Can't shake name regret of my 4 year old

Lily is a beautiful name and while popular, it’s not the most common name where I live.

My friend called her daughter Poppy. Like you she hadn’t realised how popular it was and thought it had a lovely 1930s feel. There are three girls with the same name in her class. I still love the name, but she is devastated.

I always remember starting work and a lady having a melt down because a character on eastEnders named their child the same name as her Two year old. She was actually sobbing. I think the name was Courtney. It’s still a lovely name, it just became a not more popular.

Lily is a beautiful name. I rarely hear it myself unless it's double barrelled - there are lots of Lilli-Mae's around here for example.

The name on its own and your spelling is lovely.

The only Lily I know is in her 80's, a lovely lady who sadly has Alzheimer's. We have a lot of children in our family and Lily doesn't even feature as a middle name. It is a lovely name and thankfully it hasn't been ruined by a stupid spelling in my experience.

She is four, its too late to change it now. Lily is such a beautiful name. I only know of one lily in my children's primary school. So it's not that popular everywhere.

If it helps, I too had baby name regret with my second. I chose unusual names for both my children. But because I didn't get many compliments on the youngests name, I immediately felt sick to think that I'd saddled her with this horrible name. Now she is nearing 7, I couldn't imagine her as another name. She loves her name and says that she loves being the only x at her school. I purposely gave them both plain middle names, in case they hated their first names when they grow up. OP the regret will fade.

You never know what will happen, my youngest is a very popular name but she’s the only one in her nursery across the different rooms.

My oldest I thought was less common but when I took her for her 5 day check, the midwife remarked that she’d never met a ‘t’ before this year but had seen 3 girls in the last 6 months called it.

We’re influenced sometimes and we don’t know it.

Lily is a lovely name. Please don't be disappointed in your classic choice.
My name dates me to 3-4 years in the late 1950s/ early 1960s - virtually none before and even fewer since. In primary I was one of 3 and at secondary I was one of 5, with the same name in the same class. In primary we all had the same first letter for our surname as well, so known as full name, first and surname throughout primary school. However since leaving school I have never been in the same course, at college, university or any work place as another person with my name. Never.

We chose what we thought was an unusual name for DD - 5 in her class at secondary. Now at uni and work - she knows no one with her name.
School seems to be the bottle neck, once your little girl has grown and her social circle grows, there will be proportionately fewer Lilys for her to worry about.

That's just a sneaky attempt to change a perfectly nice name for no good reason. It's a person, not a hamster.

Ps. I don’t know any Lily’s. It’s much less popular than it used to be

I think I’ll DM you about this OP as I am completely in the same boat.

One suggestion to think about - could you give her a second middle name - one of the names you loved but didn’t pick? I know you said her one middle name isn’t really an option for a serious first name so how about just adding another middle name? And you could call her that new middle name occasionally as a sort of nickname - and if in 5-10 years she prefers her “new” middle name then she can use it.
Once you look out for it, you realise how many people choose to go by middle names
Meghan Markle, Boris Johnson, Jude Law. These first names are all actually middle names!

Hi I understand where your coming from I'm having a baby girl now after three boys and trying to think of an original name is so hard as all the pretty ones are popular.
I adore the name lily I even considered it for my daughter but I know a couple and so that's made me not choose lily. It's a family name for us and my nans we're both called lily so I will definitely be using it as a middle name.
I really think you need to stop overthinking it I don't think it's as popular now and Ava Olivia and Isla I hear of way more these days.
My two younger sons have really popular top ten names but I love their names their old fashioned and classy and I've never regretted their names because I love them and that's the important thing here.

My name is not common or uncommon but I don't care for it but I don't think about it and neither will your daughter lily is a lovely name

Well at least it’s a nice name even if it is very popular.

I still had big name regret when my DD was 4. She was also almost Alice - which was my Gran's name which made me feel equally terrible. At the time I wasn't quite myself and was sort of talked into DH's choice. But you know what? At 10 she just IS her name and she seems to really like it.

FWIW I really like the name Lily. I think it's a similar sort of name to Alice. It's really pretty. Even though it's popular, I never ruled it out for the third child I didn't have despite its popularity. My son is one of many of his name (two in his class) and it's never bothered me at all.

