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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

If Mumsnet had a baby.......

65 replies

Celestia26 · 26/07/2018 21:36

Just that really, a bit of fun!
So if Mumsnet had a baby what would it be called...?
I think a girl would be Ottilie and a boy would be Reuben. These seem to be universally loved on Mumsnet and are suggested loads!
Any other ideas?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

ParisNext · 27/07/2018 05:56

I don't think it's the activities on the vest that people are questioning but the idiocy of putting your baby in a vest which tells the world that you do them and in a pretty naff rhyme...
I like spinach smoothies and avoid alcohol but I do not wear a t shirt with these facts on!

Cosmoa · 27/07/2018 05:42

What's so wrong about the vest idea? Why are people being so ignorant about breast feeding and cloth nappies? Hate to break it to you all but breastfeeding is natural and the norm. And cloth nappies are amazing for obvious reasons. I have massive respect for anyone who breastfeeds and uses cloth nappies!!!

And no, I don't use cloth nappies or have a vegan child named 'Quinoa' before you jump to any ignorant stereotypical presumptions about me.

Cosmoa · 27/07/2018 05:36

@PixelAteMe

Sounds pretty good to me 😂😂😂

Mol1628 · 27/07/2018 05:03

I’ve seen that slogan on a baby grow in real life too, sadly.

Snipples · 27/07/2018 02:56

God I hope that babygrow is a joke. Who in the name of god would buy that?! Grim

AndNoneForGretchenWieners · 27/07/2018 02:47

Verity or Jonty

NonaGrey · 27/07/2018 02:46

Avocado for a boy.

His nickname would be Smash clearly.

Sophronia · 27/07/2018 02:36

Sebastian or Gabriel

Ottilie

RedDwarves · 27/07/2018 01:01

Ottilie is polarising. Definitely not universally loved.

I am astounded for the love of Margot and other similarly old and dowdy names.

FartnissEverbeans · 26/07/2018 23:25

Baby Mumsnet will be able to identify shapes and colours by ten months, and recite their favourite books by heart at one year. But don't worry, all children are different, yours will catch up!

PixelAteMe · 26/07/2018 23:05

Babynet’s first word will be “organic”, and he/she will be given kale smoothies as a treat.

The paternal grandmother (yes, the dreaded MIL) won’t get to meet her DGC for at least six months, and then only for an hour. If she wants a cup of tea, she will have to make her own, as Babynet’s mother is far too tired from constant breastfeeding and co-sleeping.

MIL would be very unreasonable to expect more than annual contact with her DGC, as the new little family have busy lives, with baby gym, baby yoga, baby massage, baby music and baby babble classes. At ten months, Babynet can scream blue murder in English, French and Mandarin.

Weekends are spent hand-scrubbing nappies with pure soap flakes, rinsing quinoa and preparing sugar-free cakes.

MysteriesOfTheOrganism · 26/07/2018 23:02

Boy: Jender. Girl; Sis.

Barbadosgirl · 26/07/2018 22:59

Op, please tell me you are joking about the baby vest!!!

Cosmoa · 26/07/2018 22:51

Growing up they would eat a lot of pesto pasta while secretly yearning for spam fritters. 😂😂😂😂😂

AdaColeman · 26/07/2018 22:48

And they would live in TONGA.

Hippopotas · 26/07/2018 22:42

Balonz lol

MikeWyzowski · 26/07/2018 22:33

Nappynet not a runner?

Given that its surname would probably be Net, and in keeping with the theme of mumsnet, gransnet, dadsnet, Babynet could be a possibility too. None of that Persephone, Ottilie, Hector or Oscar nonsense. Stick with tradition or else Dads, Mums and Grans will be highly offended and have to take to posting in aibu about their rude dd or dil who have gone off piste with naming their new offspring and how dare they reject the generations of Nets that have gone before them.

Original poster

Celestia26 · 26/07/2018 22:26

Loving everyone's replies, hilarious! This baby is starting to get a personality too, not just a name! 😂

OP posts:

AdaColeman · 26/07/2018 22:24

Clarissa or Persephone for a girl, Rufford or Giles for a boy.

They would be EBF, only wear taupe, terracotta or burnt sienna coloured clothes, the family cat would be called Dorothy Wordsworth.

Growing up they would eat a lot of pesto pasta while secretly yearning for spam fritters.

PixelAteMe · 26/07/2018 22:19

Ptolemy and Peregrine
Jocasta and Araminta.
At a pinch, Inigo and Sylvia.

Cosmoa · 26/07/2018 22:14

Elodie was very popular when I joined last autumn!

DwangelaForever · 26/07/2018 22:12

Twins called Ophelia and Xanthe 🙄

Waterlemon · 26/07/2018 22:10

Persephone and Sebastian

Knittedfairies · 26/07/2018 22:08

They wouldn’t need a cloth nappy because he/she would be so advanced that they’d be potty-trained within the week, and then would be doing advanced calculus for fun, while translating Mandarin into Urdu.

DramaAlpaca · 26/07/2018 22:08

A girl would be Tabitha or Thea. Much loved on here for some reason. I've never met a human one of either & I hate both names.

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