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Baby names

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Original poster

Plain and safe or exciting but controversial?

38 replies

katonic · 28/06/2017 09:03

I'm due in a couple of weeks and we've compiled a short list of names but have agreed we want to see what she looks like before committing to anything now.

My big issue however is that I'm getting quite hung up on the fact that I'm choosing a name for someone else, who has to go through their entire life with that name.

So, using a couple of names off our short list for illustration, this is what is going through my mind:

Choose a plain, safe 'normal' name like Robyn. Classic, inoffensive, totally acceptable by anyone in any situation as a real name, however I struggle to imagine any personality that goes with it. I have a really plain name, and I find it doesn't say anything about me, it's boring. I wish I had a more individual name. But could this be a benefit? She won't get any pre-judgement based on her name and can make it her own, if she's quiet and bookish or loud and outgoing she could carry anything off as her name doesn't imply anything about her.

Alternatively I could pick a much more unusual name such as Indiana. Rarely used and massively linked to a single character for pretty much all of my peers. I love that it's quirky, it sounds lovely with our surname, there are lots of nn options, and I can imagine what an 'Indiana' might be like. But will she feel it's a real drag because everyone automatically says 'Jones' when they hear her name, or it doesn't suit her personality as the image I have in my head probably won't be anything like who she turns out to be. Will people judge her (and us as her parents) for having a 'trashy/pop culture' name rather than a classic? Is it just my own longing for an interesting name that makes this option more appealing and if roles were reversed I'd be begging for something plainer!

Your opinions and experiences would be much appreciated! If you didn't use an 'exciting' name do you regret it? Or do you wish you'd gone for the safer option as you've received some negative responses to the name you picked? Do you ever feel awkward introducing your baby as something unusual?

I've tentatively discussed this with friends and family but it's so hard to know what people's real opinions are! Robyn gets 'that's nice', Indiana gets 'Jones' followed by 'that's pretty cool and I like it' (from my peers) or 'that's ridiculous' (from parents and older people). I'm just finding it so hard, as she'll be my baby for a few years but for most of her life she'll be a totally independent individual, so I want it to be her name, not my name if you see what I mean.

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flibberdee · 29/06/2017 10:19

Nina is my ABSOLUTE FAVE name. DH's sister is Nina so it's been vetoed Hmm

Also, I love Robyn. I can totally picture a Robyn full of character and I don't think it's a 'safe' name at all. Love it. Smile

Hersetta427 · 29/06/2017 10:12

I know two Indiana's (both under 6) but both are boys. I didn't know it was even considered a girls name.

WithCheesePlease · 29/06/2017 08:21

I think both are lovely- also I don't think Robyn is plain at all. In terms of Indiana... I wonder would this generation associate it with Jones? Is it not long before their time?

UsernameInvalid66 · 29/06/2017 08:16

If Robyn is really your "safe" name, I can assure you that it's not that common - I've known one person who had it as a middle name and one as a first name, both in their late teens now. And ignore anyone who says it's a boy's name as I think that spelling is much more common for a girl. If anything I think of Indiana as a boy's name!

PutThatPomBearBack · 29/06/2017 07:00

They are both beautiful names! And fwiw I dislike 'plain' names but love RobynSmile

Crunchymum · 29/06/2017 06:37

Love Indiana and it was on my list for DD. Although not one person I mentioned it to in RL actually liked it, including DP Shock

Igottastartthinkingbee · 28/06/2017 21:30

Love Erica, Nina and Robyn.

Decaffstilltastesweird · 28/06/2017 21:27

Aside from me thinking that unusual names are sometimes less memorable, (because people are too lazy to learn a name which is new to them ime, unless they have to - i.e. if they work with the person daily or something), it's not always a good thing to have a memorable name imo.

I knew a boy with a very memorable name when I was a teenager, and he was a bit of a prat. He now works in the same industry as a good friend of mine and every time his name comes up, she remembers the teenaged prat that he was! Neither of us knew him well, but because his name is unusual, we remember the name. I was probably a bit of a prat as a teenager too, but maybe people are less likely to remember my name as it's not very unusual (I hope so anyway)!

The lesson is, if you choose a very memorable name, try not to raise a prat Grin.

smartyclogs · 28/06/2017 21:16

Robyn is not a plain 'normal' name for a girl imo. Maybe for a boy.
It is obviously a unisex name now, I wouldn't consider it to be a traditional girls name at all,and I don't think there are too many Robyn's around.
I only know one, who is 15, and is affectionately called Bobbie.
She's had all the Batman/Robin Hood jokes, just as an Indiana will get the Jones jokes.
You sound as if you prefer Indiana, so go with that.