I did regret my daughter's name, Phoebe, when she started playgroup and suddenly everyone seemed to be called Phoebe. There were two in her class of 30 in a single class school and one in the year below. Prior to that there had been none in the school for at least a decade!

It has passed though and she most definitely suits her name.

Lily is a lovely name.

Lily is ageless and timeless. I know a 20 something Lily and some toddler Lily’s and my late DGM was a Lily. My DGDs nickname is Lily and her real name is nothing like Lily but it suits her. Please try not to worry. Names are so difficult. I’ve always adored DDs name but she doesn’t like it at all 🤷🏽‍♀️.

I think Lily is a lovely name too. By the time she is 16 like my daughter she probably won't like it anyway so what is the point stressing? 😬

DH named DD (a fairly uncommon in the UK female version of a male name) because he loved it and I didnt love anything more. Its still not a name I would have chosen but its her name (coupled with the fact she insists on a unusual spelling of the nickname)

I was going to name DS but then DD loved a name she was adamant her brother was going to be called. He too loves his name.

It is her name now though. DD owns her name in a way that I was not expecting. She is Lily you cant change it

I get it OP I have a 7yr old Leo and I've always had a little guilty niggling of name regret because it's SO popular. At the time I didn't know any Leo's seriously and I even work with kids but the name is everywhere now - books, shows, there are 3 in his after school care room. I just tell him it's because it's so nice and try to remember that names are for life not just primary school. Now my other sons name is leaping in popularity too and it was in the hundreds in terms of popularity - so I guess you never know.

Lily is a beautiful and classic name. It will not tarnish or mark her of a certain generation. I say that as a person with a very cliche 70s name

It's a beautiful name and I actually don't know any and spend a lot of time with young children. On the other hand I know a million Evies and Olivias. I don't think I would choose my 4 year old's name again but it is his and it suits him and I just remind myself that at the time it was the one we decided for him. I probably wouldn't have chosen it if I was a single mum but I really liked it and my dh loved it so it was a compromise. Lily is classic and will age really well.

Fwiw, I had a wobble over my daughter's name when she was in her twenties, maybe early 30's! Then I realised 1. I'd chosen what I thought was right at the time (and always liked) and 2. It actually really does suit her and always has. She shortens it, and has never said anything about not liking it. Plus she's the sort of person who would change it if she didn't like it, so no worries! I've never mentioned it either.

I sympathise, I have 4 kids, I chose a name for eldest. I had always wanted to use that name and loved it then and love it now. DH wasn't that keen but went with it as it meant so much to me. So we had a second and he wanted a name I wasn't so keen on but in the spirit of give and take we went with it. It hasn't grown on me, in fact 40 years later I hate it. He chose a name, or maybe his friends did, when he was 11 and it has stuck, we all use that name now. Child 3 came along and we agreed on a name, we both wanted the same name so no argument there. She got to 14 and adopted an unusual shortening of her name. I think it is a shame as her name is beautiful but that is what everyone calls her and it has grown on me. We agreed on child4's name, as soon as he was old enough he told us he hated it and as soon as he was 18 he was going to change it, told us that all through his childhood, got to 18 and decided it was fine.

Names are weird and all I can say is Lily will either love her name, which is beautiful, or one day she will decide she wants to be known as Ninja Princess or something and you will look back and think, "Lily was such a lovely name."

I agree, you can't change her name now she is four. You could opt for a variation on Lily as a differianting nickname though? I think that Lily is a beautiful name.

I have a very unusual name (which I hated growing up). When I was born there were only 6 other people in the UK with that name - my mum worked for national stats at the time!!
Now I hear the name more often with different variations of pronounciation and spelling! I don't think you can avoid having the same name

Lily is a popular name because it's lovely.

Agree with giving her a less usual "full name" like Lillian, Elisabeth, Lilliana if you want her to have options later.

I was going to suggest the same as Twaddle! Come up with a beautiful longer name which can have "Lily" as a nickname. It doesn't even need to make much sense as a nickname - after all, Peggy and Daisy are "short for" Margaret, Harry's "short for" Henry, Jack's "short for" John, etc.

I urge you to pick "Lilith" - SUCH a kickass name. If you don't know, legendarily she was Adam's first wife who was kicked out of Eden for being recalcitrant and sexy, or something. Waterhouse did an amazing painting of her, and I love this one by Collier.

It's lovely, classic and will never date.

I love it, OP.