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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Me and dh can't decide

59 replies

bluebird3 · 23/01/2019 20:39

Has anyone else been in the position where you and dh just don't agree on names at all?
We're having a surprise so that makes it even harder as there are 2 names to disagree on. Sad. We've been through over 1000 girls names and only sort of agreed on one and neither of us like it that much. It's probably #30 on my list. I'm starting to feel really down about it. There are so many names that I love and I'm so sad that I won't love my baby's name. My dh is the most stubborn person in the world and won't change his mind about my names.

I'm 34 weeks and don't see us coming to an agreement.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Flamingosnbears · 24/01/2019 16:03

Susanna to me seems to smoosh both yours and your husbands tastes together...

TheBhagwan · 24/01/2019 15:57

I’m American and that’s news to me about the name Elise! I know a few Elise/Elyses from childhood and college. One is a fairly successful actress, one is a partner at a big law firm, and one is some kind of scientist. There is one more but I have no idea what she’s doing, although her father was some kind of CEO.

I grew up in Westchester County (NY) and went to Cornell — I don’t know if you’re familiar with those but they’re not exactly what you’d think of as “chavvy.” Sometimes you have to look outside your own life experience, especially if you are raising your child in a different country de where you grew up.

OutPinked · 24/01/2019 15:48

Oh and it’s worth noting some parents don’t agree until the baby is born. My brother was ‘baby’ for a few weeks until my mum decided!

OutPinked · 24/01/2019 15:47

Esther, Iris and Hazel are the only ones I could see myself ever using. The others are either too ‘modern’ like Skylar or too old fashioned (but not in a timeless ‘cool’ way) like Susannah.

Susannah makes me think of Trinny and Susannah so not a great connotation. Obviously this is just my opinion and it’s all subjective. You can see from both of your lists why you’re struggling to agree, a fair few of yours are definitely more American (Piper for example) and I can also see why you wouldn’t want to use Katrina.

daisypond · 24/01/2019 15:47

Agree - Susannah is super.
Names have different connotations to different people. eg, I disagree with PP above who said Elsie was similar but sweeter than Elise. Elsie is dowdy and dreary kitchen maid to me, whereas Elise seems quite French chic/sweet.

MikeUniformMike · 24/01/2019 15:33

Susannah is lovely!

bluebird3 · 24/01/2019 15:21

Thanks for all your input. Part of the problem is probably that I'm American and Dh is English so different names have different connotations to us.

For example Elise is considered quite 'chavy' in the USA although we don't really have that term. Katrina only brings to mind Hurricane Katrina. And I love Paige, but that looks to be really unpopular here in the UK from all of your suggestions.

We have a very English surname and live in England so I sort of feel like I should get to have more input into the first name and for it to be more 'American' but dh doesn't agree.

I definitely don't want any top 10 names that are really vowel-y (Eva, Ava, Evie, Isla, Olivia, Ada, etc.) They just aren't for me and I have a name that was common in school and hated it. Plus we have loads of goods friends with babies with these sort of names so even if I like one it's already used and I don't want to duplicate.

I also like Sadie, Scarlett, Violet, Betsy, Kiera, Leah, Ruby, Cora, Beatrice, Summer but DH has said no to them all.

I did think maybe Susannah but when I mentioned it at work the entire table of 6 ladies pulled a face and thought it was terrible which has now put me off.

The one we both thought was ok was Abby but I guess I'm just disappointed it might come down to a name we both think is just ok rather than one I love when there are probably 20-30 that I do love.

If it's a boy we will probably name it Henry. We both have always said we liked it, it's a family name for DH and I don't have the energy to find an alternative bc dh has said no to every other suggestion I've made.

OP posts:
aj90x · 24/01/2019 14:19

What about Elsie instead of Elise? Similar but much sweeter

Astronica · 24/01/2019 12:48

On DH list I like Eva, Esther and Susannah. These all feel classic, timeless and smart to me. On yours I like Rosie and Iris, and don't mind Piper but it's very 'now' which means it'll be very out in a while. There are a few on each list that I would immediately cross off - Maria, Alina, Meredith, Bianca, Skylar.

Marina
Anthea
Elspeth
Anna
Anya
Luna
Pippa

Joinourclub · 24/01/2019 12:29

Your lists are quite different, but there is some cross over in style.

