DH really wants to use his late mum's name...

I would definitely use Maisie if you like it, as it will mean a lot to your dh, and will probably help him in his grief. Your dd will make the name her own very quickly.

Tribute, my arse! It's, 'I don't have the balls to name the child after X, so I'll tack it in there where no one will really see it, anyhow.'

What utter nonsense. DD has two middle names. One for each of her maternal great grandmothers. No cop out whatsoever. And guess what - one of her great grandmothers was a Frances and, oddly enough, wasn't a hamster. I chose all of her names with care, attention and love. Probably just like you chose your children's names.

IMO Frances is a crap name for a hamster, they should all be called Hammy. (see how I presented that as opinion rather than trying to make out it's a fact?)

Oh dear DD2's middle name is Frances, after my MIL. She doesn't look like a hamster.

I would use Maisie as middle name

M dh wanted his fathers name for our DS and I went ith it, I'm happy with it end I suppose glad the name has meaning.

Expecting again and dh is hinting at either his grandmothers name or male version of his mothers. Now I put the foot down. I'm choosing this name. Straight away he agreed and realised it wasn't on.

To use Mary as a middle name is a great compromise.

ooh if you have a Marina already, I'd be quite wary of using Maisie as a first name - they're quite similar as names go and it would be a pain having two 'Miss M RosieleaSurnames' in the household! That would be another vote for using Maisie as a middle name - if I was dd called Marina and a baby came along called Maisie I'd feel quite hurt that my parents had had to call her something so similar to me when there were so many other names out there to choose from.

My dsis has 3 dd, last two have names that start with the same sound (albeit they do have a different first initial, one is a J and the other a G but both pronounced the same). BIL pushed last name through despite sis not being very keen (even less keen when she discovered it was the name of his first girlfriend but that was after the christening so a bit late to change!) and everybody is forever tripping up over their names, no matter how good your intentions are, it's so easily done. And then the more you think about it the worse it gets! Depending on what you're calling them for - sometimes they will both answer (say, if the question is do you want some chocolate) or sometimes they won't (if you're trying to hurry them up or get them to do something). They also both answer to assorted amalgams of their names - when they want to... The differences between their names are very similar to the differences between Marina and Maisie (but with a G-m and a J-s) so they look different enough on paper but in real life when using them - much too similar!

It's definitely another thing to think about...

My granny gave my mum exactly the same name as her own. My mum gave me her name (or maybe it was my granny's name - hard to tell) as my middle name.

For this I thank her gratefully. Having it as a middle name is one thing. Being lumbered with it as a first name quite another. My mum certainly wasn't happy about it and never uses it in its proper form.

Luckily Maisie is not out of place today.

It is the DC who will have to live with her name when she is a teen and a 40 year old.

Frances is a lovely name for a pocket pet. Like a silky hamster.

My Granny was Frances Marina btw so I'm a little biased.

I really like Frances Mary, (not so keen on Maisie) my Uncle was named George after his father but was always called Albert, his middle name so sometimes middle names get used as first names
Each to their own, I like middle names and think most people put a lot of thought into all their DCs names.

It's a cop out because who ever uses their middle name except on exam papers and passports. Tribute, my arse! It's, 'I don't have the balls to name the child after X, so I'll tack it in there where no one will really see it, anyhow.'

Yes, that is my opinion. Flame away.

You don't want to use Mary or Maisie as a forename, so just tell him that.

If he were suggesting it as the poxy middle name he'd have said so.

Prepares for all the indignant posts over a hypothetical situation since the child may well be a boy.

Across the ages most/all? families have had people in different generations with the same names and they managed fine differentiating between them.

Also using it as a middle name is a perfectly sensible, acceptable and common way of honouring family members from other generations. Your dh may be happy with that or may prefer it as a first name.

Of course when she is born you both might look at her and say, oh, she's not a Maisie or a Mary!

Did you say it might be a boy?

In Ireland Mary is/was not uncommon as a middle name for boys, IIRC. Not so much in other places.

Will it matter in a couple of years that you didn't do the name choosing? If he has strong feelings on the matter I think that trumps flicking through name books and trying on names.

Rosielea- it isn't a cop out to use a relatives name as a MN, my father died last yr, I'm choosing names for my DC1,as much as I love my dad,I'm Not a fan of his name, so I am. Using it as a MN. You and your OH can name your baby how you want!

I love Alice Mary, equally love Maisie Alice xx

I don't get the middle me as copout comment either
Ds has my brothers first nameas his middle name. He died on the day I foun d out I was pregnant
Dd doesn't have a middle name as ds'has such significance for me that I found I just couldn't choose one for her that had yhecsame dignificance

Alice Mary and Frances Mary are both lovely.

Incidentally my dad is named after his dead uncle (same first and middle names ) and says he was quite freaked out by the whole idea as a child. I like family names as middle names but not keen for first names really.

No, itsnot selfish to want ti choose your own childs name. Which is why the dads opinion is important, its his kid too!

Middle names are NOT a cop out. I know somebody who lost her sister a few months before giving birth. The baby has her sister's name as a middle name and her 'own' name first. That isn't a cop out at all, it's a lovely tribute.

Tbh Op I would see if you and dh can find anything you like more than Maisie and if not then go with Mary known as Maisie. It's v pretty.

So they will create their own associations!
I love Maisie.
I love Maisie Alice.
I'm a firm believer in using family names. It is a link between the generations.