WDYD if DH just won't budge?

After going through childbirth I get final say on any name! I would never have gone with a name dh hated but did have dd1 with dh hoping we'd go for Eve - once she was born and 32 stitches later dh decided it was my choice. I suggested the name I'd loved for years but had forgotten about and he loved it to (mind you I think he wouldn't have dared not love it).

A friend of mine wanted to call her ds a name and her dh overruled her so her 1st name became his middle name and her dh's name choice was ds 1st name - I was stunned and she was upset. I thought she was pathetic and he was an arse.

I was heartbroken (pregnancy hormones) when DH vetoed my first choice but if you don't agree on a name it is off the table. Back to the drawing board.

You are going to have to learn how to communicate and work on reaching agreements or your life as parents is going to be harder than it needs to be.

Croc's plan is genius.

Has your dh seen the pregnant teen film? If not I would watch it to see if you can put him off.

It's the fact that the OP is posting on here asking what to do that signifies a bigger problem.

I mean, the obvious answer - and the one we'd all employ - is just to say, 'no, I don't like that name, and you don't get to make a unilateral decision' (or something slightly less pompous, but words to that effect ), but the OP obviously doesn't feel she can do that.

This is really what makes her DH seem like such an arse...

Juno's a border collie I'm afraid. It's a real sheepdog's name.

I would perhaps inform the midwives that the registration docs are to be given to you when he is not around!

I don't get the 'not budging'. You don't like the name = it's not happening. Same as if he hated a choice of yours. He can not budge all he likes- she won't get registered until there is a name chosen that both of you approve of.

He sounds like a childish bully.

do you mean Inday (in -dye) or indi (in-dee)?
why not give him a taste of his own medicine. tell him you heard a gorgeous name today, (choose 1 he'll hate) and stick with it till he agrees to compromise then say the only name that even comes close is indi :)

Juno is OK, but with Juno-esque as a euphemism for "fat" you'd have to spend years praying that she didn't go through an awkward puppy-fat stage in her teens.

Why don't you start making jokes about his name choice...

'Juno what I'd like for dinner tonight?'

'Juno what I'd really like to call the baby?'

'Juno what I reckon it should be called if it turns out to be a boy?'

Would that put him off it? However, IMHO Juno is a far nicer nicer name than Indi!

Juno is terrible, sorry.

You could always be the one to sneak off and register the name

Juno is awful- but at least it's a name. Indi is just 4 random letters.

I'd inform him that if he doesn't grow up and discuss the names, HE will be the one without a choice and you'll go and register the child under the name you like when it's born. You don't actually have to do this, its an unpleasant thing to do, but if he's being unpleasant too...

If you don't like the name, don't use it - and let him know that if there had been discussion, you may have come round to it, but his behavior has ruined the name now so that's that, its off the table, and he'd better get in on the decision as to what the name will be.

He sounds like an absolute arse.

Naming a child is a joint decision. It's not a contest to see who can be the most stubborn.

I can't quite believe your thread title - 'What would you do if DH just won't budge?'

I mean, deciding on a name for your baby is the least of your worries, surely?!

If he's not usually like this, then just do whatever you normally do that works to change his mind.

Or, what anyone else in this situation would do [states the bleeding obvious]: just say, 'no, I don't like the name and I don't want to call my DD it'. Practice a few times beforehand, if you think it might help.

If he is usually like this, then hell, none of us can help you out, and instead can only wonder remotely why you'd be with him.

I'm being a bit OTT probably, but I'd be way too embarrassed to start a thread like this - it is about so much more than just your baby's name. Your DH is an arse.

And just in case, if it isn't entirely clear from my vitriolic little post - it is not up to him to have the final say on this. It's not up to you either (although as the one gestating the baby for 9 months and then giving birth to it, there's a fairly robust argument that it could be). It's up to both of you to agree.

Juno is awful.

Why on earth would you consider giving your child a name that you don't like? Just tell him that you hate the name so you will both have to agree on a name that you both like.

If you really don't like it don't agree to it.

Really dislike Indi. It's not a proper name.

I don't get the big deal about names as I was a lot less bothered about chosing them, and what they would eventually be called, than I thought I would. Out of the 6 names my kids have dh chose 4, DS1 chose one and me one. Having said that if you don't want it then he can't have it.

LaTristesse - could you name your daughter something like
Albia
Clio
Delia
Gaia
Hera
Hermia
Ione
India
Indiana
Ismay
Ivy
Jana
Joan
Jude
Judith
Julia
Juliana
Julienne
Juliet
June
Junia
Juniper
Luna
Pax
Sula
Vida
Zora?

Tried to think of some other jaunty four-letter names like Indi and Juno for you.

My sister recommended waiting till you look at your baby for the first time, just after you've given birth to say 'darling Trixiebelle (insert name of your choice) isn't she just perfect DH'. Then he can't back down from your choice.

He has to budge because you vetoed it! I would not say anything further on the matter for the moment. Just assume he's got the message. And don't push him on alternative names for a few days, maybe? I think I'd leave it for a little while and then have another look at your list together.

As DialMforMummy says -- just say No. No, she will not be named Juno. When he is prepared to accept that, he can come and talk and you can discuss what she will be called.

It's a girl's name, all right - Roman goddess of the hearth and matronly things. Wife of Jupiter, prone to jealousy, massive strops and causing trouble for women who caught his eye.

I wouldn't go for it, myself.