Eva
Annie
Elise
Rosie
Iris.

What about:
Rosanna
Elsie
Verity
Bonnie
Sadie
Scarlett
Ruby

Cosmoa · 24/01/2019 12:28

@Shadow1234

Lol it's nice to see you suggesting Soraya all the time! (and I also notice you're now spelling it the more usual way rather than Soreya)

It was almost my daughters name but I don't like the So-rye-ah pronunciation so it's her middle name instead!

Anyway, OP I hope you find a name you love!!!

moredoll · 24/01/2019 12:26

It looks like your DH prefers classical names and you prefer modern.
How about Frances nn Frankie?
That said, it's you that will be doing the hard work at birth so you should get to choose. DH can choose the middle name. But I hope you find a name you agree on.

MikeUniformMike · 24/01/2019 12:18

Dh's list:
Maria - lovely, classic, easy to spell & say in most languages.
Katrina - no. Trina. A bit 1950s.
Alina - not keen
Eva - overused. Braun. Don't like it.
Esther - nice
Susannah - lovely
Annie (ok but terrible with our surname) - lovely but must go with surname
Elise - not keen

Mine:
Paige - i like it but probably a bit downmarket
Meredith - no
Hazel - ok, a bit Watership Down
Rosie - nice
Iris - a bit old lady
Bianca - is she still in EE?
Skylar - no. awful.
Lyra - no.
Piper - no. Pipe for short.

daisypond · 24/01/2019 11:59

Your names are very different. I prefer your DH's list by a long way, though I like Iris from yours.
But there are two that could go in either list. Rosie/Annie are similar. How about Rose/Rosa or Anna?

Shadow1234 · 24/01/2019 08:37

I also prefer some of your husbands suggestions.
Elise is nice, what about Karina/Carina as opposed to Katrina?

Other suggestions, just in case...

Sienna
Anya
Soraya
Hailey
Romy
Lois
Estelle
Brooke
Leonie
Cara
Clara
Kiera
Lauren
Sophia
Freya
Saffron
Megan
Sara

WrapAndRoll · 24/01/2019 08:37

Sorry, pressed send by mistake!

WrapAndRoll · 24/01/2019 08:36

Marissa
Marianne
Louisa
Estella
Sophia
El

Maria
Katrina
Alina
Eva
Esther
Susannah
Annie (ok but terrible with our surname)
Elise

Mine:
Paige
Meredith
Hazel
Rosie
Iris
Bianca
Skylar
Lyra
Piper

kaytee87 · 24/01/2019 08:23

I too think your DH list on the whole is nicer (don't like Alina and do like Meredith though). Another vote for Rosa (Rosalie).

ApolloandDaphne · 24/01/2019 07:29

I really like your DHs list. He has the name of one of my DDs on it. I don't like your names at all. Choose one of his.

Oysterbabe · 24/01/2019 07:00

What about Annika or Annabel. Does that work better with your surname? Then you could call her Annie as a pet name.
DH and I didn't agree for a long time, we kept our eyes open and eventually happened upon a name we both loved, I think one was a woman being interviewed on the news!

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 24/01/2019 00:36

The names I like on your list are.
Iris and Piper. Hazel is okay, but I wouldn't go as far as to say "I like it."
Rosa is a more sophisticated untwee alternative to Rosie. I also agree about losing Paige.

I like all your dhs names aside from
Esther

If you've gone through 1000s of names. You've probably thought of the names I'm going to suggests, but its worth a shot, I guess.

Alissa
Alexia
Anastasia
Aurora
Arielle
Elissa
Elisa
Elsa
Elena
Delia
Clarissa
Claudia
Florianne
Francesca
Natalia
Matilda
Kiera or is it Keira.Blush.
Lydia
Louisa.
Leah
Lucia
Sofia
Tabitha
Olivia
Erin
Nancy
Leia
Kayla
Rhianna.

TigerQuoll · 24/01/2019 00:00

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TigerQuoll · 23/01/2019 23:54

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TigerQuoll · 23/01/2019 23:53

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AnotherRoadsideAttraction · 23/01/2019 23:23

Bianca is gorgeous and your DH seems to like 'a' endings...

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