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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

I cannot warm to DH's favourite name

140 replies

BertieBotts · 18/06/2021 19:21

Expecting DS3 in the summer. It took us months and months to come up with DS2's name (Leo) and in the end it was the only one we both liked. DS1 is from a previous relationship and apparently it's easier to name a baby when you're only 19. I do not remember having such strong opinions...

Anyway, since we still can't find a name DH reckons we should just take a list into hospital and see what he looks like when he gets here. I'm OK with that plan. But DH has absolutely and totally fallen in love with Niko/Nikolas.

I don't like it! I want to like it because he loves it so much, but I don't. The K is too spiky. I don't like the way it rhymes with Leo. I have tried to imagine a baby Niko (Nico is better but I don't even really like that, and anyway DH particularly likes the K) and it doesn't feel like my child.

I on the other hand am getting more and more attached to Alex/Alexander. DH doesn't hate Alex, but he doesn't love it and is hesitant because we know people called Alex, and I keep reading about how choosing a name you feel differently about each is a really bad idea.

But the thing is, Alex was never my favourite name to begin with! I just suggested it half jokingly as the only one we'll be able to agree on. My favourite names are Lars or Idris. DH is not keen on either of them. So I leant back towards Alex, and the more I think about it the more I like it. It's a cute name for a baby/child, but a sensible/nice name for a grown up. Every Alex I've ever met has been a nice, quiet, kind, clever boy/man.

The other names I like are:

Max (DH says it feels like a dog's name to him)
Rory (Might be tricky with locals - we live in Germany)
Jupiter (I think we both feel this is a bit too much)
Alfred (Alfie/Freddie) - DH says too old man and doesn't like Fred, although Alfie is OK.
Owen - both feel a bit meh.

DH's list:
Lucas (It's OK, but boring/bland to me)
Miles (Don't like)
Chase (Kind of like, but feels v American and not comfortable)
Hal (Just no)
Oliver (Too stuffy)
Peter (Too old)

What happens if we go in with a list and we still feel the same about all the names and we can't agree?? :o Confused

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Original poster
BertieBotts · 19/06/2021 20:37

Robin was actually the only other one we agreed on for DS2 but then DH went off it at the end. I think it is a bit too close to DS1's name anyway. It's not disastrous but I went a bit meh on it as well. But I do like it better than some other names.

It doesn't really matter if the name is German or not but it would have to either be a recognisable German name or a recognisable English name, and gender neutral names are not allowed (but you can have a gender neutral first name and add a middle name that is recognisable as the child's sex). You can't have made up names, or names which are surnames unless they are already established as first names. So if we went for anything too weird we'd have to somehow get proof that it's a real name, which is normally done through the consulate.

O ending is OK but I don't like Otto or Milo.

I am way too picky and defo have the "name ick" problem someone else started a thread about today :o

OP posts:
TheRebelle · 19/06/2021 20:36

Out of all the names you’ve listed I’d say Alexander is the nicest by a long long long way.

MitheringSunday · 19/06/2021 20:31

Tobias (pronounced Tobeeas) is pretty common in Germany, so I get where OP's dh is coming from.

MitheringSunday · 19/06/2021 20:28

How about Robin?

For whoever suggested a Nordic god, that would be read in Germany as the family being of an extreme right-wing persuasion.

It's probably more culturally usual in Germany for children not to have a 'German' name (old man/lady chic aside).

James is also a bad idea because it would inevitably become Chamesss.

Overall, though, I don't think you can go far wrong with Alex, and (controversially, perhaps) I also don't think you necessarily have to 'love' a name to give your child it. If you like it well enough, it will grow to be 'them' and you'll come to love it that way.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 19/06/2021 20:16

@SummerHouse

James

Just look at it. It's classic and beautiful and nobody could disagree.

@SummerHouse

it's OP's ex's name and already used for her DS1"s middle name.

occasionally it's worth reading all of the OP's posts😉

SummerHouse · 19/06/2021 20:12

James

Just look at it. It's classic and beautiful and nobody could disagree.

FedUpAtHomeTroels · 19/06/2021 20:06

I've always like Dimitri, Leif and Nels.

Georgyporky · 19/06/2021 19:47

There used to be an advert for a soft drink with the logo :-
"I drink Idris when I's dry"

willieversleep · 19/06/2021 19:46

I don't know why but I thought of Micah when I saw your list.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 19/06/2021 19:39

@B0YS

It’s hard naming your third boy Grin we also struggled & waited until he was born. Good luck Flowers
@BOYS

it's even harder to name your 6th!🤣
especially when their cousins have gorgeous names you'd love to have but can't because of same surname!

Talkwhilstyouwalk · 19/06/2021 19:36

How about Tobias shortened to Toby?

drpet49 · 19/06/2021 19:35

* I prefer Lucian to Lucas*

^Another vote for Lucian

MargosKaftan · 19/06/2021 19:33

A know a few little Tobys so it doesn't seem too german.

Oliver could be Ollie, in fact all the little Olivers I know are Ollies.

It does seem hard to suggest names as you seem to swing between traditional names and more modern sounding ones on both your lists.

My ideas:
Anthony/Tony
Dylan
Milo/Mylo
Otto (or are "o" ending names no good?)
Oscar
Jake (Jacob)
Edward /Teddy
Nathan/Nate

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 19/06/2021 19:33

congrats on DS3 @BertieBotts!

definitely don't choose a first name that one of you dislikes. that's a hard no.

depending on where you live you have 6 weeks to register the birth and you can always ask for an extension if you really can't agree on a name.
you probably know this already, so just a reminder that you can wait until after the birth to decide!

RickiTarr · 19/06/2021 19:26

Trying to think of names that fall between the two lists somehow (but it’s so subjective), how about:-

Leif
Silas
Alec
Jude
Eric
Milo
Kai
Ethan
Art/hur
Seth
Adam

ladygindiva · 19/06/2021 19:17

Tobias is fab and doesn't strike me as German at all.

Dollywilde · 19/06/2021 19:14

I’m not an Alexander fan but love Alexei, I think because I knew an insanely hot guy with that name Blush

NiceGerbil · 19/06/2021 19:12

Just looked at their top ten it's pretty varied!

Maximilian is cool if you go Max. I know one, it's a real talking point.

I used to know a Jorg (can't do accent) and he was lovely and it's a satisfying name to say somehow!

NiceGerbil · 19/06/2021 19:09

Hal is a murderous computer to me!

Are you going to stay in Germany? Culturally is it usual or quite unusual to not have a German name?

I'd look at that tbh.

The norms and tastes may be different.

TooTiredForToday · 19/06/2021 18:16

DS is at nursery with an Aleksei which has really grown on me.

Tobias is lovely, I don't see that as too German.

Sasha is on our girls list Blush

Happenchance · 19/06/2021 18:05

How about:
Alexi
Jovian (Means Jupiter)
Sal (I like this but not Hal Confused)
Jakobi
Kristoph
Erik
Henry nn Hank

MrsMime · 19/06/2021 15:04

Oscar/Oskar?

Juanbablo · 19/06/2021 14:59

Kristian sorry.

Juanbablo · 19/06/2021 14:57

Our dog is called Nico so I don't think that might help your argument against it. Our son is Rory and we almost moved to Germany and knew it would be quite difficult for locals to say.

How about Kristin if Dh likes the K sound in names?

TimeIhadaNameChange · 19/06/2021 14:52

Alec / Sandy as an alternative for Alex?

I love Merlin but I doubt many others do.