Please help me choose a favourite boy name

Ignore your step son OP. I like Kasper but do prefer it spelt Casper. Finley would definitely be my favourite! I don't mind Arthur but I don't like it as much as the other two.

Some names ideas:
Caspian, Archer, Flynn, Seth & Harlan.

Casper is a great name - not his choice!! (also prefer the C spelling)

Arthur and Finley are both great names too - Finley (nn Finn) was really popular when ds was born so we didn't consider it - but it's less top ten now and is still a great name IMO.

Caspar. It's cool af

Arthur

Agree with everyone else.

I told my mother my chosen name, at her request, on the condition that she express no opinion about it. One hour later she tried to convince me to change it. When we went to visit (baby was 3 months old) she refused to call him by his name.

Quite frankly I'll never forgive her for her attitude (she didn't have to like the name but she did have to shut up about it). And I'll never let her forget it either. Even when she probably denies it in years to come.

If anyone's curious the name was a top 100 name in my country, not some outlandish invention.

My point is, you're picking the name, not your stepson.

If his reaction was a convenient way for your OH to broach the fact that he isn't actually sold on that name, of course you should discuss it, but that's a completely different issue than your stepson not liking it.

For what it's worth I love Kasper though I do prefer Kaspar.

Kasper was our top boys name but we had a little girl. I love it!

Kasper - love it!

Please ignore the adult stepson and go with your initial name!!

I actually find it quite hard to believe that a 21 year old young man actually has any real opinion on baby names, and I've an uncomfortable feeling that the rudeness would quite probably have happened no matter WHAT the name was - it's probably the case that he has mixed feelings about the baby/his place in everything/having such a younger sibling and is bristling slightly.

So don't change it - it sends the wrong message - and imagine your upset if you change it, and his reaction to the birth announcement is 'God, even Kasper was better than THAT!' - which I actually think is pretty likely.

Smile, say nothing, call your baby what you want - it'll be far more damaging long term to always resent that he took your choice away from you. Ultimately he really won't care what this baby is called.

I would ignore the views of the adult stepson. It would be reasonable to change the name if he was 6 and the name you chose was the same name as his school bully for example. That's not the case here, he just doesn't like the name.

Although if DH won't agree to it you'll need to find something else and make sure that the new name isn't mentioned to anyone in advance, including your stepson. Otherwise you might find DH agreeing to names, running them past DSS and then changing his mind again.

I prefer Arthur to Finley if you don't go with Kasper.

If they were a child who perhaps needed to feel included and not replaced by a new sibling, I would say consider their feelings. Your stepson is just a rude adult. Kasper is a great name.

Yep, always a risk sharing name ideas with family... personally I always kept the name quiet until baby was born. That way everyone had to just accept it.

It's such hard work choosing a name that everyone 'likes'. My son is due next month and I told DP not to tell anyone our name choice but he told his entire family and all his friends so I felt like I had to tell my kids before someone else did (when they asked) and then my mum cornered me and I had to tell her because EVERYONE else knew. And she hated it. So now we have to find a new one 😬

Finley.

Casper or Caspar are much nicer spellings in my opinion. I do like the name though.

Agree about changing Kasper's spelling (unless it fits your nationality). It will get misspelled anyway but Casper is the most common version in the UK (although I admit I like Caspar myself). Arthur is nice and traditional but too popular for my taste and Finley too surname/trendy for me.

I like Kasper, but I’d spell it Casper or Caspar.

I like Kasper the best by far. It’s not a particularly common name, but by today’s standards, it’s certainly not in any way outrageous or bonkers. Don’t let a rude family member make you doubt yourself. It’s absolutely nothing to do with your stepson. If you shared the same taste in all things as a twenty one year old lad, you’d probably be a very odd woman!

I prefer Casper.

Personally I think Finley is the best and trendy. Arthur is old and Kasper reminds me of the ghost

Agree with @BackforGood about the spelling.

How about Cassian?

Are you East European ?
I'm just wondering about Kasper, rather than Casper ?

I mean I'm not keen on it, but no real reason (other than the friendly ghost), but if you were going to use it, I'd spell it Casper unless you are from a heritage that usually spells it Kasper.

I (personally) find Arthur old fashioned, BUT, 'old fashioned names' have come round again and it fits with the Stanleys and Elsies and Ivys that are being named at the moment.

My personal preference of the three is Finley.

He's 21 , he has no idea of current trends. He'd probably be shocked at top 100 names like Hunter, Albert, Arlo and Albie. I bet he'd laugh at loads of the names that are popular now because he's not used to them.

Don't worry.

Kasper is a lovely name and I honestly wouldn't raise an eyebrow about it at all these days. Stick with it. Your other options are lovely too but Kasper is more interesting

Kasper.

When I saw the title, I got a feeling you'd like Kasper and then saw it was on your list! It's a sign ;)

Probably Arthur from your list, but be aware it’s very popular. More suggestions;
Jonah
Barnaby (Barney)
Jamie
Scott
Elliott