriages and a difficult pregnancy our baby girl arrived over a week ago. The problem I now have is she ha no name. There is absolutely nothing that husband and I can agree on. He likes names that sound good in multiple languages, Cleo, Celia etc, I prefer plain and simple like Jenny and Charlotte. Help?!? How do we come to an agreement and can anyone suggest a name we might not of considered? I am getting really very upset by the situation

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Ohjustboreoff · 13/04/2022 13:28

Think we me and my DH with both our children. We both like vastly different names. His were more trendy and mine were more traditional. In the end I had to play the I've just carried them for 9 month and pushed them out of my Hoo Haa they will be called xxx!

Unsurprised456 · 13/04/2022 13:25

You lot are so strong on here.
“Manipulative”
“Toxic”
Oh deary me. You’ve got to laugh because otherwise Grin
Try not to think so harshly against others, your life will feel a lot less stressful.

Crazykatie · 13/04/2022 13:19

Nothing wrong with Celia, Jenny or Charlotte, Cleo is already shortened so I wouldn’t choose that.
You should not be disagreeing as long as the names are sensible.

GoodSoup · 13/04/2022 13:13

@Skelligsfeathers

I think you get to choose because you carried her for 9 months and gave birth to her.
That’s just manipulative bullshit.
SummaLuvin · 13/04/2022 13:02

@Skelligsfeathers

I think you get to choose because you carried her for 9 months and gave birth to her.
What toxic advice.

Parenting, including naming the child, should be a collaboration both parents agree on, being the mother doesn't mean her opinion trumps her husband. Any patent has the right to veto a name choice for any reason. Normally a compromise has to be reached, but bare minimum is both liking the name and agreeing to it.

OP - hopefully you can come to a choice you both love, perhaps try Kinder (an app that is like Tinder for names, any names you both swipe right on flash up as an option). My person favourite for classic, simple, yet beautiful, interesting, and not overly common name is Claudia.

Enko · 13/04/2022 13:01

I'm not talking of your favourites. I'm. Saying look at names you could both tolerate. And see where that leads.

There are apps you can both use to see if you get overlaps.

My children are not named anything near what I had expected when I was a teenage early.20s. They have names dh and I worked hard together to find names we liked and felt worked for our child. Now years later I LOVE. Their names. It's a part of our family path to find names we both liked.

New30 · 13/04/2022 12:59

@Skelligsfeathers

I think you get to choose because you carried her for 9 months and gave birth to her.
Today was the first time I said to him so I not just get the final say. He will just complain about it for the next 20 years so it probably isn’t worth it.

I’m so upset and it is having an impact on my bonding.

OP posts:
New30 · 13/04/2022 12:58

Sorry I should have said. We both wrote lists of our top 20 names and there was no crossover.

OP posts:
Skelligsfeathers · 13/04/2022 12:55

Charlotte is beautiful. You could have celia as a middle name.

Andacherryonthetop · 13/04/2022 12:55

Which languages in particular does he want the name to work in?
Some ideas may be:
Lia (Leah but spelt in a way that’s used in Greece, Spain etc but still a classic name)
Elodie
Katrina
Anna
Isabella
Maya

Enko · 13/04/2022 12:54

Doesn't sound like too hard a combination to make. Have a look at names you like and find the ones that work in other languages too and make a list. Get him to do the same in reverse. See if you have any in common

Laura
Maria
Anna
Ava. Comes to mind

Skelligsfeathers · 13/04/2022 12:53

I think you get to choose because you carried her for 9 months and gave birth to her.