Friends 'nicking' baby names... sort of!

Use the names. I would be quite chuffed if someone used the same name as us. Means they love it too and that my child hasn't put them off it.

See, I think you're wrong to assume your friends used the names because YOU mentioned them. Maybe they'd loved the names for years and years before you revealed them on your "list". Maybe they will be very surprised to find out you think you "told them" about these names.

There were two Joseph's and two Chloe's among my friends. It really was fine.

Don't ask before hand.

Use the names you like best. Ignore the fact someone got there first p

You don't need to ask permission just use whatever you like.

Yes agree don't ask opinions. Wait till the birth and after tell everyone it's name. That way it's not up for discussion.

Call the baby your number one name. I can't see a problem

Don't be testing the waters- this is not a committee decision! Just use the name you like best.

Use the names if you really like them and nothing else will do. Please don't worry. I also would not mention it to your friends either. Instead I would just announce baby x has been born etc. If they question it, you can just say, well you know of course that I have always loved x name. If you ask their permission beforehand, you give them the option to object and then what will you do?

Out of interest what are the name? Go on tell us. We can tell you if they are top 100 or not.

Seriously, you might drift apart in the next few years and never see each other again. Don't worry about it.

For me the issue is just the classic "can I use the same name" as the fact you told them names you like before is irrelevant. Telling someone you like a name isn't like making a table reservation.
My friend always had her top name, if I had a boy I wouldn't have used it anyway as it wasn't my taste but in the end she didn't even us it when she had a boy. So your friends couldn't keep your name in reservation until you released it to them as you decided actually it wasn't the one (or one from a list).

Someone said about giving a name to be unique but I don't think being unique in a small group of friends is unique as one day they will explore the world and come across lots with the same name. So on that basis, you should use the name.
However as you can see from the posts here, there are mixed feelings on the idea so be prepared for one of your friends to be unhappy just incase. It's not rational but they just might be upset.

Kids often love having the same name too. My DD is in a new class with another Esmeralda (May not be her real name) and they have become instant, firm friends.

When I had ds, and was phoning round to tell people, one friend went all quiet and said "that's the name we like best". I told her I didn't mind at all, and she used it for her ds2, born 6 weeks later.

I didn't think we'd see them that often as they lived overseas, but after she and her h separated, she and her boys moved fairly close to us. My A and her A get on great, even look very alike, have been mistaken for twins! And they love saying "Hello A" "Hello A" "How are you A?" "I'm fine, how are you, A?" (Even though they're both 12!!).

Doesn't matter if name is unusual Or not.no one has dibs on a name
It's really v silly and precious to feel ownership if a name
Reminds me of Charlotte satc when she had huff after her baby name "stolen"

Use the names you like. Don't discuss it with them either, just name them when they are born. You need to realise that your friends may not even remember you telling them the names.

Did you not consider this situation could happen when you told them the names? I've always suggested names further down my a favourite list when people have asked for advice. I don't think that is being precious, just looking ahead to avoid problems like this.

If the names aren't unusual, go ahead. I would think it strange if a friend used DD's name but it's very rare so I think that would be more out of surprise than anything.

If we're talking Top 50 names though it really won't matter t all.

Use them. Even if your friends are secretly annoyed they will get over it in no time!

We name our kids so they can be identified, and as there are thousands of names to choose from that I would not use the same name that my friends have named their child. You even state that you'd be annoyed if they had 'copied' you, so they will feel the same if you choose their kids' names.

I would use it, they can't get an arse on about it because you did tell them in advance of them using it that it was your favourite name.

If they live that far away, they aren't going to be a big part of your day to day lives, and it's likely that your DCs won't see much of theirs.

I would tell them in advance you'll still use your first choice name, and remind them you told them you liked in before they used it. They probably will be a bit miffed, but that's their problem, it's not like they didn't know you liked it!

There's no name etiquette.no one has dibs on a name.and that's end of it

My DC3 has the same name as several of my friends DC.

They honestly did not mind at all. A few said they were flattered.

I have a 3 year old Caspar and my step sister is pregnant and asked if we would mind them using the same name, with a different spelling. I don't mind.

If they are pretty common classic names I would use them. A friend of mine has 2 DC, they were both given names that other mutual friends had used a few months earlier! But they are classic names, think William and Sophie for example, so noone really batted an eyelid.