How did you pick your child's middle name?

DS has my late Dad's name as a middle name.

My son’s middle name is Jack..... after a pumpkin (jack o’lantern). There’s a strange but personal story behind it!

Just wanted to say LOVE the name Violet @bb2605

My son has my dads name in his memory. This one will have my husbands mums name in her memory.

It is my amazing step-dad's name. Also happens to be my husband's too.

DC1 has his dads and Grandads first name as his middle name and DC2 has a different variation of it

Had one family name we could/wanted to use but only went with our second name choice. Our Ds wanted to call DD 'Flo' so we comprised and used Florence as her middle name instead

DD's middle name is my DH's nan's nickname. Her proper name was unusual and not to my taste, but she was known predominantly by a nickname which we both liked. As luck would have it, it's also the gem stone associated with the month DD was born!

I would use Violet if you love it and it also has a family connection, OP. Good to learn to not worry too much what people think with regard to your choices and your children! The start of a long road of judgment I have heard :)
We are planning two middle names as well. One is after my grandmother and the other will be a family member from DP or one of my best friend's potentially, or my middle name. Assuming it is a girl. I feel like it is but don't know yet! If it's a boy we will do middle name after DP's brother and another one too just something we like (this is my plan anyway haha)

I got talking to a woman on a bus and it was her daughter's name. (Keturah.) I liked it and remembered it when my daughter was born.

Ds1’s middle name was easy as dh and I both have brothers with the same first name so we used it as ds1’s middle name.

Ds2’s middle name is a name I really like but it is quite a plain name and as our surname is a very, very common one it seemed too bland to use as a first name but I still love it so happy to have it as a middle.

My grandad’s name is what I used.

Two boys. DS1 has the same middle name as FILs middle name. Though when we told FIL, he said 'I hope that's not after me, I hate it'. We told him that we liked it, so tough. DH liked the idea of honouring his dad big his first name was a no from both of us (it's a dated name).
DS2, we just liked the name. His first name is a family name on my side (but that's more a coincidence, we picked it because we liked it) and the name we picked as a middle name just flowed well and looked lovely.

To answer your question about changing the spelling, you're just setting the child up to correct people for the rest of their lives.

I know a Rylee who's mother is forever correcting people. I'm sure she thought her spelling looked nicer too.

DS1 dads name
DS2 grandads name

My kids are named after relatives for their middle names. Dont especially love their middle names but wanted to honour and remember those people.
I dont esp worry about the flow bc they are rarely said or used but I am glad those names appear on official things and those people are 'part' of my kid's identity in a small way

My dad passed away when I was pregnant so DD got the feminine version of his name for middle name

Both DD's have two middle names

Dd1 middle names are mine and dp deceased grandmothers first names, her whole name is Scarlett Millie Maureen

Dd2 middle names are mine and dp mothers first names, her whole name is Alana Stephanie susan

If we have a son his middle names will be David graham

Two middle names here-one from DH’s family that was special to him and one special to me. Both families delighted which was a bonus.
First name is not a family name.

We are only having one child, otherwise we would’ve done one middle name each child as a family name.

MiL maiden name for one child
My Dad’s name for the orher

Me, my siblings and children all have 2 middle names. It’s fine. My DC’s middle babes are

My favourite uncles name (he was very unwell when I was pg, but then lived until DS was 10), the FIL’s name.

Traditional family name that all the first girls of each generation have; the name of a place that is special to DH and I, which is also a girl’s name.

Easy for us.

Nasty, vile, passive aggressive & controlling MIL ordered us to use a specific one so naturally we went for a completely opposite one.

I picked them based on a mix of family names and names we liked but didn't like enough to be the first name. We weren't as worried about them sounding good together as not spelling out something bad. No FCK or SHT, DUMB, FAT, etc.

Both are family names for us - DS1's middle name is his uncle's (partly to honor him and partly because we loved the name anyway and it went super well with his first name), and DS2's middle name is my Grandfather's last name (Mum's maiden name), which we were lucky is also a first name.

They are both family names. One happened to be a family name on both sides and the other is on my husband’s side.