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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Sibling doesn’t like baby’s name - torn!!

90 replies

notactuallylolling · 24/07/2021 09:22

I know this annoys people when the OP doesn’t give specifics but I don’t want everyone to get distracted commenting on the actual name…

We just had a baby girl and picked a name that is pronounced differently in English and in Spanish. OH is Spanish so we opted for his pronunciation. Conscious that this will bring a challenge of telling everyone how to say it but hopefully people will just accept that. It’s not a strange or unique name, at the same time it’s not too popular but it’s nice and simple and I like it. Im not madly in love with it though and that’s probably why I’m torn. Saying that I don’t have another name that I’d prefer….

So we decided to ‘try out’ the name for a couple of days and ended up telling some people (mostly positive reactions). However yesterday her big brother said he really doesn’t like the name and got upset and said he wants us to change it. This really upset me in turn as I have been nervous about how other people would react to her name. Again there isn’t anything weird about it but I’m tired and emotional which won’t be helping!

So to get to the point…..the reason for my post is this….should I just keep the name and a) hope that DS (7) just gets used to it and b) accept that not everyone will take to it immediately/ know how to say it?

Should I consider changing the name? If I change it I will end up picking something that’s just ‘easy’ for everyone to like and say.

Sorry for the ramble but my heads a bit of a mess at the moment!!! X

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pickingdaisies · 28/07/2021 16:03

Beautiful, simple, elegant. People will learn how to say it. Although you'll get occasional batshit pronunciation and/or spelling, it's amazing how many ways even a three letter name can be got wrong.

SleepingStandingUp · 27/07/2021 17:44

I thought it would be Eva. We have two Eva's at my volunteer work. One of each pronunciation (Ev-ah is Polish). She gets called the right name 90% of the time, 5% wrong and corrected and 5% people only see the name badge and dont know better.

He can fond her a nickname.

ValancyRedfern · 27/07/2021 17:40

Love the name Eva with Spanish (also German, Dutch and several other languages) pronunciation. It's beautiful! Most people will hear it before saying it and pronounce accordingly. Glad the issue has resolved itself!

Cindie943811A · 26/07/2021 17:05

Congratulations on the birth of your new daughter OP, a very best wishes for your family’s future

MrsMiddleMother · 26/07/2021 16:04

My Dsd didn't like our son's name to begin with but we told her we love it and when he was born she accepted it and now loves it, its his name. We never would have changed it, unless it was because she couldn't pronounce it or something. But I wouldn't stick with a name you don't love and are going to have to correct all the time.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 26/07/2021 13:13

@BronwenFrideswide

Glad it's all worked out, OPFlowers.

Bizarrre isn't it TatianiaBis, why wouldn't a child with a Spanish parent have a Spanish name pronounced the Spanish way just because they live in England? Should all foreigners who live here start pronouncing their names in some weird English way? Strange attitude.

When I taught ESOL, my name was pronounced in many different ways by my students. I didn’t feel the need to force them to pronounce it the English way.
BronwenFrideswide · 25/07/2021 00:04

Glad it's all worked out, OPFlowers.

Bizarrre isn't it TatianiaBis, why wouldn't a child with a Spanish parent have a Spanish name pronounced the Spanish way just because they live in England? Should all foreigners who live here start pronouncing their names in some weird English way? Strange attitude.

MyDarlingWhatIfYouFly · 24/07/2021 23:45

I know an Eva, pronounced "Ey-va" who has German parents. As far as in know pronunciation has never been an issue - most people hear a name before they see it written down.

TatianaBis · 24/07/2021 23:25

@CloseYourEyesAndSee

It's pretty bonkers to live in the U.K. and deliberately pick a name that will be pronounced wrong all the time...do you think that's fair to her?
This forum has taught me there are still areas of the country where people must know no-one but English people.
Original poster
notactuallylolling · 24/07/2021 23:23

Update - DS has seemingly moved on and is fine with the name. I think this is just a case of me overthinking/ being exhausted and emotional / his being upset at the end of term (always happens) and new baby arriving - all just a bit too much! Thanks for all the advice though!!! Xx

OP posts:
Original poster
notactuallylolling · 24/07/2021 22:55

@BronwenFrideswide - Thankyou! Stupidly I wasn’t worried at all about the boys name I was set on (Javier) - go figure!

