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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Enfys as a middle name

39 replies

Shinnyyyyyyy · 03/01/2020 19:50

Recently discovered we are having another girl.

My last pregnancy ended in miscarriage and so I wanted to incorporate a name with a rainbow meaning for the baby I’m carrying.

We’re still not sure on the first name but I really want Enfys as a middle name but DH says no... I was hoping for other opinions though to see whether I’m being daft or not.

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bridgetreilly · 05/01/2020 20:00

It's perfectly fine to use it as a middle name, but not if your DH doesn't want to. Could you suggest having two middle names?

BecauseReasons · 05/01/2020 18:28

TBH it's a middle name- it's really not the end of the world if its difficult for some people to pronounce. How often will strangers need to say it anyway?

goatbame · 05/01/2020 15:31

I have to explain to everyone how to spell my name correctly. And now ds's and DH's. It's really not ruined my life. Hmm

MikeUniformMike · 05/01/2020 14:26

goatbame - welsh names are spelt phonetically.
You explain how to say a name to every new person. How many people will see meet for the first time in a lifetime?

I know people whose long term partners don't get their name right.

goatbame · 05/01/2020 13:48

I love the name btw.

goatbame · 05/01/2020 13:48

Are you Welsh/live in Wales? If so, then yes. If not, then not many people will be able to pronounce it properly, which would be a shame.

My ds has a VERY tricky Welsh name which sounds totally different to how it's spelt. We live in the States. People mispronounce it and we correct them then they say it properly. It's really no biggy. Hmm

MikeUniformMike · 05/01/2020 13:24

Owl, there are lots of welsh sounds that have no English equivalents.
Rh, Ngh, Ch and Ll certainly, but vowels and vowel combinations too.

Eu, ei, uw, ew, ae, ir, ar, u, y are just some.

Why would people say Emphis for Enfys - because some people use the same sound for n and m in some words, and because F doesn't immediately look like a V sound.
I've heard Bronwen being pronounced as Bromwin in England.

Some names are easy or won't get mangled too badly (e.g. Bryn, Gareth, Delyth, Carys). I've even seen arguments on here about how to say Eleri and Teleri. Both should be easy as they are phonetic. El-ERRY and Tel-ERRY, and both rhyme with Ceri (Kerry).

You can tell people how to say a name but not everyone will get it, and when you are explaining to people how to say your name every time you meet someone new, it is a PITA. Getting your name misspelt regularly is a PITA, especially if the other person tells you that you are wrong and they are right.

In the recent run-up to the election, the BBC kept referring to Nigh-a Griffith. How difficult can it be to get a name like Nia right?

IIRC, you have a daughter called Celyn - does she ever get Kellun, Sellun, See-lyn, Celine? I know it's pronounced KELLin, but I wouldn't say it was obvious should you not speak welsh.

OwlBeThere · 05/01/2020 04:10

I have 4 kids with welsh names with an English father, and Irish stepmother and a Danish stepfather, I know that names get mangled! That said I don’t think other people’s mispronunciation should put you off if you love a name. There is nothing inherently hard about the pronunciation of Enfys, and in my experience most cope fine once you Say it once. I’ve never in 16 years had anyone say Emphis?! Why would they?

I just get annoyed that people talk like welsh names are unpronounceable, when, with the exception of Ll there are no sounds that English doesn’t have so all it requires is a little bit of listening.

MikeUniformMike · 04/01/2020 16:05

Owl, I think you'd be surprised how mangled names get. I can remember a Siobhan at school (in Wales) who would get Sigh-o-ban, Seeob-an, Shob-han, or Shivonne if she was lucky. Poor thing.

Enfys will get Emphis, which does sound like Emphysema.

Welsh names tend to not travel well.

OwlBeThere · 04/01/2020 15:42

Btw Enfys doesn’t sound like emphysema. Grin
EN-viss
em-fuh-SEE-muh

Literally the only similarity is they begin with an E sound. So by that logic Emily, Erica, Emma, Ella, Esther all ‘sound like emphysema’.