BikeRunSki · 28/06/2017 20:21

But why would you want your children to be memorable for their name? Call them what you want- Zsazsa or John or anything inbetween- but surely the thing is to make them memorable for who they are, their personalities, their nature, talents, interests?

I grew up with a marginally unusual name and hated it, even though I went to an international school in Central London and was surrounded by unusual names. I didn't want to stand out. I pretended to be called Laura, there were a few of them.

My own DC deliberately have very common, mainstream unremarkable names. Their names identify them but do not define them.

NameChange30 · 28/06/2017 20:19

Ooh India is lovely Once

AutumnRose1988 · 28/06/2017 20:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach · 28/06/2017 20:13

What about India to keep Indi as nn but avoid the jones jokes?

NameChange30 · 28/06/2017 20:13

YY to an unusual first name (preferably with nickname options) and a more classic middle name. Then they can use a nickname or the middle name if they prefer.

SpaghettiAndMeatballs · 28/06/2017 20:11

I have two kids. They both have unusual names. The first has his dad's name as a middle name (but his first name isn't easily shortenable) the second has a crazy middle name that I was obsessed with while pregnant, and an unusual first name that can be easily shortened to something common.

Neither of them have any problems, and if they ever do, its only 35 quid for an official deed poll (OK, so they go to an international school, so almost every kid has an unusual name to my ears - but when they were at school in the UK their names didn't stand out either - this is multicultural Britain after all)

MikeUniformMike · 28/06/2017 20:11

Hey, that's Mrs Ford's name, isn't it?

MikeUniformMike · 28/06/2017 20:10

I love Callista and Nina. Not so keen on the others. Leanne sounds dated. Erica just doesn't sound pretty. Robyn is quite nice. Indiana makes me think of Harrison Ford.

I vote Calista.

FizzyGreenWater · 28/06/2017 20:04

Ours have unusual names, one very much so. However - we made sure there were good short forms which were easy to spell and say. Plus, with very unusual name, a middle name alternative it would be easy for them to swap to.

I think if you go unusual, you've got a duty to give them alternatives!

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 28/06/2017 18:44

Love all your names except Leanna.

Robyn is beautiful.
Nina is great, really vivacious and I have always like Calista. You could have Cally as a diminutive which is so sweet.
Indiana is very cool but I am not sure I'd use it for a girl as I think of boy for some reason. Indie / India is on our very short shortlist if this third and final one is a boy

Congratulations whatever you decide!

aroha77 · 28/06/2017 13:13

I know an Indi. Love it

Nina is cool and not common if you wanted a compromise?

Iwasjustabouttosaythat · 28/06/2017 12:12

Indiana is nice. It matches your need of being more interesting but is easy to spell with nice shortening options. Anything too outlandish would be mean.

Don't worry about the personality a name imparts. Your baby will make that name her own. It won't be anything like you're imagining it right now, and whatever you decide you'll love it because it's hers.

RedToothBrush · 28/06/2017 12:08

Your other names:

Erica - 350th 118 babies in 2015
Emerald 2314th 11 babies in 2015
Nina 203rd 331 babies in 2015 (looks like it peaked in 2014)
Leanna 207th 19 babies in 2015 (definite trend that its declining in popularity - peaked in 1996 and then again in 2008).

Do check out names.darkgreener.com. The popularity of some names might surprise you.

Sophronia · 28/06/2017 12:06

Nina is by far the nicest name from your list.

TheSeaTheSkyTheSeaTheSkyyyyyy · 28/06/2017 12:03

I would compromise and go with exciting but safe.

RedToothBrush · 28/06/2017 11:59

I think Indiana will be most popular than you think in a couple of years. I do actually know one. There were 79 in 2015 and it ranked 549th over all.

names.darkgreener.com/#indiana

The trend is steeply upward in gaining popularity. I think it will be even ore popular in the next statistics due in Aug and will continue to grow in popularity for a good while yet.

I personally think it safer than you think. It is generational, but older people will just get used to it through exposure.

Callista and Vesper definitely are in the out there category. But not Athena. Athena is bang on trend and is currently MORE popular than Indiana with 135 in 2015 and ranked 340th.

Robyn for a boy is unusual but the Robin spelling is currently sitting at 232th with 239 in 2015. The name is gaining in popularity at the moment, but that does look to have about peaked. It has been fairly consistent in popularity for the last twenty years. That's why its pretty uncontroversial, as its fairly timeless.

I'm of the opinion that a name in the 200th - 500th ranking area which is on the rise is a nice sweet spot. Its usual enough, but people like it and its of the moment. There will be people that don't like it, but its less controversial than you think. And whatever you pick someone won't like it.