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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Last minute name doubts

38 replies

kellybean18 · 17/08/2020 22:59

Expecting DC2 in a week and having doubts about the name I have agreed with my DH. I have had quite a tough pregnancy and we chose it quite early on, so I don’t know if it’s just taken on those associations.

I’m now leaning towards a name I’ve always loved instead. DH is reluctant to change it.

Any advice on this much appreciated.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Nsky · 17/08/2020 23:39

Just be careful with names, I have one folk used to get wrong frequently.
Try and get it to match your surname

Tavannach · 17/08/2020 23:27

You don't have to excuse the fact that you longer love the name. You don't and that's that. You have to find a name that works for both of you. And, really, the final say is yours.

oldstripeyNEWname1 · 17/08/2020 23:22

I never understand why people get so fixated on a name before child is born. Honestly, wait, have a look at her and then you'll see what we mean!
Even worse is looking back at baby name books and lists on baby 2 and seeing what you thought about for baby 1. I remember telling DH 'omg, what were we thinking!!!! At least I can blame hormones!' With baby 3, we actually road tested some of the names on kids 1 and 2. One of my faves got rejected by DH because Kids couldn't say it. 'Hugh' Who? No, Hugh, you know hoooyou' 'who hoowooo.'

FizzyGreenWater · 17/08/2020 23:17

OP, really sounds like you need to post the name, post names you like and the style your H likes, and let folk here possibly give you some option ideas.

kellybean18 · 17/08/2020 23:13

@LittleBearPad I think it’s more that the name conversations got exhausting. Essentially we have quite different tastes and ideas and I think we were just so relieved to find something we both ‘liked’ but I’m not sure either of us love it if that makes sense.

I feel like it could be a meaningful middle name now since we referred to her as that for so long. I just have had such a crap few months and I don’t want it to be a lasting reminder of that I guess...

OP posts:
FizzyGreenWater · 17/08/2020 23:13

Question I always ask - is the baby going to have his surname / is your family name from his side of the family (ie you took his too?)

If so - you get the casting vote. That's it.

Change it, really. Or rather, just don't agree to keeping with the old one and find a new name.

If you are willing to post the names, you'll get some very honest answers on how both are perceived, if that might help.

Blossomorange · 17/08/2020 23:12

You’re the one giving birth and going through it all - milk it for all it’s worth, including naming rights!

LittleBearPad · 17/08/2020 23:10

Neither of mine are called what we thought they would be.

Is he usually so inflexible.

kellybean18 · 17/08/2020 23:07

@IWantT0BreakFree thank you this is what I have needed to hear. We made the mistake of telling close family as well but I don’t want that being the reason we stick with something so permanent.

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IWantT0BreakFree · 17/08/2020 23:05

We changed our minds late on. We were stuck on a name all the way through pregnancy, and then when she was born we just thought she suited another name (that we’d discussed early days) better so we switched to that.

It’s fine to change your mind. Your husband can’t unilaterally decide the baby’s name at this point any more than he could have chosen it by himself earlier. It’s not a legally binding contract set in stone for all eternity. If you no longer like the name then you need to find another one that you both like.

SunnySummerDays · 17/08/2020 23:04

It’s not concrete until registered?
My little boy was going to be jack. Looked nothing like a jack and was nameless for a week!

kellybean18 · 17/08/2020 23:02

@LittleBearPad would I be unreasonable to try and put my foot down if DH is really against changing it?

The ridiculous thing is baby isn’t here yet so I’ve tried making the point it’s not really a ‘change’. I’ve suggested keeping it as a middle as well :/

OP posts:
LittleBearPad · 17/08/2020 23:01

Wait until they are born and decide then. They may not look like name 1 or 2