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Baby names

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Original poster

Which surname to use on birth certificate

31 replies

EducationComesFirst · 09/09/2018 11:55

We are of Eastern European origin and so the surname ending changes depending on the sex (letter "a" is added in the end for females). I would like to get some opinions on what version of surname sounds "better" to English ear (as need to register our daughter). Below is not the real name but similar example. Thanks!

Margaret Poludev
or
Margaret Poludeva

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eevowels · 15/09/2018 09:30

NC as outing, I'm Eastern European as well and my family moved to an English-speaking country when I was still a teenager. The surname vowels were an absolute nightmare and after 5 years we've all officially changed our surnames to the same ending. My dad's had "e" on the end because of French spelling rules (the language rules that were used in the passport to transliterate from Cyrillic), so everyone cut off the last vowel and the surname became the same for everyone, male or female. Life became much easier Grin ...think EVERY single time you sort out anything life-admin related you end up in a 5-10min conversation why your surname is different from your parent/ spouse and vice versa, after years of it + mangled names on addresses, invitations, official forms, we've all had enough. Maybe that was just us though Blush

Sarahandduck18 · 15/09/2018 08:42

A

moredoll · 15/09/2018 02:03

Poludeva sounds better. For you as well.

EthelThePiratesDaughter · 14/09/2018 12:52

I would add the A.

Sugarpiehoneyeye · 14/09/2018 10:01

Margaret Poludeva, lovely !

ladycarlotta · 14/09/2018 09:54

I know adult sisters born in the UK to Polish parents - one uses the masculine version of their surname, one has chosen to use the female. I think while they're dependents it's nice (and probably convenient) that their surnames match, plus the feminine version is prettier.

I'm cautious about how generally shitty and draconian our bureaucratic system is, but I THINK your husband having Poludev and you guys having Poludeva is logical and might not cause too many problems. In theory, there is plenty of precedent for married couples to have wildly divergent names.

pumpkinyael · 09/09/2018 19:05

I personally would however simply stick to the Polish name tradition :) (I'm admittedly not particularly bothered about different surnames in the same family...)

pumpkinyael · 09/09/2018 19:03

Poludeva sounds much nicer :)

In fact, I think it is nicer and makes more sense when everyone in the family has the same surname.

Would it be possible for your DH to switch to Poludeva (if having the same surname is so important to you?) I'm not Polish so idk but I really do think that the feminine version sounds nicer and more melodic!

BlueBug45 · 09/09/2018 19:02

Some couples I know are starting to use different lastnames for boys and girls. In your case your name has a tradition behind it and so you should go with it.

Original poster
EducationComesFirst · 09/09/2018 18:54

Thanks for responses everyone. I am not too bothered about tradition. In fact, I think it is nicer and makes more sense when everyone in the family has the same surname. All I would like to find out in this post is which version of surname sounds nicer in English?

OP posts:
AutoFilled · 09/09/2018 18:19

I know some Eastern Europeans with masculine and feminine surnames. It’s not hard to understand at all. They really do look related.

Given your DD1 is poludeva, I would name DD2 as poludeva too. It’s traditional. Whether you change to poludeva will depends on what you want I think.

SoupDragon · 09/09/2018 18:10

Go with tradition. People will cope!

TatianaLarina · 09/09/2018 18:08

.. for example.

TatianaLarina · 09/09/2018 18:08

it's not a confusing concept

Indeed it’s not but it will confuse people nonetheless who aren’t aware of the rules from other cultures.

Few English are aware of the significance of Ó and Ní and Mac and Nic.

NataliaOsipova · 09/09/2018 17:54

I'd go for one surname for the whole family as well. That said, any of the places where it "matters" that it's right (eg on passports, travel tickets etc), you'd usually be the person typing it these days, so it may not be as much of a practical issue as it once was. (I am old and had an unusual maiden name; remember years of angst when my name was misspelt on travel documents despite having spelt it out over the phone!)

LeeMiller · 09/09/2018 17:51

I'd stick with tradition. Poludeva sounds nicer too.

JungWan · 09/09/2018 17:18

it's not a confusing concept. I think if you have it the correct way on the birth certs, ie, with an 'a' for a girl, without for a son, then if people get it wrong they get it wrong. But if you do it wrong in anticipation of people getting it wrong, most people who know it's got an 'a' on the end of the name for a girl will get it wrong when they get it right!!

pumpkinyael · 09/09/2018 17:15

Definitely Poludeva! :)

TatianaLarina · 09/09/2018 15:06

I think for practical purposes it’s easier to go with the customs of the country you’re in. I’d call everyone Poludev even if it sounds nicer with an a. It will confuse people otherwise.

GingerCatBigBalls · 09/09/2018 14:09

I think having all the females with the "a" version is best - keeps with tradition plus eastern European style surnames ending in a often sound quite cool (imho).

DarkestBeforeDawn · 09/09/2018 12:47

I really like the idea of keeping with the tradition and also like the 'a' sound at the end. I would have girls with 'a' and boys without.

Original poster
EducationComesFirst · 09/09/2018 12:35

I was thinking of changing either my surname or our Dd1 surname by deed poll depending on the version that's better. So either everyone in the family goes by Poludev (logistically a bit easier), or males are Poludev and females are Poludeva...

OP posts:
OurMiracle1106 · 09/09/2018 12:28

I think with the a especially if dd1s surname includes the a.

Original poster
EducationComesFirst · 09/09/2018 12:19

To me, I think since the surname is foreign, the shorter the better 😂, but maybe I am wrong? I don't really care about the cultural aspects, just want to use the version that flows better...

OP posts:
Sunflower321 · 09/09/2018 12:17

Poludeva flows more easily.

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