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AIBU?

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Original poster

Why do certain posters think a topic in AIBU a green light for them to be an absolute c

83 replies

MamaG · 09/10/2009 09:38

unt?

THERE'S NO NEED TO BE SO FUCKING MEAN

I loved AIBU at first, but now I hate it, I think posters are unecessarily nasty in it.

OP posts:
wannaBe · 09/10/2009 10:11

Ibu has almost become a free-for-all where people seem to think they can say what they want because it's ibu, and if the poster doesn't like it, well they shouldn't have posted in ibu.

I agree it creates a really unpleasant tone across the boards. Mn used to have a reputation for being somewhere where people could post freely and where you weren't expected to be fluffy, but now I think it's gone beyond that, to somewhere where open and honest discussion has turned into accepted nastyness.

I don't like the "well if you don't like it hide the topic/go somewhere else" attitude either. So the message is that "people can be as nasty as they want, it's the responsibility of those who are the targets to hide/walk away." I go on another site that has an ignore feature where you can ignore board posts, instant messages, private messages etc, and this is constantly thrown at people as a solution if they are being badly treated on the site. Consequently the most horrendous bullying and abuse takes place, and if people don't like it they are simply told to ignore it. Not on at all.

Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 10:11

and how did you feel dp? Did you feel it was justified? Or did you think

a) hang on a mo, thats a bit harsh
b) Fark the lot of you

OP posts:
Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 10:10

This is how to start a thread in the hope that you're ignored

I don't think we should water down MN as such, just think before we post and not be so MEAN, there are ways to get your point across without being vicious

OP posts:
daftpunk · 09/10/2009 10:08

actually mamag.....i have been totally ripped apart on a few aibu....left for dead..

bibbitybobbityCAT · 09/10/2009 10:07

Agree, AIBU seems to attract the irrational ranty angry posters (and I include myself in that sometimes ).

I think we should call people on being pointlessly aggressive more often - daftpunk's post on this thread is a case in point - even if we are not the op or the direct target of the aggressor's spite.

I am all for healthy debate, I think AIBU is a good topic, I fully understand that people get genuinly angry about things and need to vent. I would hate Mumsnet to be watered down to something like Netmums.

But I agree with you MamaG.

MmeGoblindt · 09/10/2009 10:07

I agree that AIBU brings out the cuntishness in certain posters.

Honesty is good, it is such an important part of MN, but sometimes the comments are just nasty and hurtful.

GetOrfMoiLand · 09/10/2009 10:07

I like AIBU. My favourites are parking in mother and toddler bays threads.

Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 10:06

I know dp, I know, its all good

OP posts:
daftpunk · 09/10/2009 10:05

aitch....i love aibu it's the best bit of MN..

Mamag....i'm joking with you..

kiss kiss

Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 10:04

Ah but I've got a shotgun daftpunk

OP posts:
WhereTheWildThingsWere · 09/10/2009 10:03

Realised I have just been drawn into an AIBU thread, and should probably be SHOUTING and calling everyone a cunting motherfucker, or I am not likely to be noticed.

daftpunk · 09/10/2009 10:03

MamaG....do you wanna fight about it..

do ya...do ya..!

cos i'll win...

AitchTwoToTangOh · 09/10/2009 10:02

"you have started this thread to draw attention to yourself imo."

lol, dp, you mean unlike all the other threads that people start on MN with the express intention of being ignored?

diddl · 09/10/2009 10:02

I guess you´ll have to ask the "certain posters"?

And your language and shouting in the OP makes you sound like one of them, tbh.

So, IMO,YABU.

Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 10:01

I think the "hide the topic, go to netmums" answers are a bit lame too btw

OP posts:
WhereTheWildThingsWere · 09/10/2009 10:01

I stay well clear as a rule, I think lots just use it as an excuse for a big barney.

Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 10:01

Yes me too Aitch. I don't always check the topic before I click on teh thread.

daftpunk - no, I haven't, I was reading a couple of AIBUs and felt cross about it. I think people sometimes need to stop and think before they post.

I do like a good thread with lots of different POVs, but when posters come on a thread just to be mean? I don't think its on. I don't think that everybody who posts a thread in AIBU does so with a hard hat on, some genuinely want advice, not a flaming.

OP posts:
JeminTheDungeon · 09/10/2009 09:58

I often think that people can be needlessly harsh in AIBU.

You often get different points of view though, which is always interesting.

LittleHarrysMum · 09/10/2009 09:58

LOL at cunty!! Will keep that stored for another time

I agree with you MamaG. YANBU

daftpunk · 09/10/2009 09:58

yes mamag and other posters are well within their rights to tell you to go to netmums if you're not happy...if you don't like aibu..hide the topic and stop bloody moaning...you have started this thread to draw attention to yourself imo.

twirlymum · 09/10/2009 09:57

As the topics are in alphabetical order, it's always at the top.

AitchTwoToTangOh · 09/10/2009 09:57

tbh i always use active convos, so it's only when i'm on a thread and utterly horrified at the way it's going that i look up and see, aaaaaah, it's AIBU.

Original poster
MamaG · 09/10/2009 09:55

kat2907 - what a ridiculous comment "there are other boards". I've been posting on MN for 5 years and I think I'm quite within my rights to say that I don't like a topic and I think some posters can be unecessarily harsh.

some of the people who post in AIBU ARE being cunty!

OP posts:
2kidzandi · 09/10/2009 09:54

It allows people to vent their stresses at someone else who (they assume) is game for it if they post in AIBU? That's how I explain it.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 09/10/2009 09:54

yy

I seem to recall MNHQ saying that AIBU gets waaaay more hits than any other part of MN, so from an income from ads pov it's here to stay

JK indeed