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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Help, I think I chose the wrong name!

93 replies

MissusBea · 07/02/2016 14:20

DD is ten months old now and I have never felt quite settled about her name. DH admits that it niggles him too. When I say her name to people over the age of 50 (and some younger) I sometimes get a reaction or slightly negative comments even. I am thinking about getting it changed - is it too late?

We called her Martha, but I am afraid that its not pretty and maybe even a little frumpy (servants name?). She's a beautiful, bright little thing. Thinking of adding the name Eleanor to the birth certificate as that seems so much more elegant and beautiful (means 'shining light', name of several Queens etc)

Honest thoughts / opinions pls! Am I overthinking this? Is it too late?

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autumnmoon · 08/02/2016 09:59

Martha is a beautiful name - i would have faith in it, she'll grow into it!

FellOutOfBedTwice · 07/02/2016 22:30

I really like it and have heard Moss used as a nickname for it which is ridiculously cool- my great auntie Martha was a Moss. I would love to have a Martha NN Moss but unfortunately, our surname rhymes with Moss and so would sound loopy.

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 07/02/2016 22:28

Martha is so pretty! We called our wee boy John, with no second name. I am like you in that I wish we had thought maybe a bit further and added another name. John is now four and has himself chosen Luke as a middle name so we are adding it by deed poll.

SpearmintLino · 07/02/2016 22:15

I absolutely love Martha. Not helpful, sorry!

hollyisalovelyname · 07/02/2016 20:48

Martha is lovely.

Original poster
MissusBea · 07/02/2016 20:37

Marisabel what did you regret ... Adding a new middle name or not changing the name fully at 5 months? Do you mind me asking how old your daughter is now?

OP posts:
Sophronia · 07/02/2016 20:03

Martha is lovely! And there are so many Eleanors and Ellies around.

Marisabel · 07/02/2016 20:03

I think your girl have a very beautiful name. But I like Eleanor too.
In your place I would add it. In my case, we are aloud to have just 1 first and 1 middle name.

Marisabel · 07/02/2016 20:00

I changed my DD name at 5 months -added a middle name. I wasn't keen on her first name and was thinking with the middle name it will work better. And I regretted it:( Still don't like her name. Feel like rubbish mother. Thinking to change her name to Sophia( wanted it from the start, but everyone said it is too popular), but not sure anymore. Ironically her current first name is popular as well.

ConesOfDunshire · 07/02/2016 19:44

Biblical Martha welcomed thirteen strangers into her home and was busy making them welcome while her sister Mary listened to Jesus. He gently admonished her for not prioritising the most important thing, ie his teachings. That's really it. There are much worse Biblical fates than that!

villainousbroodmare · 07/02/2016 19:44

If you have had ten months to consider it, and both you and your OH feel the same, then change it. It's a name, there's no absolute right or wrong, there's only feelings and instincts and associations, which are not necessarily logical, but valid still.

ifcatscouldtalk · 07/02/2016 19:36

Lots of biblical names are used. Any association with the bible wouldn't bother me at all.

Narp · 07/02/2016 19:31

I really like it. It works for an older child and an adult.

Eleanor is beautiful, but there are so many Ellies/Ellas around

Anna is nice too

Cirsium · 07/02/2016 19:30

I love Martha, it is pretty and simple and sweet but strong. We get a real mix of comments about DDs unusual name, I am really surprised by how rude people can be about something we have clearly thought about carefully. But I just say we love it and think it suits her and we are pleased she will not be one of many called it. The positive comments make up for it.

Original poster
MissusBea · 07/02/2016 19:30

Yes I was thinking to add Eleanor as a first name on the birth certificate and start using it as her name. But these comments have given me pause for thought. I don't hate the name Martha but DH and familt members weren't keen on my other choices and enthused about Martha and so I think I feel that I was influenced to choose a name that wasn't a name I had always loved but more of a new idea in the hormonal few weeks before the birth.

OP posts:
seriouslywhat · 07/02/2016 19:22

I have no idea about bible Martha... Think it's lovely.

mrsschu · 07/02/2016 19:22

Martha isn't frumpy. In my experience Martha's are either over 80 or under 6 so people in their 50's may think it's an unusual name as it's probably not the kind of name that would have been in vogue when they were having and naming babies. My grandmother's sister was called Martha but always went by May, could be a possible nn? I suppose if you're really unhappy you could change it but I'm not 100% sure what you want to do - change her name to Eleanor or just add it in as an extra name (which doesn't change anything really as far as I can see)? I'm not sure it's something I would do if she has a sibling who is already familiar with her name but that's a decision only you can make.

Original poster
MissusBea · 07/02/2016 19:20

All these positive comments about Martha are really helping me. The first negative comment I had was from my adored grandmother who passed away a couple of months ago. She said 'will she be worried and anxious like the Martha in the bible?'. Another person I care a lot about said something similar - again about the biblical Martha 'why did you call her Martha when she's so peaceful' ? but am I right in thinking that most people don't even think of that Martha - or even know the story?

OP posts:
hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 07/02/2016 19:00

I am over 50 and I love the name Martha. I think it is timeless and will grow with her, it is a name that sounds good across the ages and stages of life but if you don't like it, change it now before it is too late.

CwtchyQ · 07/02/2016 18:32

I love Martha. So lovely. I imagine a bright, charming little girl.

I would leave it personally, because it's a lovely name, but if you feel strongly, change it.

ifcatscouldtalk · 07/02/2016 18:26

Names are tricky. I chose a name that everyone was a bit meh over. Its a name that seems to of gone out of fashion & never come back. Its more common amongst people my age not my daughters. If you feel that the name is wrong then maybe change it but dont do it based on other peoples reactions. Names like martha are very grown up sounding to me, but often people do grow into their name. I personally prefer it to eleanor but it just a personal opinion. It has to be what you want.

Jw35 · 07/02/2016 18:18

Martha is a lovely classy name!
Eleanor is also lovely (I'm bias as its my sisters name and may use it myself)

Personally I wouldn't change a name after 10 months! My dd definitely knew her name by then, it would be a bit confusing all round. What if you then regret Eleanor?

SlowFJH · 07/02/2016 18:16

You should change a child's name immediately and whenever you feel it no longer reflects your own evolving tastes. Friends, family and the children themselves will only respect and admire you for this in the long run.

Ham69 · 07/02/2016 18:11

Don't change it, she's still so young. I felt uncomfortable calling my DCs their actual name for a longtime. They just looked like babies and didn't 'grow' into their names for ages. Martha is gorgeous. Eleanor is pretty but very popular and not as obvious to spell. I'm sure your DD will really suit her name the older she gets and you will love it too.

shutupandshop · 07/02/2016 18:08

Change it before it is too late