I’ve just come back off holiday. By coincidence, an old friend, Beth, was in the same resort at the same time. We’re not close - I haven’t seen her in person for about ten years - but we keep in touch on Facebook. So it seemed natural to meet up with her and her friend Jo while I was there.
Now, Beth is also friends with Mel, an ex-friend of mine. Mel and I were once very close, but we had a spectacular and permanent falling out. The only time Beth has referenced this is when she passed on a happy birthday message. I said I was sorry she’d been dragged into it and told her she shouldn’t feel she had to pass on messages. That was that.
Anyway, when I had a drink with Beth and Jo, Beth asked if there was any chance of me and Mel making things up. I said absolutely not; too much has happened and the friendship is beyond repair. I thought I was probably going to have to give Jo a basic explanation, but before I could, she said, “Oh, you’re THAT Spamela! Oh yes, Mel’s been really upset about your falling out. She’d love to make it up.”
I felt awkward, as I would have chanced changed the subject earlier had I known Jo knew her too. I reiterated that it was over. Jo started the whole “Oh, I’m sure you could sort it out; she just wants a chance to explain” routine. I shut it down and changed the subject, and made my excuses not long afterwards.
Anyway, it seems Jo has found me on social media and has been speaking to Mel, as Jo has messaged me saying Mel would really love the chance to explain, it all got out of hand etc., and couldn’t I just have one conversation with her? I was pretty annoyed, TBH. I have no idea why Jo would insert herself in this situation. Part of me wants to simply ignore the message, but I don’t want to give her an excuse to try again.
What do you think of this response? Does it toe the right line between friendly and firm?
“Hi Jo - I hope you enjoyed your holiday. You are kind to be concerned about your friend, but as I said on holiday, there is no going back for me and Mel and I don’t want to discuss it any further. Take care.”