OwlBeThere · 04/01/2020 15:37

@TotallyWipedout I’m not looking to be offended, and I’m not offended in the slightest, I’m simply pointing out that there are plenty of people who have non-English names in the world (not just welsh, but Irish or polish or Russian or Fijian or whatever) and they cope just fine. It not being common to Monoglot English speakers is not a reason to not pick a name someone likes.

MikeUniformMike · 04/01/2020 15:37

I think that the reference to a rainbow implies that the baby would not have been conceived if the miscarriage hadn't happened.

I know a couple who were only going to have one child, and were perfectly happy with DC1. An unplanned pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage, and the loss meant a planned and much wanted DC2, so it isn't always the case.

Cohle · 04/01/2020 15:15

I'm sorry for loss OP, but I personally think a child should be named on their own merits, rather than having a name that will always remind you of a loss.

Have you discussed with your DH why he objects to Enfys?

NailsNeedDoing · 04/01/2020 15:08

Does your DH dislike it because he doesn’t like the name, or because he doesn’t want his daughter to carry a name which has been given specifically because of a miscarriage?

I’d understand if it were the latter, and agree that your dd should have her own identity that isn’t associated with your sad loss.

MikeUniformMike · 04/01/2020 14:59

Enfys in pronounced Envis. (like Elvis)
I'm not keen on it as a name, and would also suggest Iris.
Sorry about your loss.

DontGoJasonWaterfalls · 04/01/2020 10:44

Love Enfys. It's on our list for middle names for hopeful future DC#2 (who would also be a rainbow baby).

Welsh names tend to get a bit of flak on here. I posted about DD1's name when I was pregnant 6 years ago and had all sorts of comments about how no one would know how to pronounce it everyone would hate it etc. Weve never had any issues (Celyn is the name).

Shangrilalala · 04/01/2020 10:37

Enfys is lovely. DS has one in his class. Also love Haf, but obviously this will work best at certain times of year.

CuckooCachoo · 04/01/2020 10:31

Enfys is lovely, Iris also means rainbow if you like that.

I’m sorry for your loss Flowers

Ellmau · 04/01/2020 10:29

I think it would be fine as a mn which most people won't know anyway.

What about Violet, as one of the colours in the rainbow and a recognisable name?

TotallyWipedout · 04/01/2020 09:43

@OwlBeThere There's always someone who's looking to be offended Sad.

I'm guessing that, statistically, there are significantly fewer Welsh people on MN than there are English people. This is not English-centric. I do in fact feel slightly the same about what I would see as London-centric comments - I wouldn't be snarky and offended about them, though.

FrederickSinclair · 04/01/2020 04:35

It's a lovely name. I don't think all this angst over how English people portray it is necessary, especially as it's a middle name. I had a thread on here asking about a Welsh name for my DS and got so much negativity. A friend in RL said to me, if people can't learn a name that comes from their own country when we live somewhere with many different nationalities now, that says a lot more about them.

Carolemia · 04/01/2020 04:22
  • First child of viable pregnancy that is!
Carolemia · 04/01/2020 04:21

P.S Congratulations and sorry for your terrible loss before. I’ve had 7 miscarriages and am in late stages of pregnancy with my first now so I know it’s a rough road!

Carolemia · 04/01/2020 04:20

Not keen as it sounds like emphysema...
I’d go with a middle name of Hope or Sky...
Or a translation of sun as the sun comes out to make a rainbow? Example: Solen.
If you’re wanting a Welsh name, I think Carys and Alys are lovely!

alexdgr8 · 04/01/2020 04:05

i guessed that's how its pronounced. makes it sound like envy to most English speakers. sorry to be English-centric, but English is spoken much more widely than welsh; its likely when grown up she will spend at least some time living in English-only speaking areas, for work probably.
anyway, ask your husband to write down say 5 that he likes, you do the same, until you coincide. good luck.