OP posts:
KirstenBlest · 24/07/2021 19:51

Eva pronounced the spanish way is nice but the name is very overused at the moment.

Up to you if you want to use it. There are plenty of lovely names that work in Spanish and English.

Ifixfastjets · 24/07/2021 19:47

Why does ds not like the name?
Just being a kid? Will he love it next week?
Class bully with the same name?
I guess that might influence my thoughts.

BronwenFrideswide · 24/07/2021 19:46

You'll be fine OP, it'll be fine OP, just give people the correct Spanish pronunciation when you introduce your daughter, if they need a reference say as in Eva Peron. Sounds much nicer pronounced the correct Spanish way as it would being Spanish name, as others have pointed out the correct English version is actually Eve, so those using Eva and pronouncing it in an English way are actually mangling it, dread to think what monstrosity they'd come up with for Juanita.

CrouchEndTiger12 · 24/07/2021 17:57

7 year olds change their mind all the time about things they like and don't like.

Is it possible he is nervous about the babys arrival and is just saying he doesn't like it

Ju11tne · 24/07/2021 17:57

There's always someone who won't like a particular name. It's the same for usual names until they become a trend.

As others have said OP... your child is 7.

Original poster
notactuallylolling · 24/07/2021 17:54

Spot on @woodfort

OP posts:
Original poster
notactuallylolling · 24/07/2021 17:54

@KirstenBlest I appreciate that but I really wasn’t looking for feedback on the name, just on the situation (which honestly I seem to have constructed entirely in my own head!)

OP posts:
Original poster
notactuallylolling · 24/07/2021 17:53

@EllaBlaire no I do not. As I said, I just had a baby and I am tired and hormonal. Cheers for the sarcasm though. Thread wouldn’t be complete without it.

OP posts:
Els1e · 24/07/2021 15:26

Eva is a lovely name. Ignore my earlier comment. Ee or Eh is not that complex a change. Another neighbour (as you might guess I spend a lot of time nattering) had a second girl and said to dd1, age 5, she could help choose the name. Dd1 chose Cassidy after her best friend at school. Neighbour and her dh thought well this isn’t a name we thought of but quite like it. All good until dd1 fell out with best friend and wanted 4 month old dd2 changed to Simon after her new best friend. 🤣

ShrinkingViolet9 · 24/07/2021 14:43

@Imissmoominmama

I think letting him have a say (within reason) will help him bond with his sister, and as you say, you aren’t completely sold on the name.

If you decide you’re going to change it, I’d let him feel like he’s part of the process.

I wouldn't give him a say in his new sister's first name. But if you are considering adding a middle name, then I might involve him in making suggestions for a middle name.
BertieBotts · 24/07/2021 14:39

Don't worry about the pronunciation, it can be quite useful for bilingual DC to have a marker like that! If someone calls her Ee-va then she knows they will speak English and when someone calls her Ey-va she knows they will speak Spanish.

CaffiSaliMali · 24/07/2021 14:33

Eva pronounced Ava isn't particularly unusual - Eva is usually pronounced like Ava on the continent.

Eva pronounced Ever is a bit more unusual, although similar to the Welsh name Efa.

Either pronunciation, you will have to correct it initially. Also bear in mind that she may choose to pronounce it Eeva when speaking English and Ever/Ava in Spanish.

I know a few bilingual people who use a French/Italian etc. pronunciation when speaking french/italian and an English one when speaking English.

KirstenBlest · 24/07/2021 14:31

It's a name I don't like and I don't Ava either.

It's a name that is overpopular and most of the other Evas will be Eevas, so will be a PITA.

Imissmoominmama · 24/07/2021 14:30

I think letting him have a say (within reason) will help him bond with his sister, and as you say, you aren’t completely sold on the name.

If you decide you’re going to change it, I’d let him feel like he’s part of the process.