Going by middle name

I think Esme is a beautiful name. Much prefer it to Alice.

This coming from a girl who has both a male first name and male last name - Morgan James.

And spent my life correcting substitute teachers who would call me James Morgan when reading the register.

I had it just yesterday someone rung asking for myself and were genuinely baffled when I said it was me. They expected me to me a man.

Esme is a perfectly nice normal name, I was expecting something silly. The people around you sound a bit ignorant.

I second that going by a middle name will be difficult with medical records. Seen a lot of cock ups due to that, eg. someone coming to A&E, using the name they go by and no one being able to find notes or record of them because it's all under their actual first name.

Esme is an amazing name! It's not unusual in the way you perceive it, honestly. I am a teacher and I wouldn't bat an eye at this name, in fact I would think it's a beautiful name for a girl! Much prefer it to Alice too.

I go by my middle name. First name is a 'classic' but my parents thought my middle name suited me more. Middle name is very uncommon but is definitely a name!

It's not a big deal. I can honestly say it has never impacted on my life in a bad way. Most people laugh when they hear my real name as they think I am perfectly suited for my middle name.

I think, and I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, that it's a little late to change it and that it's a selfish thing to do at this point.

Esme is a lovely name and people will always have opinions on names, whether it's Olivia "too popular" or it's Chanel "too tacky", or it's that X is too posh or Z too strange or Y too much of an old lady's name.

If you change her name to Alice, it will still cause reactions from some people.

I also think she’s a bit old now for you to be changing her name, sorry. If she was a baby and you really didn’t like it I’d say go for it, but I think it would be unfair on her to do it at 2.

For what it’s worth I think Esme is a pretty name. I know that doesn’t help much if you don’t like it, but I think people are just being rude if they openly say they don’t like it, and whatever name you pick you’ll get people who don’t like it! Do you think it could be that when people say it’s unusual that is actually what they mean (although I know a couple of young Esmes, so it is growing in popularity) and you’re worrying that it’s them saying they don’t like it because you really don’t like it?

There is nothing wrong with Esme, there is many children called it now. I can't understand why you'd get a bad reaction from anyone about it. Could it be your insecurity about it?

I'm surprised people are making faces at Esme. There's nothing wrong with it as a name at all, it's lovely.

I'm known by my middle name and it is a minor pain. I'm used to answering to either name (things like the doctor etc use my first/full name) and you do need to remember to use the first name when booking flights, or rather the other people are booking flights! Nothing majorly difficult though if you aren't fussed about using either name when necessary.

It's not a big deal at all to go by the middle name, and is quite a normal thing to do in some cultures. You just start using it if that's what you want to do. It's not too late to change what she's called.

However, Esme Alice is a lovely name. Did you love Esme before you thought other people were reacting to it? If so I strongly encourage you to ignore other reactions (how very rude of them) and be strong in continuing to use it. It really is a very appealing name that is quite popular and increasing in popularity. I feel Esme and Alice have a very similar sweet old-fashioned yet modern feel to them.

It really comes down to what you want in your heart. I like the idea of calling her Esme Alice, the full name, for a while to see if that helps.

Most places now on forms etc have preferred name box (so you could put Alice in that)

Esme is lovely. Alice is nice too but I think they're actually quite a similar kind of name. Alice is a bit more traditional and also slightly old-fashioned. I'm not sure I would change it if Esme's the name her friends know her by. You could be misinterpreting the looks on people's faces.

Esme is a beautiful name! Pls don’t change it!!

Esme is a gorgeous name, Alice is boring. I'm pretty sure she'd change back in adulthood anyway

I love Esme but it's not about me of course. My dad and his brothers have all been known by their middle name. Hasn't caused any problems

Oh goodness, I love Esme!! Whatever your choice is, it has to suit you all. Good luck OP.

It also happened a lot 30+ years ago as children were given family names for the first name, then known by their middle names there whole lives.
Thinking about it, it was actually really common with my Mum's generation & doesn't seem to cause that many problems.

Esme is a beautiful name and not that unusual (I have taught a few and know of adult Esme's). If you do want to change it maybe start calling her Esme Alice every time and slowly drop the Esme. It will give her and others chance to get used to her being an Alice as well as an Esme.

We have had a few people at work who are known by their middle names - can be an issue with workstuff if they only go on passport names for all the emails etc, but generally no issue at all .

I personally think 2 is too old to change her name. It isn't fair.

I was expecting something really strange and difficult to pronounce, Esme is a reasonably common name and I'm surprised you're having these issues. My DM has always gone by her middle name so I'm sure it wouldn't be an issue

Sorry loves (not lives)

At age 2 your dd knows her name, Esme. I think it would be confusing and unfair to change it to another name, Alice.

I'd wait until your dd is older and include her in the decision, especially as your dh lives the name.

Esme Alice is lovely. How rude of people to pull faces/suggest they hate it.

Change it if you feel that's the right decision for you, your DH and your daughter. But I agree that it might be hard to get your DD to adjust to a new name.