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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Baby name etiquette

36 replies

LokisSister · 17/03/2017 15:30

I never thought this would bother me.

My dc have classic names- ds is just climbing into the top 100 and ds is now in the top 10.

Pregnant with ds2. Most people know I'm having a boy but only close family know what I'm calling him.

Cousin just announced on Facebook she's having a boy and calling him The same name I've chosen. It will be the same first and last name but different middle name.

Whilst I know no one owns a name, it's upset me. She was one of the few people that knew what I was calling him and it's tainted it for me.
I'm due 10 weeks before her and I am still going to use the name (it's a modernised version of my grandad and uncles (on my mums side, she's related on my dads side) who both passed away)
I know it has no significant meaning to her which is what is annoying me the most. I've had to block her as in the past 4 days there's been over 20 posts with 'can't wait for x to be here' 'look what I've bought for x' etc and it feels like she's trying to rub it in and claim the name before I use it. I've messaged her and told her I'm upset but she's read and not replied.

Sorry, there's no meaning really to posting this but I'd rather write it here than keep it inside.

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NuffSaidSam · 17/03/2017 17:01

I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and assume that she already had this name lined up because the alternative is that she's made the massive decision of what to name her child just to annoy you. Do you think you feature that prominently in her life that she would do that?! Is she unhinged?

I would try and find another name if they're going to be at the same school, in the same year, with the same full name. It's not worth the hassle for your son or being really irritated every time you hear his name.

Original poster
LokisSister · 17/03/2017 16:58

It's nothing unique or unusual tbh, The name is Vinny. After my grandad Vincent and uncle Vince.

Surname is quite popular, begins with 'C' and is often suggested on these threads as a boys first name.

OP posts:
Notmyrealname85 · 17/03/2017 16:47

And if you've come up with great names before (and ones worth stealing!) maybe keep your options open :) what sort of styles of name do you like?

Notmyrealname85 · 17/03/2017 16:46

Honesty I hate these posts because people expect everyone to take the higher road! Ugh it drives me crazy when couples do this, it's so inconsiderate - for all they know, this could be a incredibly meaningful name to you! It just shows lack of imagination, ugh how basic

Original poster
LokisSister · 17/03/2017 16:36

Thanks. I am trying my best to ignore it but it keeps niggling I really can't believe she's being such an arse. Unless one of us moves, they'll be going to the same school and be in the same year group so I'm sitting here thinking of practicalities and how the dc will be affected whilst she's playing silly buggers on Facebook. I really don't want to change his name, and the fact that I'll be having mine first probably won't stop her calling her little boy the same name either (she's a stubborn cow, as am I)

I just wish I had have kept it to myself in the first place.

OP posts:
1horatio · 17/03/2017 16:29

Agree with everything already said.

Especially Scarlet's advice...

Pencilvester · 17/03/2017 16:28

Yes, what the others have said. I can imagine how annoying that must be for you, but do just ignore it.

Sophronia · 17/03/2017 16:24

Yes, just ignore her and use the name anyway. Especially as you're due before her.

DaisyBlameless · 17/03/2017 15:44

Ignore it.

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 · 17/03/2017 15:34

Sounds like your ds will have a nicer dm anyway!! Use the name and block her and just enjoy ds and his name!!

ScarletSienna · 17/03/2017 15:32

I think you're right. Most people don't announce the name on FB before the baby is born so the fact she has done so and so much suggests to me she is trying to 'claim' it so that people think you've copied her.

I'd still use the name and rise above it. If anyone mentions it, I'd say that she loved the name you chose so much she chose it too.