Selling inherited house when sibling living in it

And have no inheritance either

if she had been put in a carehome there would be no house to sell .

And sister would have had to move out then.

She had pretty much a free home for years

@Alittlewordinyourear I agree that their Mum should have discussed the situation properly with the Dsis but given that she's only ever paid a small amount of housekeeping over her entire working life, perhaps her Mum assumed that her DD had considerable savings and if she wished to, would be able to buy out her siblings?

It really is a shame that it wasn't properly discussed years ago but there we are.

The sister cannot be left homeless and you must realise that it may not be easy for her to find somewhere she could move to. You need a realistic idea of what she could afford, including what mortgage she might get - not sure if anyone has assessed this. And bear in mind flats can have high service charges, difficult for someone on a limited income.
In all fairness this needs to be sorted before you can really make a fair decision on how to divide the estate - your sibling is probably right that your sister may need 50% (at least). If you love her as you say bear in mind that she has saved you all a huge sum by caring for your mum and this should be recognised.

She gets the same as the others despite being a carer for five years- if she had been put in a carehome there would be no house to sell . I think the OP sounds heartless forcing her out, she could give her more time and not sound so patronising talking about a one bed flat

your sister can't afford to run the house, it is beyond her means. Sadly it is her home and she doesn't want it to be sold. The reality is it must be sold regardless of how you eventually decide to split your share of the inheritance

could you write her a letter outlining that you do understand it is her home but realistically its to much for her to pay the upkeep and it will need to be sold and you could buy somewhere cheaper for her to live - that you can do that together and take her through the process

But that didn’t happen, the house wasn’t swallowed.

Who do you think should pay the maintenance and running costs on the home?

Why would you think that someone who has successfully married, had three children and works full time and runs her own home and life be spoiled as a child? If anyone in this scenario was spoiled by their parents it isn’t the OP who has stood on her own two feet. And the OP isn’t the one who doesn’t want to share.

I don’t see why the sister didn’t pay rent for the thirty years she wasn’t caring for her mother. Now she seems to think it’s reasonable to get a two hundred and eighty thousand pound inheritance, so sixty grand a year for her caring duties.

Or maybe the DM recognised she has already given a significant amount more to one child than the other two over the years and wanted to ensure they all had equal inheritance.

This happened to a good friend of mine, her brother went back to live at home with Mum & Dad after suffering a bad experience, and ended up staying there until both parents died. My friend had warned him that the house would have to be sold when their parents died, as it was to be left to the two of them and their sister. Of course, come the time the brother didn't want to move out, but the sisters and their husbands, all just kept going round to the house, each time telling him that they would be putting the house on the market, and then asked him if he needed any help finding somewhere to live. In the end, he bought a one bed flat, and to everyone's surprise settled in remarkably quickly, and is now very proud of having his 'OWN' home.

So my thoughts are, have you asked your sister what her plans are? Have you been clear that she will have to move out, and finally have you offered to help her find somewhere to rent or buy, as she's bound to be feeling entirely out of her depth right now, and the worry of having to find somewhere to live, so that you and your sibling can get what's due to you, while she's still presumably drowning in grief, must be absolutely terrifying for her.

She cannot afford to pay for the upkeep of the house, nor can the OP of the other sibling.

The sister has been living at the house rent free and working. If she’s in her fifties, she’s been working for thirty years, so could have easily saved alot if money over the years, especially the mum paid for all the food, bills etc. Even as little as £300 a month is £3600 over a year, or £90000+ over thirty years.

She could have paid rent for the years she wasn’t caring

Why would op have had to pay for her mums care? That isn't how it works, mums savings first then the LA pays. Unless she goes into a home and then the house would have been sold.

You do know that if your sister hadn't cared for your mother care home fees may have swallowed up the house?
Caring fir someone is a stressful job in itself. Why should she have paid rent?
Show your sister some compassion.
Were you spoilt as a child?

She has made provision, she gets a third. Executor is different to beneficiaries.OP as the executor is the one who has to legally carry out the terms of the will

I think you're being a bit unfair here. She was her carer for FIVE YEARS which is no small feat - and saved you all thousands - and it sounds like she had very little meaningful help from either of you. If your DB wants to give 50% and you want to do 40%, is it really worth falling out with the whole family over the £14k you personally would lose? (Based on splitting the 10% difference between you and DB at house value of £280k).
The fairest thing would be to say that you want to agree to put the house on the market after Christmas - as you're never going to sell it before then anyway and she's facing her first Christmas alone without your mum so really doesn't need the added stress - and that you and DB would like to give her 50% as appreciation for her doing the lion's share of the care of your mum.

You sound way too matter-of-fact about it (and I say that as quite a direct person myself!) and honestly a bit greedy, when she's probably finding the grief much harder than you, having been so close to your mum. Of course she shouldn't immediately have to worry about losing her home as well. Also, the continued use of "small flat" comes across as really patronising - it's not up to you what she buys!

One option that would suit some.
If the sister who is living there can afford the cost of maintaining the house and getting it in good repair, let her live there till she dies.
The house could then be sold and all money paid out fairly to you and your siblings' children....a lovely windfall for them when the time comes.
The sister/carer has no children, so her benefit would be living in the property till she dies.

Pretty harsh of your mother not making provision for the child who lived with her and looked after her. Your sister must be traumatised, losing her mother, after living with her and then finding herself and all her memories turfed out on to the street. Why did she not name three executors ?

The sibling living their can pay for the bills and basic maintenance, she still works and claims benefits

Id say give more time. But give a date as others have suggested. Ie "I will be pushing forward ftom this date (ie Jamuary/February) with a sale, this will give us all space to grieve and move forward and get our affairs in order.
Im assuming you will be happy for DSis to have the furniture etc. And then maybe if she is willing to work with you add in.

If you are willing to cooperate well split the proceeds 40/30/30 in her favour that way you are only loosing a little (you and DB loose about 8k each she gains 16k ) but also seeming like you are willing to help her. She would walk away with over £110,000 which is a nice chunk to put down on her own place.
I think giving her 50 is way too much and very unfair.

How long was she DM’s carer for? Had she not lived in it…it would have been sold to pay for DM’s residency in a care home. This has not been taken into account. I guess your mother was in a cleft stick OP, not wanting to show favouritism to any of her DC but I doubt she expected her live-in daughter and carer to be evicted from her home pretty much as soon as she died, if at all.

Think about this, op 👆

Who’s going to pay to maintain the house in OP’s situation?

I am in the same position where my sister cared for the remaining parent. Parents will states an equal 3 way split. Two siblings have own houses, yet the sibling remaining in the house is on benefits. We all decided she can stay in the house as long as she wants, we don't want rent either. No ones pensions are guaranteed as we may not even survive that long. Stop being a shitty person and let it go. Just live thinking the house doesn't exist.. You have a house and a job! Stop being greedy