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Baby names

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Is your baby taking your surname or your partners?

81 replies

Lsquiggles · 06/02/2019 10:39

Hi all!

I am a first time mom expecting a baby girl in June and I was wondering whether or not those of you who aren't married have given your child your partners surname or your own?

My partner and I have been together almost 3 years and I'd love to get married. He's in no rush to get married any time soon. I've had quite a few friends who have given their child their partners surnames and then broken up, therefore never having the same surname as their child.

I love my partner and of course would love to assume we will get married one day but I'd hate to not have the same surname as my child if something was to go wrong and for us to break up.

My family also feel strongly about me not giving our baby girl my boyfriends name if we're not married yet so I'm conflicted.

What are your thoughts?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ReaganSomerset · 06/02/2019 11:02

I've seen so many people on here and in real life regret giving kids their partner's surname. I would advise against it. If you split it can't be changed without the father's consent.

BegoniasAndPetunias25 · 06/02/2019 11:01

If you’re not married she should have your surname. You can always change it to his if you do get married in the future (and you want to change it).

elQuintoConyo · 06/02/2019 10:59

MiniConyo Mysurname DHsurname.

Mine is not a middle name.
No hyphen.
No problems going through airports/across borders.

My surname is constantly mispronounced
and misspelled, DH's easy to pronounce and spell - but it is rather a comedy name and there is no way I wanted to be El Quinto Sixfingers (or near enough)!

So DS is: MiniConyo Speltbadly Comedyname.

No one has given an opinion of his surname or any traditional sexist bollocks. They'd get short shrift if they did.

ChubsyMcChubFace · 06/02/2019 10:54

It would be different if neither of you wanted to get married btw. In which case, I’d double barrel.

ChubsyMcChubFace · 06/02/2019 10:53

We were married before I had dc and I took dh’s surname, (shoot me Grin). The dcs also have his name, so that we all match. Theoretically, had dh’s surname been a weird one like my maiden name and mine been a straightforward, easy to spell one, he might have taken my name. As it was, I was happy to shed my maiden name as it was a pain having to spell it out all the time!

Anywho, if we hadn’t been married when we had dcs and especially if I had been keen on marriage, but bf not so much, there is not a snowball’s chance in hell I would have consented to them having his surname.

I’d want my dcs to share my surname. If my surname was my maiden name, because my bf didn’t fancy marriage, but he was pushing for the children to share his surname while I didn’t... Hmm.

Suzysuzuki · 06/02/2019 10:50

We double-barrelled. Baby DPname-myname. When/if we marry I will have same name as baby.