Is this double barrel cruel?!

I also think the double Mc sounds cool.

My daughter has 24 letters in her name. No issues. One of her classmates has seven letters. I'm sure it took my daughter longer to learn to write her name but it's not a problem.

I think the double-barrel with both Mcs sounds quite cool.

What about McKinley-Dade? Just drop one of the Mc's?

Do it. It's not like you say the full name out loud a lot.
The baby should be equally part of both of your families.

If it is only going to be one surname it should be the mother's as 50% of DCs don't live with their bio father's by the time they are 16.

I would drop on of the 'mc's or even both, make the name double barrelled to be a part of both of you...but then I would change mine and DH's to the new surname too. Cool, one new exciting family name that doesn't belong to one person or side of the family any more than the other.

drop one of the Mc’s. So McKinley-Dade or McDade-Kinley. Both are nice, prefer the first one

Trending Today It is awful, glad you refused. I had a child in my class 24 letters in his name and his Mother could not understand why her son was struggling to learn to spell his name.

No crueler than, for example, Katarina Johnson-Thompson and she seems to have done pretty well.

I know a DC with a hyphenated first name and surname. Think something along the lines of Savannah-Mae Burton-Webster (same syllable count, not real name) I always figured it would be good if you needed an alias. You could be Savannah Burton one day and Mae Webster the next and they’d both be your name. I mean, options are rarely a bad thing.

@C152

Be aware that, whenever you travel overseas (whenever it's allowed again!), you'll probably be asked at border control for the child's birth certificate every single time, as their name will be different to both yours and your husband's name.

My kids are double barrelled and we have taken them abroad about 50 times and this has literally never happened even once.

I've heard that said lots of times but we've never been asked both when travelling as a family or a solo adult with the children.

I've been asked more than once. I do travel on a different country's passport than DD though. It probably looks a bit 'kidnappy'.

Both DH and I have travelled alone with them from when they were young. Border control seemed to be able to recognise that the hyphenated surname included the surname of whichever parent (or both) that was travelling.

Because if work and family and other circumstances we were backwards and forwards through airports all the time.

Perfectly fine.

It's a person's name, not a fashion contest. It reflects the reality of his/her parentage. How can it be cruel??

Timpeall

If you're referring to (people like) me, that's exactly what I said: that something has to give. You're just kicking the can further down the road and leaving it for somebody else to have to pick it up later. Granted, it's nowhere of the same magnitude of two acrimoniously-divorced parents both refusing to attend their child's wedding "if s/he is there"; but it's still likely putting them in a very difficult situation further down the line. Even if they keep their own names and don't multi-barrel when they marry, when the first baby is born and parents Mr Johnson-Thompson and Miss/Ms Wilkinson-Davies decide that four surnames (or even just three, if only one parent is double-barrelled) would sound ridiculous - bearing in mind that the names almost certainly came from mother and father for each, they have to either dump the names of both parents of one of them and keep both names of the other, or otherwise each potentially upset (or 'dishonour the memory of') one parent by dropping their one surname.

In the case of a couple where only one of them is double-barrelled, and the couple decide to compact their names down into a new double-barrel, it's probably even more acutely awkward, as it then means that three of the grandparents' surnames are passed down to the new baby whilst only one grandparent's name is omitted. Unless they completely disregard all hitherto names and make up a completely new one that bears no similarity.

I'm genuinely interested to know how people go about deciding which name(s) to use in these situations.

I have a hyphened first name and a O' maiden name. Would not have double barrelled my daughters first or last name.

What do people seriously think happens when two double-barreled people meet, fuck, fall in love and marry?

That they end up with a quadruple-barrel name? Possible but highly unlikely I'd say. Wouldn't you?

Names do not need to be static things.

Shocking.

And they get in a proper tailspin when they try to imagine two double-barreled people marrying.

It's just mathematical fact, though: unless you're willing for the third generation to potentially have 16 surnames, something somewhere along the line has to give.

Drop the McKinley and replace with Jarvis - baby's full name: Jack Victor (or Jacqui Victoria) Jarvis-McDade

I think it sounds pretty cool, OP. But MN is full of people who think that unless all members of a family have the same surname (preferably the husband's) then they're not a team. Or a unit. Something like that.

And they get in a proper tailspin when they try to imagine two double-barreled people marrying.

Sorry OP, I think it sounds clunky and cumbersome. Full disclosure I'm not a big fan of double barrelled names anyway but that really is a lot.
I also don't understand what the plan is longer term when parents double barrel their children's names. When they get married and have children whose names should be used? Clearly you can't just keep adding on.

Ooh, please call the kid McKenzie Macauley McKinley-Mcdaid 🤣

Drop a Mc, or both. You don’t need the hyphen, just two surnames.

I think it is incredibly cumbersome at best!

I have a child in my class (Year 2), with a 7 syllable double barrelled surname, and her parents INSIST that she has it written on everything and that we use it in its full form. This poor child has SEND so really struggles to write/spell this name (she struggles writing her 4 syllable first name!) so the whole name is completely impossible for her to try to copy down, write or spell. I feel so bad for her when I say (many times a day!!) 'Make sure you've written your name on the back before you hand it in!' (Obviously I always ensure that I go over and quietly support her with this, but still 🤦‍♀️)

So no, please don't do this OP!