Dilemma- Alexander and Alexandra favourite names

I would use Alexandra. It's not unusual to change your mind and choose different names for a second pregnancy. I didn't use the boys name I would have used for my daughter, when my son was born.

I know a father/daughter Alexander/Alexandra.

They are Sandy and Lexi...I'd known them about 18 months before I twigged they had more or less the same name!

If your daughter ends up being known as Alex or Andi, you could always have an Alexander shortened to Xander or Sandy.

Go with Alexandra now, you never know what the future holds. We 'planned' on 3 DC but life intervened and I now can't have any more kids so we only have the 1. Choose the name you love now.

I agree, once you have a child you are hearing names in the context of other small children and it can change your feelings about them. We had a lot of difficulty finding the right girl's name because ones I thought were nice my partner found pretentious or odd (or sometimes both), and ones he liked had been spoiled for me by horrible girls in primary school. Had we had a second daughter it might have been easier to find suitable names that felt right to both of us. (though, come to think of it, I don't recall planning a girl's name before our son was born! He got the name that had always felt right for a boy even before his big sister was born ...)

It didn't help us that several initials (A, I, even P) work very badly with our surname, thus ruling out loads of great names before we started.

I would also say that once I had DC1 then I heard a lot of "new" names at baby groups, toddler groups, pre-school, etc... obviously not always new names, but ones I hadn't thought of or hadn't properly considered. Some old-fashioned names which were actually sounding cool again, or some slightly more obscure names - stuff like that. You will probably hear a lot more possibilities before DC2 is on the horizon, and may find DC2's name among them.

Totally agree that you should use the name you both like most on this baby. Who knows what the future will bring? You might in the end decide one child is enough, or you might struggle to conceive again, or your second child might be another daughter! By the time any hypothetical brother comes along you'll have found another name you both like, I'm sure. Good luck!

I'm really sorry if I'm wrong but am I right to infer that you are a same-sex couple?

When my sister and her DW had their children they each carried one, and had the final say on the name for the child that they carried. Your partner is heavily pregnant in a heatwave. Give her the casting vote!

Go with Alexandra (excellent name) dc2 might never exist or might be a girl. Name the child you have and I'm sure you'll find a lovely name for a son if you have him down the road.

If you love it then use it now.

You don't know for sure, but you may not end up having a son or even a second child (sorry, I don't mean to be depressing, but nobody knows the future). Using a name you consider "second best" now would be a mistake.

Name the child you are carrying as well as you can. Sometimes you have to make sub optimal decisions for your children to benefit their siblings, but as one of the first and most enduring decisions you will make for your daughter, please do the best you can. This is not the time for her to be playing second fiddle to a hypothetical brother.

Alexandra is a beautiful name. I would use it for the baby which you are expecting

Use the name that you love for the baby who is (nearly) here now. Worry about naming any future children when they come along. You’ll kick yourself even harder if you don’t end up using either of your favourite names.

You don’t say what your partner thinks of your girls’ top three. As the person carrying the child, and as you are so torn, perhaps she should get the casting vote.

If I was in your position I'd do the same as you and keep the name for my second child.
Now as a parent with one dc and secondary infertility with next to no chance of a second child I'd say to give the name to your first child because as cliché as it sounds, you don't know what the future holds.

Wtf does this have to do with trans people?

What are your other names on the list? I have to say, I don't love Alexandra. I'm just not sold on Alex for a girl, there's something a bit depressing about it. Very 80s. It's lovely as a long name but just a bit too long.

Alexandra is an excellent name.... I may be biased here though.

I go by Alex and personally I like that it's a gender neutral nickname, (just seems to be my preference for girl's names)

I've been called Lex, Lexie, Al, Allie and another variation I absolutely hate and was called all the way through childhood won't say because (I can't believe I'm about to say this I've become such a MN cliche) it's incredibly outing by various people at various times.

Honestly if you use one of them for this baby then even if the next is of the opposite sex I imagine it wouldn't even cross your mind that you will wish you'd "saved" it as the name will so thoroughly belong to the one you already have :)

Personally I think I'd use Alexandra as a middle name and keep Alexander in reserve, as there aren't any other boy names I like nearly as much. I don't know what I'd have done if I'd had a DS2!

You do know that the baby may very well be born and you will look at his cute little face and say... ‘horario!’.

Maybe your first baby gets the Alex as a first and the next opposite sex baby gets it as a middle name. You might only have one after all.

Use it this time (as long as your other half agrees of course) as if you save it you'll regret it if a second DD doesn't come along.

Acually I shouldn't really say that as I took the same gamble. DS1 didn't look like my favourite name so we called him something else. We were lucky that DS2 came along next as it was perfect for him so got to use it after all.

go for what you like now because you don't know what lies ahead

Choose the name you love the most 🙂

Worry about naming the next child when the time comes! I'm sure you will have another name you love just at much by then.

I’d use it this time. You might intend to have another child and very well
might but there are no guarantees.

I like Alexandra more than Alexander today, so on that basis you should call your baby Alexandra.

Having said that, every Alexandra I've ever known has been called Alex.

If you had another girl you could still use Alexandra.

Have a look at your baby when she's born and see what name suits her.