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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

<WAILS> she's unwittingly nicked my boy name!! <sob>

180 replies

UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 06/10/2013 19:07

We had decided on Rufus Caspar.

It was perfect.

We knew no other child with the name,it creates the NN Ru which I adore (can't use rupert or Reuben either),it's not popular but not unknown,it has no terrible associations,it goes brilliantly with our other DC names,and it's cool dammit.

But now a sort-of-relative-family-friend has used it for her PFB,and it will look like we've copied and I know it's childish but I do care about that for some reason.

It's taken me months to settle on a name and now I have to start all over again

It's Not Fair!

HELP ME

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wiltingfast · 07/10/2013 21:20

Raoul?

Doesn't really give you a Ru but has similar sounding vowels grasping straws

No way I'd want to use the name either. It's NOT just your hormones!

Or use Casper as a fn? You could call him Caz, I think that's kinda cool... Cooler than Rufus really...

liquidstate · 07/10/2013 21:01

Just use what you have chosen.

Honestly even if they were close friends and relatives it wouldnt matter. Trust me, my lifelong best friend was given my name and she was born a few months after me. We are cousins and her parents had set their heart on the name I was given.

sleepingbeautiful · 07/10/2013 20:41

I understand why you feel how you feel OP. I remember our first choice girl's name being taken out in a similar circumstance. It's not as bad if you've picked a top 50 name as people expect to meet several little "Xs".

How about:
Coen
Boyd
Roman
Jed
Cornelius
Asher
Darius
Lennox
Selwyn
Eric
Linden/Lyndon
Ramsey
Reid

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 07/10/2013 20:26

Rooney?

No, go back to Rufus.

Original poster
UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 07/10/2013 20:17

Raphael is a bit too biblical for us...and waaaaaay to long for our sir name.

I do love the NN Raffy though.

OP posts:
fuzzle · 07/10/2013 20:01

I second Raphael its great

Raphael Casper
Joshua Rufus
Oscar Rufus
Finn Rufus
Robert Casper (nn Roo)
Stephen Rufus
Owen Casper
Christopher Rufus
Samuel Rufus
Patrick Casper
Gabriel Rufus
Sebastien Rufus
Elijah Raphael

Original poster
UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 07/10/2013 19:53

THIS is why I wanted the baby names sorted before all the pregnancy hormones kicked in.

OP posts:
Original poster
UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 07/10/2013 19:52

The thing is Girls if it was t'other way round,I'd feel exactly as you did...

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GirlsTimesThree · 07/10/2013 19:52

I don't understand this at all. We named our DD3 and a couple of months later our friend had her DD3. She came to me and asked if I'd mind if she used the same name we'd chosen.
I was surprised she felt she had to ask and told her I had no problem at all, it was her baby, she could name her anything she wanted!
I felt it showed we both had good taste...

Inglori0us · 07/10/2013 19:48

Use it anyway. Tell them now that you'd already picked it. If you're not that close to them it'll be fine.

Original poster
UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 07/10/2013 19:39

I don't care if there are other kids called Rufus,of course I don't.

It's only because this one will be in close contact with many of my relatives and has been named before any one knew it was our chosen name,so it looks like we've nicked it.

And what on earth do you mean by Also, if you are like this over a NAME what are you going to be like when the baby arrives. ?!

BestisWest is your sons name quite often used or rarer? The problem here is that everyone was quite surprised by the name in question,as they hadn't heard it used in a long time,therefore two within two months would stand out I'm sure.

DP does not like Rudyard...nor do I think it goes particularly with the other DC names...which is unfortunate, as its pretty cool.

Gah! I think I'm going back to the drawing board again

OP posts:
BestIsWest · 07/10/2013 15:39

I know a Ruhan. But I would go with your first choice. Two of my relatives used DS name after he was born and I don't think anyone thought they were copying me or even gave it a second thought.

madeleinetheragdoll · 07/10/2013 15:22

Bruno?

handcream · 07/10/2013 15:13

Caspar is my PIL's dogs name....

Also, if you are like this over a NAME what are you going to be like when the baby arrives. I had a SIL who when we were expecting thought she'd 'reserve' a name so that we didnt use it! I felt like using it anyway.

Later on I found that this is actually quite common to tell close relatives even before you are pregnant not to use YOUR name....

ziggiestardust · 07/10/2013 15:10

Just as an aside; our neighbour has a dog named Caspar, and when he shouts his name in an exasperated sort of way (frequent) it sounds an awful lot like 'cashback'.

You wouldn't like a son called cashback now, would you?

There, there.

WhatchaMaCalllit · 07/10/2013 15:04

I don't know if there is background threads in relation to deciding a name but seriously - there will be other people in the world with the name that you give your child. Somewhere, out there, a child who will grow up to be an adult will have the same name as someone else.

Use the name you want to use.

So what if someone else used it. You use it too. Someone else will use it after you. Be happy with your choice & stand by it!

MerryMarigold · 07/10/2013 14:56

Noel?

Original poster
UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 07/10/2013 14:54

I'm 31 weeks pregnant.

I have no grip left.

OP posts:
AvonCallingBarksdale · 07/10/2013 14:53

Good Lord, woman! Get a sturdy grip. This was the name you decided on. Unless you are going to entertain the idea of a different name and from this thread it doesn't sound like it Wink you have to use it. End, as they say, of!

HavantGuard · 07/10/2013 14:52

Euan/Ewan?
Ted?
Lucas?
Otis?

Floggingmolly · 07/10/2013 14:47

It was not perfect. She's done your son you a favour.

MerryMarigold · 07/10/2013 14:44

PS. It will look like copying, and whenever anyone in the extended fam refers to your son, they will have to say, "Rufus, you know....Frigg's Rufus..."

MerryMarigold · 07/10/2013 14:41

Rudyard mentioned somewhere ^

I think it's waaaay better than Rufus. Just got so much gravitas AND style.

Do love Rudy too - shame about the cat!

Queen0fFlamingEverything · 07/10/2013 14:29

I know a (teenage) Ruadhan - would that work?

Original poster
UpTheFRIGGinDuff · 07/10/2013 14:24

Ralph that is so weird.

Ewart is the name of our terrace of houses. I'd never heard the name before then.

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