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To expect people ill with Covid stay home?

794 replies

LakelandHiker · 12/10/2026 18:09

This week, my manager and a friend who goes to my exercise class are ill with Covid. I don't know if they've tested, but they've both said they have it. However one is still coming into the office and the other still attending the exercise class. AIBU or overreacting here... but why don't they stay home until clear? Even if 'feeling 95% better' wouldn't you wait until potentially exposing others? I can't help but feel mad at them both for being so selfish. I often look after an elderly relative and can't risk passing Covid on to her as she is frail. I get life can't be on pause forever but my manager can get paid sick leave and my friend can miss a class, it isn't like there's anything at stake...

OP posts:
Delatron · 14/10/2026 11:52

Calliopespa · 14/10/2026 10:41

Yes, there is a selfishness aspect, but also a policy aspect as far as workplaces are concerned.

I know and that is where it also needs to change. So employers need to have a look at their sickness policy and think of the greater good. Won’t happen I guess.

I have huge sympathy for those with strict workplace sickness policies who can’t take much time off when sick.

For me, I am more talking about those that could WFH but choose not to.

Or those that go to the gym/exercise classes when it wouldn’t kill then to miss a class. Or those that choose to visit relatives with illness when it would be so easy to reschedule.

Personally now for me - because I have experience with long Covid and know what damage Covid does - I just want that knowledge so I can choose to avoid sick people where possible. So if a friend has a cold and I’m
sharing a car - give me a heads up as I’m aware sharing a confined space with no air is a huge transmission risk.
whereas a large space is not. So I won’t share the car.

If I have visitors - tell me you’re ill and we’ll reschedule because again being in close contact is a high transmission risk.

Pir · 14/10/2026 11:43

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 11:18

Well firstly you would have a conversation and explain. Secondly its not EVERY time - its if you or they are ill. Or you could meet outside, make sure ventilation is suitable. Its about education - the more we normalise it the better. No one says it will be perfect EVERY time but doing nothing changes nothing. If you hospitalised a client due to your infection would you care? If a client asks you to mask would you?

This makes sense.

ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 11:34

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ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 11:22

LakieLady · 14/10/2026 10:28

But £75 is all some people have to live on after paying rent etc.

Pre-retirement, I used to do some financial capability work with clients as well as welfare rights, and it was a real heart sinking moment when I came across clients who were really struggling and would still find it hard if they fed their families on nothing but economy beans on economy toast. One single parent was left with about £50pw after paying rent, council tax, utility bills etc.

I get that but it’s still someone’s health and life at the end of the day. There’s no price can be put on that.

Surely most people couldn’t voluntarily bring themselves to kill someone for the sake of £75 independent of how much they have or don’t have. It’s conceptually the same situation, the action (knowingly spreading germs to vulnerable parties) just different and I think that difference disconnects people and makes it feel “less real”.

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 11:20

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:14

@mumatlast14
So teachers should wear masks now?
And you won't send your child to school with a cold?

If ill then yes.

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 11:18

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:10

@mumatlast14 OK. So how would these YP respond to an authority figure coming into their home wearing a mask covering do you suppose?

Well firstly you would have a conversation and explain. Secondly its not EVERY time - its if you or they are ill. Or you could meet outside, make sure ventilation is suitable. Its about education - the more we normalise it the better. No one says it will be perfect EVERY time but doing nothing changes nothing. If you hospitalised a client due to your infection would you care? If a client asks you to mask would you?

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:17

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:10

@mumatlast14 OK. So how would these YP respond to an authority figure coming into their home wearing a mask covering do you suppose?

Have you answered this?

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:14

@mumatlast14
So teachers should wear masks now?
And you won't send your child to school with a cold?

vodkaredbullgirl · 14/10/2026 11:13

We been told to wear masks if we have a cold. I've booked my flu and covid jab for next week.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:12

@ExpectMore Says the woman who has "help" for her own children when taking 6 weeks off work!!! 😄
I will continue to be "greedy" and work in order to pay my rent
Get back to your kids, maybe?

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 11:12

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:04

@mumatlast14 What experience do you have of working with children with significant SEND needs? If you did you would understand re mask wearing but please see the other poster's detailed response for clarification.
Government guidance at the height of Covid ruled out mask-wearing for teachers, and that was in mainstream settings!!!

Edited

In response to your edited comment re gov guidance and schools - they didn't have all the facts then. We now know the damage covid causes. See Long Covid Kids for full details. But yeah, let's just continue to disable our young people and increase our benefits cost/demand as those young people grow into adults too ill to work.

ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 11:11

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FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:10

@mumatlast14 OK. So how would these YP respond to an authority figure coming into their home wearing a mask covering do you suppose?

