Friend used our baby name (without knowing), should we pick a new name?

Definitely not a girl's name. It wouldn't bother me if one of my friends called their baby the same as mine

@rosewater20 you couldn’t really pick a more trendy name.
I think your husband’s mate has done you a favour. So many Rowan/Rohan/Roan/Roman ‘s about now. All so similar and ripe for confusion.
I actually also prefer Rowan for a girl but wouldn’t use now it’s so trendy.

Having said that, no one owns a name as people keep saying, it’s your choice

Roman and Rowan are completely different names!

It's extremely presumptuous of your dp's 'friendship group' to tell you (!!!) not to use the name. Who on earth do they think they are? These children will barely see each other, won't be at the same schools, etc. (not that it would change my view a great deal if they were to live next door to one another). A name is for life, not just for childhood.

If your dp loses friends over this, then it's an indictment of their ideas of friendship.

Call him Rowan (lovely name, justified popularity).

Yeh no one owns a name, it’s just whether you still want to use it or not. I don’t think they have any right to be annoyed.

My baby daughter is called Rowan by the way, so obviously I like the name. It’s unisex and getting more popular for girls in UK and US as a few famous people have chosen the name for their daughters (eg Brooke Shields). Had I realised how trendy it is for both girls and boys I probably wouldn’t have picked it to be honest. I also hadn’t appreciated that Roman (with an M) has come from nowhere to be fastest rising boy name and there’s 2 at my small local nursery and the names all get muddled so when I phone i usually say “I’m phoning about Rowan with a W”. It just depends if this type of thing bothers you or not. I think the YouTuber called Roman Attoward and Roman Kemp are going to keep propelling the popularity of Roman for some time to come unfortunately for me 😫😆

If you want Irish name suggestions, I’d start a new thread with the title being “Irish names” or something - you’ll get more suggestions that way I think 😊

No one owns a name.

I personally would rather have a different name to my husband best mates child but I absolutely don’t think you should feel obliged. Your choice!

Yes Rowan/Roman is very trendy at the moment so it just depends how much that will bother you. There’s 2 Roman’s in my Nct group of 8 babies. Both Roman and Rowan are top 100 names that are rising rapidly. Neither have every been in the top 100 before in history and Roman looks set to be top 20 in next year on current trajectory

@CottonSock Rowan isn’t just a girls name, it’s a unisex name but it is getting more and more popular for girls, around 100 girls were given the name Rowan last year according to official stats and there’s more each year. Interestingly it’s a top 100 girls name in Scotland (rising rapidly) but doesn’t feature on the boys list there.
Where I’m from in Uk Roman seems to slowly be emerging as the masculine form of the name and Rowan the female form (maybe because of the MAN vs ANNE feminine sound at the end of Roman vs Rowan)

Isn't Rowan a girls name though?

I think it’s fine for you to still use it if you want. Like you say no one owns a name

Yes it is a very trendy name so it just depends if that bothers you or not? It’s top 100 now (first time in history) and rising rapidly so that’s probably the very definition of “trendy”. It’s also similar to Roman and that name is the fastest rising top 100 name (likely to be top 10/20 on current trajectory in next couple of years) and the names are quite interchangeable.

So in answer to your question, I think it’s completely fine to use the name even though someone else has used it. However if you don’t want a trendy name, then I wouldn’t use it as it is the epitome of trendy ❤️

Cian
Ciaran
Cillian
Kyran
Rohan
Ronan
Rian

I'd choose a different name unless I was 100% in love with it then I wouldn't care!

Me and a very good friend had the same baby name and neither of us batted an eyelid. She told me her baby name when she was pregnant and immediately I said no way thats mine too, so it was out there and we both stuck to it. They're spelt slightly differently but same name. Please choose whichever name you love, there are trends of names and fashions, no such thing as unique unless you make up a name, go for it! X

Why does your DHs entire friendship group know what you intend to call your child ? Sorry but that's odd.

Call your son Rowan. It is totally unreasonable of friends to say you shouldn't. You only see them 4 times a year. I have two very good friends who have called their children derivatives of two of my childrens names. They approached me v carefully before. I couldn't care less.
The only exception to this for me is cousins. I would find it a bit weird if one of my siblings used the same name. Maybe because we see each other a lot.
Beyond that, anything goes.

When I was at school there were multiple Toms, Bens and Matts - and some of their parents would have been friends prior to becoming parents. So I think using the same names within friendship groups used to be less of a big deal than it is now! Rowan is a brilliant name, just go ahead and use it, but maybe let the other Rowan's parents know beforehand and just mention your reasons to them so they know you are not copying them :)

There are so many baby names out there. I’d keep thinking and hopefully come up with something else you both love.

Corin?

They like be 4 hours away. Of course you can use Rowan!

No one "owns" a name its true .However I think it might be better if you chose a different name .Apart from anything else 2 Rowans will be difficult to deal with when you are all together !

I'd email them beforehand to explain, but definitely use the name if you still love it.

Someone I know had a baby two months after me and used the same (kind of unusual) name. We're not close so not quite the same situation, but I don't mind at all - it's an excellent name!

You only see them for times a year. Stick with your name. And the other friends can mind their own business.

I think Rohan is nicer for a boy.

I agree with PPs. No one owns a name and you have spent months thinking of your child as Rowan. It has particular meaning for you now.

I especially agree with eaglejukesk. The friends asking you to pick another name are either not thinking straight or are simply being unreasonable. No one has a monopoly on a name. They'll get over it.

But choose Rowan if you like!