Am I in the wrong here?

Ah I would find it a bit odd! And like another poster said, I would find it strange that she didn’t run it by me - like not asking for permission as such, but just giving you the heads up and explaining it’s the name they want.

What practical differences will it make to your lives? It us unlikely to be detrimental unless one of you makes it so.

It's just a name. They don't lessen or weaken with use.

My first cousin has the same name for her DS as mine. Her DD has one letter different, say Sophie and Sophia. It's not worried me at all.

How do you know she picked it after you? She could’ve had the name picked already so why not use the name she has chosen just because you called your daughter something similar.

Has she actually copied you or has she picked a name because she likes it and decided that was more important than being upset over similar names

Seems like every other child around here is some form of Isabel/Isabella/Isobel/Isabelle etc. The rest are Evie, Eve, Ava, Olivia etc. Unless you go for a very unusual name there will be loads of the same name out there that you will come across. It is a different name too, yes similar, but not the same.

Bless you @WolfieComport but try keep calm.

How pregnant is your friend? Does she even know the sex yet?

Do you see each other much in real life? Are your kids likely to go to same nursery / school etc? Do you share many other mutual friends?

Your DD was here first so if there is any judgement, it will always be obvious who used the name first.

I think it's an odd choice of name (and I know MN loves to say no-one owns a name but sometimes names are just too similar / close for comfort) but context is important.

Congratulations on your DD and don't let this ruin things for you.

And what if she had said ‘please may I name my child Isabella?’ That wouldn’t have changed op’s feelings. This is about op feeling she’s chosen a ‘really personal’ and special name and then realising that in fact it’s an incredibly popular name that lots of girls will have.

The fact that someone else used that name recently really shouldn't make any difference to that, using the name that means something to you matters more than the occasional moments where two children with the same very common name might be in the same place as each other. She's not doing anything "to" a close friend, there are thousands of children called Isabelle/a.

• Also if I’d had a son he’d have been a George. I fell in love with the name aged 14 when it was still an older bloke name and not popular. I knew no Georges in my 1700 pupil comp.

If I’d had a friend 14 years later with a George, and had a boy instead of my girl, I’d still have gone with George, although they’d know as every time I’ve met a small George I’ve probably said that’s what I’d have called a boy.

How much contact do you have with the children of your mum’s friends from her youth? Have they followed you through life, same class, university, workplace?

You and your friend both liked and chose similar names for your daughters, she won’t have copied. Your daughter will come across Izzys and the various forms of Isabelle wherever she goes for just that reason; lots of people like it. My 24 year old is an Isobel and I’ve had colleagues and friends with Isabelles since then. It’s a total non issue.

You can’t help your feelings but try to prevent them affecting your relationship. It would be incredibly childish.

With your baby being so recent I would be annoyed. I would never do this with a close friend

Honestly I don't think she's copied you and I do think you're unreasonable to be annoyed. It's just a popular name. I can't even count how many Isabel, Isabelle, Isobel, Isabella I know. It's loads!!

YABU, but mainly because this is a pretty common name, so it's unlikely she copied you and more likely this is just her favourite name. She shouldn't have to not use her favourite name just because you also used it.

My son has the same name as the son of a good friend. I said I liked it and would have used it if she hadn’t got in first. She said use it if you want. I don’t mind. I did. Having said that we live at opposite ends of the country and don’t really have friends in common. I wouldn’t have used it if we’d lived on each other’s doorsteps.

You will be told ‘she can use whatever name she likes mind your own business’ (a popular answer on Mumsnet) but the truth is that it was weird, rude, and very disrespectful of her to use the name without first asking if it was ok with you.

YABU.

I had a name picked for 7 years, even if someone close to me used it I would still use it. Thankfully nobody did. You don't know if she's loved the name for years.

I don't think it's wrong for her to use the same name. It's not like it's some rare family name she never heard of and is copying either.

I had a similar situation with a friend. She gave birth to a daughter two months before me and gave her the name I was planning to name my third child. I'd have used the name years before, but I had two boys before that girl, so couldn't give them that name. I had that name picked years before my friend used it. Maybe it's the same for your friend?

I did ask my friend if she'd mind if I used that name (she didn't at all) but I'd probably have used it even if she did, just because of the history I had with having that name in mind.

Openly possessive that should say!

Ah op I would be a bit upset too! I would also probably mention it to you before hand if I was your friend, even though she hasn't had the baby. However I do then think you would have to pretend you were ok with it for all the reasons mentioned above 😂. They're both lovely names and popular choices so it's difficult to be only possessive without looking v unreasonable...

You’re allowed to be miffed but you don’t own the name, sorry. You never know what their nn will be (if any) Iz, Izzy, Belle, Bella. We chose a name with lots of diminutives and DS is always called by his full name.

They are both lovely names and both very popular at the moment. How do you know this isn't a name she's loved for years and she felt a bit weird when you chose your DD's name. Neither of you can have "dibs" on a name. Isn't it nice you have similar taste?

In the nicest possible way you are being just a tiny bit crazy and should go back to just enjoying your lovely daughter.

Everyone uses nicknames anyway, you'll almost certainly call one Issy and one Bella. Yeah it'll be a little odd to start but I don't think it's so bad.

I think it depends how it is done. Unless it was a special family name I would never choose the same name as a friend. My friend chose the same name as my DD and I was annoyed because we had endlessly discussed lots of names, she told me their shortlist and reasons why - family names etc and then when child was born she just sent a text with the same name as my DD. No mention of it being the same etc. It just felt weird. When we text and chat it is still weird keep saying the same name to each other when discussing family life. They both have the same nickname too. I think out of courtesy you should at least say 'funny, we love that name too and it's on our shortlist.' I think people like their DC to feel like individuals and of course they might make friends with the same name in the future, but to have a close friend immediately use the same name can feel a bit deflating.

I don’t think you’re wrong as such as it’s natural to feel upset but I don’t thing she’s wrong, and I think you’d be wrong to say anything.

If you’d chosen Nayeli then she chose Anayeli I’d be thinking hmm that’s a bit odd! But Isabelle and Isabella are really really popular names. Every nursery I’ve worked in has at least 2 Bellas. Same as Amelia/Olivia/Eva/Sophia, I think it’s one of those that you have to accept you’ll meet lots of other Isabelles because it’s popular.

It’s a beautiful name.