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Baby names

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Original poster

Sarah / Sadie... AIBU...

37 replies

heymrsb · 08/05/2018 12:03

When we first found out we were expecting, we had a few conversations where I'd suggest names and DH would say yay or nay. Of course he would never suggest a name - this seems to be a running theme 🙄

A bit of fun because the real "arguments" wouldn't begin til we found out... oh how I wish I hadn't joked...

One of my favourite girls' names (that got the OK) was Sadie. It turned out that it was DH's gran's name - which I thought was cute. In fact, we had Sadie Ellen down as a possibility, including my gran as a middle name, too. Very country western and appreciate not to all tastes but I loved it.

As soon as we got out the hospital after finding out we were having a girl, DH started calling bump Sarah Ellen.

STOP. THE. BUS.

Apparently Sadie is from Sarah - well, Ellen is from Helen, but I didn't see why we needed to be formal! He's determined that Sadie should be a nickname, and she should be called Sarah.

It's not that I don't like the name Sarah. But it was the name of DH's first serious girlfriend when he was 17... and it just annoys me. I took exes names, or anything close, out of all consideration ... but he doesn't see it as an issue. It was 17 years ago - true - and she is nowhere to be seen, but he still mentions her from time to time (anecdotally, like 30 something's talk about our younger days 🙈) and I just don't feel it's appropriate.

To top it off, my Mum (who ALSO suggested the name Sadie at one point) now on finding out it's related to a relative - thinks bump should have her "own name" (but does agree Sadie should be a nickname from Sarah.) Never mentioned a thing about the ex situ, fuel to fire etc.

I've told DH to stop calling bump by any name, because I want to meet her before we decide - but every time I've mentioned an alternative he just states we have found a name we liked. Feel like he is the unreasonable one! I do still love Sadie but it just feels a bit tarnished now.

Other fave names I loved but were kaiboshed were:

Lyra
Rachel (Rae)
Clara
Phoebe
Naomi

Any thoughts? Am I just being too sensitive? We still have time, it's just frustrating!

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MissReginaPhilange · 09/05/2018 00:47

I won't take the Sarah chat too personally as it is a pretty pants name. What about seren. Kinda like Sarah but different Grin

Mountainsoutofmolehills · 09/05/2018 00:46

My mum wanted to call my sister Christabel, but she was too shy too, so she called her something else, not even that different - but she was annoyed at her shyness about it and mentioned it as a minor regret. Here's the thing, when you pop out that baby, and all the effort that is involved in that moment and you are there holding the baby having lived through the miracle of childbirth, this man better STFU, name her what YOU want. That's it. He will be so happy, he will do anything you say. So drop the issue, don't mention it and when you give birth you announce your choice - Sadie, Naomi... Whatever you want ;)

I also suggest that you pay for anything you can in a department store in the children's department- that way on the c/c receipt you can pass off your shoes as necessary items.

SmellsLikeMiddleAgeSpirit · 09/05/2018 00:36

Sarah is one of the most boring names on earth

This ^^ x100 (see also Megan, Laura and Claire)

Sadie is lovely.

Twelve8Ts · 08/05/2018 20:47

Love Sadie and Naomi 😊

TatianaLarina · 08/05/2018 18:33

Sarah is one of the most boring names on earth.

You’re the one risking your life to give birth to this baby - you get final say.

Tumbleted · 08/05/2018 15:34

Tell OH you’re not naming your daughter Sarah so you need to come up with a new name. Do not name your child a name you’re not comfortable with whether you’re BU or not! Don’t let him shut you down when you want to discuss it, that’s him being childish. Also, fwiw I wouldn’t be comfortable using mine or my DP ex’s names either. Think it would be a bit weird.

blairsey · 08/05/2018 12:59

If I were you, I'd find a totally different name altogether. Don't settle on Sarah nn Sadie if you are uncomfortable with it, you'll likely end up regretting it. And by the sounds of it, you won't be happy naming her Sarah - so don't.
Considering the sentimentality of the names to you both however, you could always go for [first name] Sarah Ellen [surname] or [first name] Sadie Ellen [surname]?

RedDwarves · 08/05/2018 12:51

Sadie is a diminutive of Sarah in the same way that Maggie is a diminutive of Margaret or that Lily is a diminutive of Elizabeth. That is, they are all traditionally shortened forms or nicknames for the full name and didn’t originally exist independently, but do exist as independent names now.

So your husband is correct. But you don’t have to like Sarah.

Which leaves you at an impasse. I suggest choosing one of your other names. I like Clara, Phoebe and Naomi.

userabcname · 08/05/2018 12:46

Yanbu not to call your baby a name you don't like (for whatever reason). Tell DH it's Sadie or something else entirely and Sarah is off the table.

IWannaSeeHowItEnds · 08/05/2018 12:35

Sadie and Sarah are not the same name - call your baby the name you prefer. I always think it is ridiculous to put a name on the birth certificate that you have zero intention of using.
I know a child called Sadie. So far as I am aware, it is her proper name, not a nickname.

As an aside, and totally irrelevant to your thread, I do think Sarah is a lovely name for a baby. Although it is very popular amongst 40 year olds, it is quite an unusual name for a small child.

bridgetreilly · 08/05/2018 12:29

I think you're being a bit ridiculous about the ex, tbh. But I agree that Sadie is a nicer namer.

Cosmoa · 08/05/2018 12:27

Don't go through with calling her a name you're not comfortable with! Like you said, you have time. I don't think you're being too sensitive at all!

For the record.. I thinj Sadie is a lovely name! (but not Sarah, as there are too many!!)

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