Etsuko

She did say way up thread that there was Japanese heritage. I took this to mean either she or her dp were part Japanese. She explained the pronunciation of Emiko too.

Re: pronunciation, essentially we don't know, as we don't know if the OP's family are Japanese, because she hasn't come back to the thread.

If they are Japanese, then AFAIK they're pronounced e-tsu-ko & e-mi-ko with even stress placed on each syllable (e as in 'yet', ko as in 'cough').

If they're not, and they just like the names, then they can pronounce them any which way they like

Oh god sunshine.

Clearly just one of those people that makes everything about race and now infact you are the one coming across to me as having issues with what you call the standard mums netter - white Caucasian.

What koala asked was 100 percent relevant as she very clearly said.

Ignoring all the ridiculousness about heritage (which I also think was a perfectly reasonable question), I like Emiko best.

I would instinctively pronounce them:

Eh MEE ko (with ko to rhyme with mow)
Et SUE ko (again rhyming with mow).

Probably completely wrong.

Are they pronounced Eh-MEE-ko and EH-tsu-ko (capitals being the stressed syllable)? If so, I think Emiko. It's a prettier sound and there's a good selection of nn's.

Back to the actual question...
I like Emiko, and Emi is lovely. I had a Japanese teacher called etsuko who was only about 30 though, so it doesn't sound old to me!!

Whichever you choose, those that know your daughter will quickly learn to pronounce, so it won't seem unusual after a while...

FWIW, the OP's message to Koala did come across as rather snappish and short tempered whether or not it was intended that way, in my opinion.

Blimey there are some rude Op's on baby names lately.

Oh, FFS.

It's a forum conducted in the English language, based in England. I'm pretty sure you know I didn't mean 'mumsnet is FOR ENGLISH PEOPLE ONLY!!'. Would be quite bizarre, given that I'm Australian myself

(Oh, and I'm very aware of how 'wonderfully multicultural' the UK is, thanks wiggly: partly from living in East London for 5 years, and partly just because I'm an educated adult.)

Much as I've enjoyed being patronised and treated like a racist thicko on the internet, I'm off to bed.

Context is relevant because the advice would be different

• We are both Japanese and live in Japan and the child will be educated in a Japanese schools. (In which case how modern a name is may be relevant. )

• One or both of us are Japanese and our child will be educated in English speaking schools. (In which case pronounciation by English speakers is more relevant than how modern a name is)

• Neither of us are Japanese but we like Japanese names and their meanings. (In which case how they sound to English speaking ears is most relevant)

My honest reaction? I thought those are v unusual/odd names and I don't like either. I wouldn't have a clue if it was a boy or a girl, though the pronunciation seems straightforward and as I would expect.

Once it was explained their origin and your heritage it made a lot more sense. However, that has apparently offended you, so I'm not sure why you asked. There was no need to be rude to people.

I think Emiko sounds nicer.

I prefer Emiko. I think Etsuko would be mispronounced in the UK, and it would sound horrible.

Personally, though, I would not choose a -ko name. It's fine for a little girl, but not for a grown woman IMHO!

"this is an English forum" really?

I wasn't aware Scotland had voted to leave the union already? Wales and NI were still here too at the last look.

And, as others have pointed out, the UK is wonderfully multicultural.

What a silly thing to say. HTH.

This thread has taken a turn but just wanted to come back and say I have been practising saying these names with no single syllable emphasised and literally find it impossible! So I don't know if I'm just thick or if that will happen a lot with English speakers, and if that will annoy you OP?

The other day I was going to start a thread about this, but now I won't - I adore the names Ishmael, Israel and Yannick, but won't use them as I am as English as it gets and it wouldn't work, I'm sure. However I have no problem calling my future kids Zoe/Charis/Adelaide. C'est la vie!

and it's uptight and sanctimonious to lecture posters for their reaction to the OP's comment upthread! it was their prerogative to have that reaction, no? and it could be construed as 'not your place' to defend the 'tone' of the original poster on her behalf (unless you're her?).

I'm neither English nor British myself, but I can grasp the concept of a default assumption.

Where I'm from it's rude not to ask "where are you from?". It would display an ignorant lack of curiosity!

I know an Anglo-Japanese girl called Itsuki living in the UK - people tend to assume it's pronounced It-Soo-Kee at first.
I also know a very young Emiko who has no links to Japan at all - I know her parents' extended family thought it was a bit odd at first but everyone's fine with it now.

Sunshine, it was a dismissive and curt response to a reasonable question from someone genuinely trying to engage in a discussion imo. I think giving a Japanese name to a child with no link to Japan would be odd, as do several others it would seem. Obviously you don't which is also fine.

British-based forum is very different English forum though. It's naive and a bit offensive to assume that the default setting for every poster here is Caucasian and English.
I'm interested that so many people found the OP's response rude or snippy. I didn't (but then I don't think tone is well conveyed by the written word)
Is the consensus then that all posters wishing for opinions on a non-traditional English name should also state their ethnicity so that we can evaluate it in the right context (English Caucasian posters are of course exempt as the 'default' for this site)

Ummm no, some people thought the OP's response was rude. And I think you're having a massive overreaction.

it was the OP's own snippy response that set the tone, so, over reactions all round.

and of course it's a British forum. There's a bit picture of David Cameron on the home page. Bleurgh.

Right good oh
So just to clarify
OP was rude for trying to keep her heritage out of it.
This is an English forum for English people
And I'm a 'moron' for defending OP's right to construct her post as she wishes and not subscribing to the 'English forum for English people' mentality
It's all a bit Royston Vasey for me I'm afraid, or a bit playground at least. Thought this was about baby naming rather than name-calling.

Wowser, I thought koala's question was fine! I don't like either name but I'm not Japanese and have never heard of them before.

Might not be relevant but Suki would be a weird nn for Etsuko as it is E-tsu-ko. There is no Su in there. It's tsu like in tsunami. But of course it probably doesn't matter in the UK just really weird for any Japanese speakers you happen to meet.

My daughter's middle name is Mairi and we spent a lot of time researching the correct spelling etc But I appreciate not everyone does. A lot of names have been altered from their original form and cultural origin.

I prefer Etsuko and Suki is a lovely NN. I don't think it matters if it seems a bit old hat by Japanese standards. 99.99% of people in this country will have absolutely no idea what is trendy or naff in Japan!

I must be honest though, I do think it is very odd and clunky to give a child a name from a totally different culture/language to their own if they don't share any of that heritage. But in your case that is not an issue.

Etsuko is lovely.

Bun fight aside, is this a UK Forum?