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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

My sister kind of stole my baby name :(

191 replies

Captainchaos8 · 01/11/2021 22:20

I told my sister a few months back that I really liked the name Judah for a boy. We were both expecting boys but she was dead set on calling her baby boy River so I thought I was on safe ground telling her my choice. Anyway she just came out of hospital and announced out tof the blu that her baby was to be Jude. I am completely gobsmacked and quite upset to be honest but I'm not prepared to cause a massive fuss and a fall out over a name. Anyway just wanted some advice, would you still call your baby Judah if your sister had named their baby Jude? Or do you all think I should just bow out graciously and go with my second choice which is Josiah or my hubby's first choice which is Theodore/Theo/Teddy?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Blubells · 02/11/2021 12:17

Judah will be changed to Judas or Judy, Josiah to Josie.

I disagree. Judah will probably become Jude and Josiah Joe or Jos.

Personally I don't like Teddy

tearitup · 02/11/2021 12:08

Love Theodore Joseph! Theo or Teddy for a nickname, both are lovely.

Come school days, Judah will be changed to Judas or Judy, Josiah to Josie.

Skeumorph · 02/11/2021 12:04

'Hi Sis congratulations! God I feel a bit weird though - PLEASE tell me you genuinely love Jude and you didn't just get the idea from our fake name? We only said Judah so that we could keep our real choices secret! So don't worry that there might be two 'Judes' around. I'll be singing Hey Jude all day now haha! It's a nice name though so all good I hope? Lots of love x'

VitalsStable · 02/11/2021 11:59

Judah is IMO awful. Sounds so harsh.

Tell her you were kicking it around as a name but really didn't get good feedback after asking all your friends. (And a million mumsnetters).

Go for something like Josiah or Gabriel they're much much nicer.

Blubells · 02/11/2021 11:54

Josiah is beautiful and memorable!

Theo is overused imo.

Heartsandroses · 02/11/2021 11:38

I know a family where the cousins are Leo and Leon
Nobody batted an eyelid at it
Go for the name you want
(I did raise a brow at siblings Noah and Nora-they where a bit too samey)

larkstar · 02/11/2021 11:20

To me Jude and Judah have completely different vibe about them - I don't like either of them that much TBH but mu opinion isn't important. I think the names could exist alongside each other - no problem - a nice similarity if anything. Maybe there are actually other tensions between the two of you and this is just one way in which it has come to the surface - I'd try not to have a fall out over it - you can say it perhaps put you off using Judah - look ahead and imagine how nice it will be for your kids to know each other, play together and for the pair of you to go out on days together. There are other great names mentioned here - Theo is very likeable.

Captainchaos8 · 02/11/2021 11:20

Thankyou all so much for your lovely, kind supportive replies, it has lifted my heart today. 💕

OP posts:
TheEleventhMonth · 02/11/2021 11:08

I do think baby brain takes over sometimes and I'm sure she didn't think it thru beyond thinking its a name she likes.

didn't Judus betray Jesus

Josiah and Theo/Theodore are wonderful names - I love them!. Also love Joe/Joseph. Those names have a cool vibe to them.

Probably not worth falling out with your sister over this- you'll need each others support with the babies and generally as time goes by. Cousins growing up together can have a lovely special bond.

Good luck with the baby OP 👶.

SoupDragon · 02/11/2021 11:02

I think kids will make and use any "dim" that they want.

And it's unlikely be "Josie." The S sounds are different for a start.

DukkaDukka · 02/11/2021 11:00

Love Theo! Josiah is nice too, to be honest I prefer your second choices. As you said let her have her name and get on with it, and enjoy your lovely family instead.

TheEleventhMonth · 02/11/2021 10:57

.

TatianaBis · 02/11/2021 10:54

Sure, but Josie has never been a dim of Josiah so they’re very unlikely to use that.

All you have to say is ‘Josiah, Jo for short’.

storkstalk · 02/11/2021 10:54

@Awrite

Please call your baby Josiah - it's beautiful.

In the West Wing, President Bartlett was Josiah. Jeb, for short.

