name regret

I understand how you're feeling, it's horrible isn't it? My little one is almost a year now and I've regretted her name for ages. However, different to you, I chose a classic name. It just doesn't feel right, and when I read on Mumsnet that it's boring or dull it really does make me feel bad and like I've done my lovely little girl a disservice. I also chose in haste in that crazy period post birth and it was a compromise name between my partner and I. Like a PP mentioned, it's made me question every decision I've made since. No advice, but just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in feeling this way.

I’ve been feeling the same way about my DCs name. DC is currently 14 weeks and the name was my partners first choice and whilst I had initially liked it through pregnancy, by the end I didn’t and associated it with a lot of pain and worry. In my shocked postnatal state I agreed to it and it’s been eating me up since and I now struggle to say the name. I know I’m not well and have reached out for support with PND, but that’s going to take time to resolve and it means I now don’t trust myself to make a decision about the name change as I’m doubting every decision I make.
My DH and I chatted about different options of middle names etc. but still haven’t reached a final conclusion. Ultimately it is very easy to change a name before 1 year and I believe it’s not totally unusual to do, but you have to make sure you’re changing it for the right reasons (if that’s what you decide to do) and consider if there’s anything deeper going on. It’s also important to have another name that you absolutely love and think would be perfect if you do decide to change it. Hope you find peace with your decision, whatever you decide

Change it change it. My daughter is now 9 (years not months) and I have regretted hers since she was a few months old. I thought it was too late to change it then. Duh. I really regret that.

If your partner really loves it, then they won't want to change the name.

If you tell us what it is we can help find a compromise?

River is fine! It's actually a really nice name for a girl.

Just change it if you feel like this already. She won't remember and it is so easy to do. I did with one of mine. Very easy and cost the price of a new birth certificate.

That's a lovely and interesting message @AuntDympna

If it's River, OP, that's a gorgeous name and not skanky or try hard.

Hugs, I went through name regret. In hindsight, I was deeply depressed had zero support. I'm years on I love DD's name. I'd also say, name regret was the start of me second-guessing every decision I made for about ten years.

I bet it's a lovely name. Change it if it will help, make up a really great nickname and sing it to her if changing the official name is not an option.

Is it Willow? If so that's a lovely name and you could shorten it to Lola.

I usually go for really classic names like Jean, Greta etc; but I'd happily have a River

I think it's relatively common to have some of these thoughts OP, I know I did, but just remind yourself of why you chose the name in the first place, I'm sure it suits your DD perfectly.

If it still bothers you that much you could choose a nn to call her or even her middle name if she has one. I mostly get called by my nn by my family and it doesn't even have anything to do with my first name in any way, it just sort of stuck 🙈🤷‍♀️

River is lovely, not at all skanky!

@LanaDelBoy it's just when you have a nursery with 3 Romans and 1 Rowan that the names really do really merge together. I appreciate on their own the names have different feels and are different names. Theres just there so many Romans now. I get asked all the time if her name has a W or M in middle. Wasn't at all surprised to see RoMan was 2020s fastest rising name again.

If you regret it this much I’d change it now before it’s too late. I had name regret and didn’t do anything, now my child is 20 months old and whilst I’ve grown to love the name, if I’d have known how easy it was before 1 years old I would have done it.

Rowan's nice but if it's River, I would change it.

I instantly thought it may be River. If it is, I love it for a girl.

I also love Rowan for a girl! It's not in the same league as Roman for a boy imo - sounds lovely and foresty but also reminds me of Rowena.

I’m sure it’s a lovely name OP, and your dd will grow into it. But it would be easy to change it, and people would soon use the new name.

Are you ok - have you been worrying about the name a bit too much?

You can get the name changed.

What does your partner think of the name now? If it was top on his name list and he still likes it it then they might not be willing to change the name, and your daughter's name will be what it is. If it's one of the names mentioned above (River or Rowan) then I really don't think they are too try hard or skanky. Nature names are having a moment now so she should fit in nicely 😊 How are you in general? Sometimes fixating on your baby's name can be a sign of PND.

If the name is River I just wanted to say that I also do not think that the name River is 'try hard' at all I promise. It's a mainstream name , a bit trendy but nice. Familiar but a bit different. And not Try hard.

If it's Rowan then that's my daughters name and I regret it to be honest. If I'd been honest with myself sooner I could have changed it. I wish I had. Changing a name at such a young age is no big deal. Babies respond to any name you shout at them up to a certain age.
I wouldn't say the name is 'try hard' though it's just very very trendy and too similar to Roman which is the fastest rising boy name and is BOOMING. In fact I wish I had tried harder so that's the opposite of try hard. I wish I'd picked a more classic name rather than one that's clearly going to date and I hate the seemingly inevitable shortening to Row.

Does your partner still love it?

Nature names a beautiful.

What does your dh think? Is he happy with her name?