Would you help in these circumstances

Maybe he has realised he should have paid for the service that was received years ago.

I am amazed that many are debating a loan when they received something for free. Perhaps the person should have put an invoice together for services provided and payment is now required... With interest.

Maybe them the OP and DH will do the right thing. Pay and not be free loaders

It’s not dickish to charge interest…the money is depreciating in value over time, 5k today vs 5k in 3 years is very different. A loan between friends should include an element of interest IF it is going to be over a number of years. You don’t have to make a profit on it, but you do need the value of the money you have at the end to be equitable, change them at the rate of inflation, it’ll be far lower than the bank would charge, and your money retains its value. Otherwise you are subsidising them.

I am usually firmly in the no lending category, however, in this instance it is clear the decision has been made, and I think it was a good idea to ask on here because then you get a real feel for whether your decision is right. If you had seen people saying no and thought their points were really valid then it could make you realise you don’t want to lend, if you found yourself arguing against them then you know you are very comfortable in your decision to lend.

Just get an agreement drawn up and make sure there is a standing order, you don’t need to be having to ask her about payments, that’s the sure fire way to create tension in the friendship

I think I was the latter

OP, can you at least give as a hint as to what the money saving favour was? I don't want to pry, but I am actually a little confused and if you clarified, it would help me answer. Someone upthread suggested legal advice, which I would think would be very helpful and actually equivalent to having given money.

Your DP is being ridiculous IMO. The friend didn't lend or give them money. That said, if the friend is for example a high powered lawyer who gave them free advice, that might be more almost equvialent to having given money. I've asked OP to clarify,

What sort of friend asks to borrow money for a nice-to-have item? If they can afford to pay you back, they can afford to take out a proper loan with a bank. No. Friends are not banks.

Never discuss money with friends or family. By all means share information but your money is your money.

Had your friend taken her own advice she could have been better off financially surely?

Did she give you the advice seemingly with strings attached intentionally?

Do you have a plan for non-payment - the friendship will suffer from both sides.

Your polling is not clear. So I voted yabu. No I would not lend a significant some of money to be paid over a long period of time.
Can I ask how much and what period of time?
What if you need it?

Agree with this. You said it was a loan amounting to less than the amount you saved, which you said was several thousand. So it's not a large sum to borrow from a bank.

It's very hard to give the best advice without knowing the amounts involved, the type of advice given and purpose of the money now. If it's not a crazy amount of money and she gave you advice based on professional expenses and expertise that would benefit you in the future I would be tempted to gift her back half what you saved and not ask for it to be repaid in cash. But for her to give you future professional advice kind of like a labour exchange. This seems more on line with friendship. However you're obviously considerably richer than me so this is a very theoretical idea

I doubt your friend was setting you up but wonder whether she thinks that because she did you a favour
it's ok to ask you for one.

In other words , do you think she'd ask you for money if she hadnt given you advice that saved you money?

I had a friend I thought was family and had integrity. Turns out they didn't. The debt ate at them and they manufactured an excuse to break contact. Still think hi wife should have kicked him out. So now I have no friends and am out the money. Lose - lose situation so keep your money.

Yep. Anyone who is paying attention learns that reality does not align with hoping for the best in people's behaviour, and learns to protect themselves.

People who choose not to do that are either lucky, or a glutton for punishment.

No.

And if they expect it because they did you a favour that's a massive red flag that they were setting you up for a long con.

Honestly, if you want to do it, and DH is happy about it too, get a loan with repayment terms and conditions written up by a solicitor and witnessed by a notary. She is probably absolutely fine about paying you back, but this adds a layer of protection.

My concern would be that they see how they saved you money so in a weird way if they dont pay you back you haven’t lost out. Don’t lend it.

Never loan money you aren't okay with never getting back. Like if you do it's a pleasant surprise, but if you don't you can still carry on with no impact on your life or finances. With that in mind, consider how much you CAN lend but definitely not the entire thing, then set up an IOU with payment terms and have them sign and date it. Be sure to communicate that the future of your relationship is on the line because this is a trust issue. Then see what happens.

If you are not in a financial position to lose the money you loan out to people, then say no. I loaned a friend $50 in 1995 and never heard from her again. So I figure it cost me $50 to get rid of a fool which is a pittance of what i would have spent on gifts and treats had we stayed "friends". Sometimes it's a good way to test who is true and who is not.

Girl, it makes perfect grammatical sense. Not my fault you decided to attack me with poor grammar. HTH

I think it depends on your friend and how reliable she is—but also what the money is for. I believe you said your husband is okay with it (but I'd insist on discussing it fully before agreeing anything). You've helped one another in the past (though not with loans of this amount). You wouldn't be in financial ruin if you never got the money back or it took longer than planned.

If you trust her, which it sounds like you do, I'd get it down in writing and go ahead with it.

I used to think that.

How much is she asking for, why can't she get a loan or borrow from her family,

What is her credit history. Does she have secure income? Does she really have no savings of her own.

On balance if your partner had said no, if say unless it's an absolutely desperate situation.

If you do , only lend what to you can afford to lose. Maybe not the whole sum but part, and get amount and repayable schedule recorded win writing ?