I think he was actually Jed rather than Jeb. I think Jed is nicer anwyay
diddl · 02/11/2021 10:52

@TatianaBis

I prefer Josiah to Judah. The dim is Joe not Josie which is dim for Josephine.

Theodore is a bore as there are so many of them.

I think kids will make and use any "dim" that they want.
mistermagpie · 02/11/2021 10:41

Your alternatives are much nicer, I would honestly go with one of them anyway.

But I'm just on to say I know how you feel. Me and SIL were both pregnant at the same time, she was due first. I've got two boys so my 'girls choice' of name was pretty set in stone from those pregnancies, I had loved the name forever. Anyway, SIL has her baby girl and lo and behold, gives her practically the same name - sort of Georgie/Georgina kind of thing, so not the exact same name but close enough that we couldn't use ours. There is a back story to our relationship, of course, but suffice to say we are not close.

Anyway I was gutted but back to the drawing board, didn't even mention it because what's the point? We picked a new name. My daughter is nearly two and is so completely her name that I can't imagine her being called the other name, I'm so glad we ended up calling her what we did, it's perfect.

So pick a new name and I promise that your child will become that name,

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 02/11/2021 10:38

*at the end

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 02/11/2021 10:38

@DifficultBloodyWoman

you don't like the Beatles?
run fast, run far🤣🤣🤣

And the end of the song there's a repetition of "Hey Jude, Jude, Jude, Jude" and that's near impossible to say or sing without the name sounding as "Judy, Judy..."
so I see how that in itself might give the wrong impression.

Antiqueanniesmagiclanternshow · 02/11/2021 10:37

She's done you a favour. Theodore is much nicer

user174793992 · 02/11/2021 10:35

Don’t use Judah it will be changed to Judas in no time Hmm

canyoutoleratethis · 02/11/2021 10:34

@Captainchaos8

Thanks girls, it does make me feel a little better that nearly everyone I speak to prefers our alternatives anyways. As for my sister, she's a bit of a narcissist so if I let her know it's bothered me she will totally feed off that. She's always playing the ' I can do better game' and to be honest I can't be bothered with it anymore. My whole family is pretty toxic and I've had to walk away from them all to preserve my sanity. I'll just let her have the name (not that I have much choice) I have a lovely family and I really should just focus on that. It's not really the name so much but the spiteful intent behind it that hurts. 😭 Thanks for replying, at least I know my feelings are valid, she often gaslight me into thinking I'm oversensitive so I question my own thoughts sometimes!!
OP, you sound amazingly strong and emotionally articulate and I just wanted to post to say how lovely I think you sound!! You’ve been able to recognise your sister’s motivations, and your family’s issues, and have decided against getting drawn into that bullshit. That doesn’t stop what she’s done being incredibly hurtful (your feelings are 100% valid!), but at least you are hopefully able to protect yourself from further damage. I’m unfortunately from a similarly toxic family and it’s taken a great deal of expensive therapy to reach where you are. So definitely rejoice in your own lovely family, and your distinctly better name choices, and leave your sister in her bitter and hateful little world - you refusing to acknowledge her name choice and its impact on you will cause her enormous frustration, so enjoy knowing she’s fuming away while you’re just enjoying your life!! I wish you and your DC the very best Flowers
whatausername · 02/11/2021 10:23

@LittlePearl

I'd stick with Judah if it is your absolute favourite, though the alternatives you mention are nice names. And if your sister has assumed you'd bottle and go for something else you shouldn't give her the satisfaction!

Some members of our extended family have duplicate names all over the place and no one seems bothered.

I completely agree.
TatianaBis · 02/11/2021 10:03

I prefer Josiah to Judah. The dim is Joe not Josie which is dim for Josephine.

Theodore is a bore as there are so many of them.

Phrowzunn · 02/11/2021 08:24

She’s a dick but she did you a favour - Jude/Judah are not nice names.
Josiah on the other hand is lovely (also Elijah, Isiah, Jacob, Isaac)
Theo is nice (not Teddy Envy) but really very popular at the moment so I would avoid that.

SoupDragon · 02/11/2021 08:13

Josiah is likely to get Josie as a nickname

Far more likely to be Joe.