Why do certain posters think a topic in AIBU a green light for them to be an absolute c

yeah get a backbone mamaG

aibu asks for it

it was meant to be satirical irony - was it not?
then the newbs came and took the whole thing literally and now cry like BIG FAT BABIES.

if you want a serious answer to a serious question DO NOT POST in aibu

curious the bile and derogatory terms used to describe others on aibu -not self of course.as it dem other bigger gerls being chavs not you of course.oh no the mn neutral ohwelliverynever posters see the foaming groaning herd,yet remain impervious

aye right

when i first came on here 6 months ago i had no idea aibu could be so nasty - i was so horrified i didn't revisit until about a month ago & of course I get it now. When you're a new mum and hormonal and think you are going somewhere for support i think it can be ghastly. There are also some utter wankers who, on the most reasonable aibu, turn nasty and bullying... like some vile pack of chavvy school girls.

I am endlessly fascinated by the seemingly innocuous OPs which turn into unadulterated vicious bile.

They are brilliant.

I also think we need to coin a law akin to Godwin's- ie that at some point during any given thread, the argument turns to breastfeeding. That's when it all kicks off

AIBU - is a question asking to be judged ... and found wanting ...

There is also a WWYD - for advice and a more open debate ... yes???

There are just too many threads and topics on MN and IMHO some need to be edited and others should disappear ... I think often posters wrongly just hit the default AIBU/CHAT topics.

I love AIBU, a bit of brutal discussion is sorely needed at least once a week. Don't take away my joy!!!

I quite like AIBU, people don't feel the need to tiptoe around each others feelings for fear of upsetting each other. If a poster asks for other people's opinions, they can't be too upset when they get those opinions.

Quite a lot of the time though, people do just use it who are up for a argument, regardless of what their actual views are.

This is what we need

there should be an

'I'm a nasty mean bastard thread'

where they can spout to their hearts content

It does seem to be a vehicle for some to be down right nasty eg: get over yourself etc etc

But then some of the things do make me roar wirh laughter!

Nowt wrong with AIBU. I like it as you can strip away all that tedious 'supportive' stuff where you're meant to be nice to people who talk utter pish.

The only posters I do feel sorry for are those who haven't been around here for long and don't realise that they will be disagreed with repeatedly if they ask AIBU.

Also, if a poster concedes that they are BU then there's no further need to add YABUs after their post.

I love AIBU! It's pretty much the only section I visit on MN!

tbh i think working mums/sahm and nursery threads are much more unreasonable and personal.as someone always rocks up and shouts "well shouldnt have had children then,if you let strangers/wolves/reprobates" watch them. and lets not forget the feeding debacles they always get personal and humphy

and well,some posters post inane dribble on aibu and then get humphy if challenged - and it cuts both ways this isnt necessarily the mn posse harranging poor wee poster

some aibu posts are wholly unreasonable eg dribble about benefits,rants about weddings and the ubitiqious MIL posts

and i love the aibu ones who personally thank in bold the affirmative posts and then decry those who disagree

it's a bit of a simplistic analysis though, the idea that the alternative to downright uncalled-for nastiness is fluffy bunnies.

Oh me too Skihorse, thats good lively debate and will happen when the conversation really flows. I think there is a difference between that, and the scathing type of post where you think 'ouch'. Although they can be well placed too, just not in certain cases where the op wanted opinions, not whipping. Some mardy posts can almost stop the debate deas - or re route it completely.

Oh I've talked myself into a right jolly hole. I guess my point was 'play nicely'. I'm Libran. I crave balance. And a personal spell check facility.

I'm as guilty as anyone of not arguing in a rational sensible way when I get peeved - I just can't help but fly off the handle when someone says "therefore you must be hairy or stupid or both and my friend cuntymum says so too". -- which leads me to junglist, when you fight back you're labelled rude and aggressive. In addition, if you ignore you're labelled lofty and up yourself!

Goblindt I agree with you too that for some it's all about the posturing - almost as though they're travelling in packs.

YANBU those people are cowards, ripping people apart while hiding behind a screen. Really sad. A bit of respect goes a long way. And the biggest joke of all is when you give shit back you're too aggressive.

I think in some cases a bunfight is all that is meant, all that is warrented. The nature of the op can set the tone iyswim? AIBU to put 'reserved' bunting up in my fav parent and child parking spot even though dd1 is 19 and lives abroad....

In other cases someone wants to discuss and reflect and gain insight and other pov. In these cases a grumpy polarised post can be really poor, as it takes the debate down a few notches.

Thats not to say people shouldn't be really fired up and in opposition to a pov, but that arguments put in a sensible way are more helpful. Surely.

Wannabee
I agree, good post.

I got a right flaming not long after I started MNetting and it did put me off for a while. It upset me enough to stop me posting for a couple of months before I got sucked back in.

Sometimes the nasty post is more to be cool and show off to the others than anything else, I feel.

YANBU

Some people do use AIBU as a green light, unfortunately that then follows with them to other topics and threads, which is even worse.

tbh mamag....in two years of posting on here...(and involved in countless fights/arguments)...only 2 or 3 posters have been so unnecessarily rude that what they said got to me.....i just avoid them now.

they have the problem...not me.

Horrendous bullying - really???

Don't see it myself - and I was accused of being a selfish mum who doesn't love my daughter because I was considering going away for her birthday.

I didn' feel abused or bullied - just more justified since those who thought I was a bitch were so clearly nuts

no...don't think it should be watered down..

aibu makes a man out of you...