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 11:08

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:04

@mumatlast14 What experience do you have of working with children with significant SEND needs? If you did you would understand re mask wearing but please see the other poster's detailed response for clarification.
Government guidance at the height of Covid ruled out mask-wearing for teachers, and that was in mainstream settings!!!

Edited

Plenty. What experience do you have with working with clinically vulnerable and those suffering long covid? If you did you'd realise its important to find ways to protect everyone's health by using a variety of tools to do so.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:07

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ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 11:05

LuLightFest · 14/10/2026 09:03

Reading the thread is stalking now? Did you forget your comment. You work with SEN children. SEN and ND children can be difficult enough to deal with without being unwell, I would know!

I’m sure it’s nice for them and their families to get ill for a week so you don’t lose out on a bit of money. I’d never knowingly enter someone’s home and make a whole family sick. It’s morally wrong.

This

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 11:04

@mumatlast14 What experience do you have of working with children with significant SEND needs? If you did you would understand re mask wearing but please see the other poster's detailed response for clarification.
Government guidance at the height of Covid ruled out mask-wearing for teachers, and that was in mainstream settings!!!

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 10:58

BuildbyNumbere · 14/10/2026 08:12

Reading this while listening to someone cough their guts up on the train … if only.

Keep an FFP3 in your bag and then you can pop it on and reduce your risk of infection.

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 10:54

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 10:47

@Pumpkindice Absolutely agree - and this is why mask use wouldn't be advisable for professionals working with the young people we do.

Why? Doesn't their health matter?

Tryonemoretime · 14/10/2026 10:53

Delatron · 14/10/2026 08:46

Are people just ignoring how many on this thread have Long Covid? Does that not worry any of you? Or you just assume it won’t happen to you.

I was super healthy, running 30 miles a week. Never ill.

I'm so sorry that you, and so many others, have Long Covid. Like cf / me it's like a secret illness no-one talks about. There are so many suffering from it. No wonder the numbers of jobless has risen. But can I give you some encouragement? I had a mild attack of Covid in January 2021, seemed briefly to recover, then Long Covid hit me like a tram. Amongst other things it affected, I managed to watch one of our daughters get married, but was too ill to attend most of the reception. Our milestone wedding anniversary celebration was also not what it should have been. BUT 5 and a half years later, I'm almost back to normal and praise God for it. I really hope you recover, too. 🙏

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 10:52

Pumpkindice · 14/10/2026 10:30

That's the point I'm making. It was our neighbouring authority that made 'Awaab's law'

after a child died as a direct result of damp and mould in their homes, a lot of families are affected by poor nutrition due to low incomes, as well as other issues like parental mental ill health, drug use, crime and anti social behaviour affecting quality of life. Our employer has sold off many of our previous office buildings due to funding cuts, so the idea that we can get air filtration systems by being a bit assertive in supervision or to start role modelling to families wearing masks when they can't afford to put the heating on just sounds laughable, sorry.

We do try and promote health, follow good hygiene etc but it has to be at a realistic level. Our employer will let us work from home where we can, and we try our best to avoid visiting medically vulnerable people when ill unless it's an emergency, but we can't stay off/at home for the full duration of minor illness, it isn't realistic.

Its a shame you want to dismiss it with language like 'laughable'. I guess mould & damp was 'laughable' until it wasn't. Covid isnt 'minor. FFP3 Mask wearing should be mandatory if visiting clinically vulnerable while sick. Cause & effect - reduce exposure to infections will reduce infections. These people deserve protection from further health problems which will only exacerbate their current situation if it means they cant work or end up with long term health conditions.

KindCroc · 14/10/2026 10:50

HappyLizard23 · 12/10/2026 18:23

You happy to pay my wages then? I don’t get paid to be off sick so I’m sure as hell not missing work for Covid anymore.

If you have to go out then you have to. I think the issue is with people going out and risking infecting others if it’s not essential.

If people are ill, and HAVE to go to work, then there’s always an option on a well-fitting FFP3 - which have been proven to substantially lower infection risks. (The blue ones do nothing because it’s airborne and there are huge gaps at the sides).

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 10:47

@Pumpkindice Absolutely agree - and this is why mask use wouldn't be advisable for professionals working with the young people we do.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 10:43

@ExpectMore Eurgh don't call me Mrs anything!!
You don't like teachers?!
Ah now there's a surprise!!

Calliopespa · 14/10/2026 10:41

Delatron · 14/10/2026 10:26

Yep. And drag yourself in to work and snot over everyone.

A little shift to being less selfish where possible would be good.

Yes, there is a selfishness aspect, but also a policy aspect as far as workplaces are concerned.