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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

My son is 9 months old but doesn't suit his name. I hate it...

92 replies

Pebbles1000 · 29/06/2016 20:49

I'm really upset but I'm not sure if it is fair to change his name. It doesn't suit him but I know that's a stupid reason. It was the only one we could agree on. My partner refused to use any other name but now claims he never said that, so I would love to use the name he said that I couldn't.

He is called Louie, we do have problems with the spelling but no pronunciation problems, luckily.

He just doesn't suit it but I don't know if that's because I have my heart set on the other name.

Everyone says I shouldn't but I don't know :(

OP posts:
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Theoldseacat · 01/07/2016 07:46

I have found your messages a little concerning. 'I am not allowed' in particular. Please don't be offended I don't know you but if you feel you need support with your relationship you can talk to your HV or GP or advice is here www.refuge.org.uk/get-help-now/help-for-women/recognising-abuse/

ProphetOfDoom · 30/06/2016 23:02

I can't quite get my head around your DP's response. If you dislike the name you've chosen, if it makes you sad & upset then his 'job' is to address this with you - because he loves you & wants your happiness. Who on earth wants a lasting sadness or regret associated with your child's name?!

downright · 30/06/2016 16:54

It sounds like your partner is the problem rather than your baby's name.

Believeitornot · 30/06/2016 16:49

A difficult time? So he gets his own way?

You might want to take a look at the relationship boards.

Original poster
Pebbles1000 · 30/06/2016 16:46

I'm not allowed to change it, never mind BlushSad

OP posts:
Groovee · 30/06/2016 16:39

I went through this! We'd called ds a name and I felt he didn't suit it. Dh refused to change it and I understood why. But now he's 13 and from about 16 months suited his name.

adagio · 30/06/2016 16:35

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Pipilangstrumpf · 30/06/2016 13:54

"He really doesn't look like a Louie!"

Really?!

Pipilangstrumpf · 30/06/2016 13:53

I'm surprised how many of you are suggesting the op changes her son's name without her partner's agreement. Surely, both parents need to want to change their child's name.

But I also feel you owe it to your son to be consistent and don't confuse him by changing what you call him without both parents agreeing to it.

user1467101855 · 30/06/2016 11:14

He has a name. You gave it to him, he exists in the world with that name, its not on to change his identity later on.

Plus if you are both on the birth cert you both need to sign to change his name, so sounds like you're out of luck there anyway.

Gummibaers · 30/06/2016 11:11

And I agree with a previous poster that Samuel Louie doesn't work that well together. It sounds like Samuel Oouie.

Gummibaers · 30/06/2016 11:09

If his dad doesn't like Samuel then you cannot change it to that imo. That would be unfair.

Your son needs a name that both parents are happy with.

However, at some point you both need to accept his name and live with your choices.

They're both good solid names imo,

Goingtobeawesome · 30/06/2016 07:32

He is that bad.

Either change now or get on with it.

Samuel is a fabulous name.

Change it.

nagsandovalballs · 30/06/2016 07:28

Er, having a tough time does not give someone the right to be demanding and controlling. Wanting to 'have your own way' is unpleasant In a child and worrying in an adult.

septembersunshine · 30/06/2016 07:14

I would change it to Samuel Louie too and gradually drop the Louie over time and just call him Sam/Samuel. I think you should just do it and make your DH understand what it means to you. I guess if you don't do it you will always be caught up with this name thing and it will always bother you.

I'm sorry you were railroaded into calling your DS a name you didn't love.

Original poster
Pebbles1000 · 29/06/2016 23:47

He really doesn't look like a Louie!

He isn't that bad, he has just had a difficult time with things, so he likes his own way

OP posts:
julfin · 29/06/2016 23:31

I think you really need to talk it through with your partner. Personally I don't think there's a problem with changing the name now (as long as you do what you can to minimise confusion). But it really depends on whether your partner is happy with Samuel and whether he'd be willing to change the name. Have a good long chat with him.

I wonder whether the boy genuinely/objectively doesn't look like a Louie or whether to some extent you just find it hard to use that name when you've never quite let go of Samuel.

tellmeofthetime · 29/06/2016 23:15

Louie Samuel sounds better to me without the two 'L's running together

Believeitornot · 29/06/2016 22:32

Your partner doesn't sound very nice to be honest. He basically played some sort of weird mind game on you.

I would change the name. Then you can rest easy.

BretonTop · 29/06/2016 22:29

I feel for you OP. I don't really like my youngest's name, and he's 2.5. I cringe inwardly when people say it out loud sometimes. Just hope I grow to like it more one day.

I agree it doesn't sound like your partner has been very fair or kind here. Sounds like he didn't give you any choice at all when naming your son? Can't believe you didn't put your foot down and put Samuel down as a middle name! (My son has my favourite boys' name as his middle name; I just didn't want to use it as his first as it's so common atm).

JessicaRabbit3 · 29/06/2016 22:13

Your do sounds controlling. Where was your choices here. As for a name growing in I doubt believe a baby suits the name they just come known by it. Took us ages to call the baby Joshua but now it's all we know him by it the last weeks we agreed on Max but had change of heart

NewStartNewName · 29/06/2016 22:12

If I wasn't such a mardy cow I'd have put it a bit more like sycamore.

hideouspain · 29/06/2016 22:09

Have you considered changing your partner?

RandomMess · 29/06/2016 22:09

Your OH sounds deeply unpleasant Sad

gonetoseeamanaboutadog · 29/06/2016 22:05

I had to chuckle at your partner's predictions that it will soon fit his face - he might be right but how can he tell?!