To send ds2 to a different school to ds1

It is reasonable to want DS2 not to be seen as DS1s younger brother (or vice versa) and have the comparison made. I'm not sure you've made sufficient a case for separate schools though.

If we are talking ordinary sibling romping and squabbling then I think you are massively overthinking this issue. It won't be the first time the teachers will have had to deal with siblings at the same school! They'll surely be used to it. In my experience young children generally have finely tuned antennae re what behaviour they can get away with with different people. They will quickly realise that they have to behave differently at school.

It did to me at first as I’m not sure I was that type of kid myself (certainly wouldn’t have been wrestling etc 🤣 and was much less physical than my kids in general). I did used to feel like all my senses had been assaulted after pick ups. Now, however, I’m used to it and just leave them to it. I think it’s great to have siblings to go a bit mad with.

At my kids’ school let out, it’s like a pack of wild animals have been released from small cages. They all run out and start shouting, climbing things, wrestling each other, running in every direction, rolling on the floor etc. I absolutely love it. The yard is safe and there’s a small window of life where this behaviour is appropriate and doesn’t get you locked up 🤣 My kids get completely stuck in and it doesn’t worry me at all. I wouldn’t consider needing to send them to separate schools!

Completely understand. Although I work in secondary school family dynamics can be a nightmare to manage. I don’t see a problem with different primary schools if you can manage the logistics. Once they have their own sets of friends they should be established enough to cope with the same secondary a year apart where there’s no class mixing between year groups…

I liked the mixed classes. The children socialised more, and they were given work more suited to their abilities rather than just their age.

*Edited as just caught up with your update. That really is mixed! A much bigger age spread than at DS school, where mixing was a choice not a necessity.

Are yoy saying your son's school have recpetion children, year 1 and year 2 together?

It sounds like they're struggling with falling numbers, as all 3 of those year groups together really isn't in the best interests of the children, or staff.

What are the other schools like in the area? You say they're small, but how small?

I wouldn't really like siblings in class together, however it is presumably common in this school. Presumably this is the 'best' school for your family - by best I mean closest etc which is why you chose it, not necessarily objectively better. Therefore I'd worry I'd feel guilty of DS2's school ended up not as good.

I would definitely look at other schools and move them both if possible.

I can't see how just turned 4 year olds can learn through continuous provision whilst 7 year olds are simultaneously trying to write paragraphs about the great fire of London is an environment that suits all the children equally.

Have a really good look round other schools. Don't compromise your son's education for the sake of separating them but if you find a really good alternative where you think he will thrive, then why not?

It does seem a bit of a sledgehammer solution if I am honest, but one of my children has SEN and I am much happier for my other child's sake when they are in different schools. I do think setting things up so they are less likely to fall into a role of trouble maker is something worth considering. But you would be taking on a load of extra hassle and they still might end up making raucous friends.

Do not send your son to a school you are less happy for the sake of separating them though.

I wouldn't send them to different schools but equally the school that your eldest attends doesn't sound like the best school to suit both children.

Are reception really mixed in with kS1? That sounds like a recipe for disaster and not at all practical. In smaller schools they are normally left with nursery or a separate entity entirely due to the different curriculums.

Kids often behave much better at school when away from parents. And I'm sure in a school that small, the teachers are used to having siblings in the same class. They'll have their strategies for handling them. If their behaviour together really is a nightmare, then think about moving one of them to a different school, but I'd give it a good go first.

Because they'll get older, they'll have other friends, the teacher should have more control. They'll behave differently at school compared to after with you.

Is the school so small that there's only one class per year group? DS school had mixed classes but there were three. They made a point of splitting siblings and cousins into different classes. They also split DS and his best friend after group 1 but that's another story...... 🤣🤣🤣

I also agree with this

I thought you were going to be talking about secondary schools so I was going to say in come circumstances I totally agree with the reasons for different schools. Due to SEN with one of my children I have my children in different primary schools. It’s necessary for us but an absolute nightmare working around it. But your reason makes no sense at all. However I wouldn’t like mixed classes so I’d contemplate moving both to a school that didn’t have that.

Primary school? No I wouldnt send them to different schools just because they get a bit loud