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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Me and dh can't decide

59 replies

bluebird3 · 23/01/2019 20:39

Has anyone else been in the position where you and dh just don't agree on names at all?
We're having a surprise so that makes it even harder as there are 2 names to disagree on. Sad. We've been through over 1000 girls names and only sort of agreed on one and neither of us like it that much. It's probably #30 on my list. I'm starting to feel really down about it. There are so many names that I love and I'm so sad that I won't love my baby's name. My dh is the most stubborn person in the world and won't change his mind about my names.

I'm 34 weeks and don't see us coming to an agreement.

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starkid · 28/01/2019 13:34

For what it's worth, my favourites from what you've mentioned are:
Maria
Elise
Paige
Hazel
Beatrice
Summer

I guess just both keep your shortlists, don't say definite to Abby or anything yet, and wait and see unfortunately :)

Original poster
bluebird3 · 26/01/2019 07:54

firsty we did that for 1000 names and had no matches Sad

OP posts:
alessandrae83 · 25/01/2019 22:50

Namea for Nickname Annie

Marianne
Anastasia
Annabelle
Annalise

Or what about

Eleanora
Ivy
Holly
Jasmine
Pearl

Thatwasfast · 25/01/2019 22:33

I have a Henry - his sisters name is Lily

Echobelly · 25/01/2019 22:32

DH could not settle on a girl's name we both liked, but as I was going to bed a week before DD was due (we didn't know sex, but we had a boy's name), he suddenly suggested one that hit the spot and I said 'Yeah, go for it' - it was along the names of some of the names we quite liked but couldn't quite go for, and was neither too popular (which we were trying to avoid) nor too obscure.

It will come!

Firstty · 25/01/2019 22:27

There is a tinder style app you can download. You swipe yes or no to a list of names and your partner does the same- then you see the names that you both said yes to.

Shadow1234 · 25/01/2019 22:24

@cosmoa - Lol - I wouldnt list if if the OP was only looking for specifics, but if they are open to any names then I cant resist offering it up - it's such a beautiful name, (even suggested it to my daughter who is expecting a little girl in April - but she wasnt keen!).

ApolloandDaphne · 25/01/2019 09:22

When we had our first DC we had s boys name but no girls name. When DD was born she had no name initially. I then said to DH an hour or so later that her name was going to be XY. It was two names we hadn't even discussed and he agreed that was definitely her name. Maybe wait and see if you have a girl OP and the name might just come to you.

nocluenoidea · 24/01/2019 22:06

If you agreed to cross 2 names off your list, would he do the same? And continue on the same vein until you're left with a combined 'shortlist'?
I'd personally scrap Paige- it's just a bit tacky. My husband is Australia and likes that name (so maybe the same as your American perspective) but being English it just sounds awful to me. Sadly I'd also get rid of Piper, though I actually love that name and it's quite popular here in Australia it means 'blow job' in French which totally put me off :(

Backhometothenorth · 24/01/2019 21:47

Chances are he will be so blown away by the complete miracle you have just performed in bringing your beautiful baby into the world that he may be swayed from his rigid view of things. Or maybe not- it is so hard to choose but try not to let it overshadow the last few weeks of your pregnancy. Good luck OP ThanksCake

Original poster
bluebird3 · 24/01/2019 21:38

Some lovely suggestions - many of which I am open to but dh is literally only open to his list. Anything else I suggest is a flat no. I know some of his are lovely options to many people but for one reason or another, I don't like them (associate it with somebody/something, doesn't fit our surname, close friend/relative has the same or something too similar).

I just don't know how we will agree when he is so rigid. He won't agree to me picking first name and him picking middle, asking other people, drawing out of a hat. He just thinks that we will find one we both like, but to be honest we have been through thousands and there aren't really any left one of us hasn't said no to. I have about 30-40 I would be happy with, he has about 10.

I think I will just leave it for now. I keep getting stressed and it's the last thing I need these last few weeks of pregnancy. Maybe it will be a boy.

OP posts:
Disfordarkchocolate · 24/01/2019 21:38

Miranda is perfect for a girl. I found girls names really hard, my daughter was a week old before she had a name because she didn't look like the name we'd picked!

Ngaio2 · 24/01/2019 21:34

So easy to find a name until you have to get the father to agree! I often wonder what it would feel like to be from a culture where the baby’s name is chosen by the grandparents.
What about Brianna?
Harriet or Henriette or Henrietta?
Suzette, Suzanne

HJL2506 · 24/01/2019 21:10

Elise is a beautiful name :)

Normandy144 · 24/01/2019 20:48

Avery? I love this name but for various reasons couldn't use it. More popular in North America, but much less so here in the UK.

Backhometothenorth · 24/01/2019 20:34

I have an Annie and an Esther. I would suggest

Olive
Miriam
Eliza
Connie
Cora

bluebell2017 · 24/01/2019 20:26

Rachel
Lucy
Jenna
Julia
Heather

YahBasic · 24/01/2019 18:32

I like Abby.

I think an option to combine your very separate styles is to think of a longer, more traditional name that can have a more modern nickname.

Alexandra - Ally, Alexa, Lexie
Adelaide/Adele - Addy
Rosanna - Rosie
Elisabeth/Liberty - Libby

BendingSpoons · 24/01/2019 17:35

Greta
Freya
Emilina

BendingSpoons · 24/01/2019 17:31

What about:
Lara
Zara
Maya
Might be a compromise. Saying that I like Abby.

Thiswayorthatway · 24/01/2019 16:43

Nancy

CharlyAngelic · 24/01/2019 16:37

Amanda
Aurelia
Lois
Hilda

daisypond · 24/01/2019 16:33

Or Elizabeth - nicknamed Betsy?

moredoll · 24/01/2019 16:28

If you like Sadie how would your DH feel about Sarah, nn Sadie?

turquoisebaby · 24/01/2019 16:09

Truthfully I think Susannah is awful, which is going against the popular vote here. I know too many people age 45+ called Sue, Susie, Suzanne. It's used alot and makes me think of middled aged people. I'm not a massive fan of either of your choices though, none are jumping out at me. I like the ticking off names idea, that could work well. You could combine an American and UK list to make it more fair.

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