To not want my kids grandparents to sleep naked with him.

I wouldn't feel happy with it, but it's a tricky one because you say that your kids are staying overnight in their house, and your child gets into bed with them. So it's not as if he's being invited in.
You are basically going to be asking them to change their habits, in their house, so that they can babysit your children overnight.

Hmm, tricky! Think you'll just have to bite the bullet and say what you feel and be prepared to find another babysitter if they are offended. Presumably if you all stay overnight, this isn't an issue because your son would get in your bed?

I have to say I am at the idea that nudity = sexual abuse. What is being said with regard to parent's /grandparents is that as THEIR children we do not trust our parents NOT to abuse our children, does that mean we didn't trust them as parents? or that society has made such an issue of publicising so many cases of child abuse. Now i am not saying this is a bad thing BUT letting it affect us to such a level is a bad thing.

My parents were very repressed about nudity. I grew up thinking naked bodies were dirty. It has been a long struggle losing the baggage I have from this. The idea that nudity always equals depravity/perversion is not IMO a healthy one to pass on to children.

The thing about grandfathers abusing their GCS. If it is what they want to do, they;re going to find a way to do it. And probably the time they won't do it is when the grandmother is in the bed as well.

Erections can be felt through pajamas too. Men are perfectly capable of not prodding all and sundry if they have an erection in the morning.

I can see why people are squeamish about it - we are British afer all while the GPs in this case are swedish and may have different cultural norms which are clashing with the OPs. That does not make them perverts.

If people disagree with this on the grounds that it might lead to sexual abuse then that is an argument for not leaving children alone with grandparents at all.

oh yes jack,the nipple twanging IS a problem..i have gargantuan baps,that manage to escape from my vest top when am lying down.the lo's think it great to see what resembles a bun with a cherry on top,and try to remove said cherry...owwwwwwwwwwwww

Hmm, I wouldn't like it with my IL's or mum, but I know they all sleep in pj's so would be outside what I know is normal IYSWIM.
WRT myuself, DH and I do sleep in the nude but put clothes on if DD's get into our bed as they have no personal boundaries (and I don't like having my nipples pinged by a 4 yo) but we shower and dress in front of them no problem.

Well we sleep naked with dd (2.2yo) and for the last 6 months she has though it is great fun to snog me! No tongues obv, in case anyone needs that clarifying, but a perfect 1970s tv drama snog - press closed mouth together for as long as you can without suffocating! I frequently do nearly suffocate but she won't let go

As to the op I have to reserve judgement. The idea of either set of gps sleeping naked is so absurd I can't imagine it. I don't think it would bother me.

this isn't going to be resolved is it?
kerry i'm very sorry for you,your experiences have obviously coloured your veiws on subjects like this,and made it hard to be objective..and understandably so.

david wtf?!!you strange person

...my final take on it is that however innocent it is,and it invariably will be...the gc's will probably be like,"eyyyyw, i saw granny and grandad's bits!" when they are 13 or 14!
i know i'd be mortified at that age to recall seeing my granma's fanjo!

i remember seeing my mum putting talc on her big 80's bush...and it still makes me shudder

Blimey, no wonder us English are said to be repressed. I despair! It's a naked body. We've all got one, we all pretty much look the same be we men or women. Why on earth are some people so damn precious about it??

Grandparents aren't necessarily elderly though. A 45 year old could quite easily be the grandmother of an 8 year old.

body fluids: the main body fluids produced in the night are saliva and sweat. Post-menopausal women do not have many vaginal secretions and eldery men do not usually wake with erections. The body fluids objection is daft.

And I'm not having a sense of humour failure, motherbeyond, I'm responding to posters suggesting that there is something disgusting about elderly bodies.

ignore david everyone...he is a 14 yo with a stiffy

Well, I don't let my children sleep with any grandfather, just my dad .

Message deleted

I don't think they're being unreasonable, I'm genuinely surprised that this is something people worry about - if the GP's aren't uncomfortable why would anyone else be?

If my DD had got into bed with my parents and any of them were nude (my DD sometimes sleeps naked) I just wouldn't consider it an issue. Again, I'm not judging just didn't realise so many people were unhappy with the idea.

But I also hadn't thought about the kissing children on the lips thing...

dunder (and others)

you are missing the point

your parents may have slept in the nude and invited you, as a child, into their bed

you are comfortable with your own kids in your bed

your childrens grandparents are not their parents

there is a difference...some people are posting as if it makes no difference at all...but clearly, it does for many people

and those people are NBU

I'm so surprised by this - I find it strange that so many people think it's a problem. (Not judging!)

My DC stay over with my parents' and my parents always used to sleep naked when we were kids so maybe they do the same now.

I don't think twice about being naked in front of my children (in bed or otherwise)and nor does my husband.

My instinct with this is that it's not really the right thing to do. I think that's a mixture of cultural upbringing as well as a bit of Kerry's point about waking up next to grandfather with an erection. And the whole bodily fluids issue. Ugh.

Given some of the threads on here about social services, I do have an honest question. What would be the opinion of professionals on sleeping naked with grandparents? I suspect it could be viewed in quite a grim light? Not saying that's right or wrong either way.

yanbu bit weird tbh

neenz, my ex h is from a mediterranean country, and children there get kissed like anything, by any old stranger, male or female. So we have a no kissing on the lips rule, our children are not kissed on the mouth, full stop.

I think there is a real difference between being open about nudity and encouraging your child to be confidant about their own bodies and actual naked physical contact.

YANBU - My DD stays at my PIL all the time and I would not feel comfortable with this at all. Why does it need to happen? My Dh puts clothes on if DD joins us in bed as he thinks it is totally inappropriate and wouldn't want DD (23 months) to take an interest in such close circumstances!!

Hope that makes sense.

I love to kiss DS on the lips. DH sleeps naked and I do sometimes, and I never try to hide my naked flesh from DS, but I would not feel comfortable with the OP's situation.