Pure Cremation is body disposal right?

Cremation service rooms are not very attractive. They are very sterile and a bit weird to me. Burgundy velvet curtain type places.
then the coffin goes through a curtain. I find it pretty awful

many people prefer to have a service or funeral type affair somewhere nicer or more personal

the actual cremation takes place away from everyone anyway

This isn’t the case. As I said above, for my Mum it was quite literally a low key funeral - the coffin, music etc, just no speeches and crowds of people.

See, this is why I always find it odd that the dead person decides what happens after their death, when they are not the ones who experience it. The funeral is surely for the living to remember them/mourn them/say their goodbyes. Once someone is dead, why do they care what their funeral looks like? I think people should leave a sum of money (if they have it) to cover the costs of any funeral, and leave the decisions to the remaining family to decide whether they want a big funeral, a quiet celebration, or nothing at all. (Appreciate that wouldn't be practical if families can't agree...)

We did a direct cremation for my Mum. We got the ashes back and scattered them somewhere she loved. We / she didn’t want a funeral as it would have literally have been just 4 people.

This is what my mum wants and has already paid for. Her ashes are to be scattered along with dad’s somewhere that has a lot of memories for us as a family. She doesn’t want any fuss.

My Mum’s cremation was through Pure Cremation (her choice).

She had a coffin, we could choose what went in it with her, our immediate family went to their facility in the countryside Hampshire where my Mum’s coffin was placed in a room like a chapel. We could choose music to be played in the background. We spent about half an hour in the room and then we left. A few days later her ashes were delivered to us.

I am sure it can just be ‘body disposal’ if that’s what you wish but what we had was actually lovely and simple and what my Mum wanted - she didn’t want a big service and a fuss.

Personally I hate funerals so to me they make a lot of sense- you can also have a get together at the pub or a room and have speeches and pictures up if you want - I attended one like this and actually thought it was much nicer having a few speeches and some lovely pictures up on a pin board in the place it was held . Felt more like a low key social party -

We did direct cremation for my mother, but we had a church service on the same day. So service without the body being there, it was absolutely fine and a hell of a lot cheaper.

When my Dad died we had a small family witnessed cremation of just 20 close family . Cost just over £2,000 . We had a short ten minute service with pall bearers , we put flowers and a photo on the coffin, a family member said a short eulogy and poem , we had some music . It was all we needed to say goodbye. I think it’s important to say goodbye as it gives closure .

This is what I want. I don't have much family and hardly any who are younger than me and give a shit. This means I have no idea who would organise my funeral even if I wanted one so a pure cremation seems like the best solution. Better than a pawper's funeral. I don't really see the problem with it.If it's what people choose. If family and friends of the deceased want a service or a wake then all they need to do is organise that themselves, with or without ashes present.

I would be prefer to be buried. Ideally under a tree near a stream. But I don't think that will happen.

I’m pretty sure there was something on The One Show/Watchdog type thing about this and issues with misleading advertising.

Disposal of the body is exactly what I want. My husband (who incidentally will be 80 tomorrow) and I are both having direct cremation when we go (daughter has agreed) and when my mother died in 2019 we had a direct cremation for her. We didn't want her ashes, so they disposed of them. It was bad enough having her in my house when she was alive, so I certainly don't want her here now she's dead. There was no 'wake', service or gathering, nor will there be for my husband or me. Just disposal.

If you're being clinical about it, all cremation is "disposal". The only difference with direct cremation is there's no family in attendance.
We did direct cremation for my mother in law - she was very private and asked for no funeral in her will. The local funeral director was fabulous and treated us exactly the same as if we'd asked for a top drawer send off. Her ashes were returned shortly after and we have scattered them somewhere she loved, followed by a memorial gathering a few months after she died and were able to remember her fondly, rather than who she'd become through dementia. We'll also do the same for my dad when the time comes as he's fallen out with every member of his family so there's no point in having any find of funeral.

I plan to do this. It saves all the hoopla and then loved ones can have a memorial service as and if they want one.

Having organised my dad’s funeral a few years ago - finding readings, and a singer and choosing hymns, creating and having printed an order of service, arranging a priest and church, and a crematorium, picking an outfit for him, choosing flowers, coffins, hearses, cars, clothes, ferrying people about, booking a venue, ordering a buffet, letting people know, and at the same time trying to unpick his estate, cancel direct debits, sell his car, deal with my mum’s shock and distress, and all the while dealing with my own and my children’s sadness, was the hardest time in my life. This option would have been so welcome.

He was a man who hated a fuss and hated being the centre of attention, and he would definitely have chosen to ‘slip away’ had he had the choice. He also knew the value of a pound and would have appreciated the value element!!

yup. Burn em and bag em.
That's what I want. No faff, no fuss.

It's just a direct cremation. But tbh it's not that much cheaper than a basic funeral.

It's cheaper with a local independent funeral place

I’ve always thought it is a bit crazy to have to organise a funeral when you are at your most distressed. I like the idea of a ‘pure cremation’ followed by a memorial service of your own design at a time of your own choosing, as long as it aligns with the wishes of the deceased (and possibly their direct relatives - brothers and sisters).

We actually found the funerals of close relatives quite traumatic and would much rather have been able to remember them in a different way . I will talk to my DC about what they would rather do and plan accordingly . I agree though that Pure Cremation ads are misleading

THere is nothing at all to stop you having a memorial service and speeches and music
you just do not have a coffin or time deadline

you can either wait for the ashes to come back
or make the scattering of ashes a chance to visit favourite places with a purpose

No one is there when a body is cremated, so I don’t see it as much different if you don’t want the fuss / expense of a funeral. You commit the body for cremation at a service but it’s not happening as you are still in the crematorium. Unlike a burial where you are part of the process.

So, I can see why these are gaining popularity. Especially as a PP when a loved one has outlived a good number of friends and or family.

A friends father had one and then they had a family lunch where they all shared their memories / spoke etc and then scattered the ashes. It’s not for everyone but for those who wish it, I can see how it’s becoming more popular.

I think funerals are changing, much the same as weddings have evolved over the years now they aren’t limited to a church or registery offices. It feels like funerals are also changing how they happen. It might take longer for people to accept they aren’t always how they used to be.

It's known as a simple cremation and is unattended. The body is cremated either in a wooden or biodegradable coffin and the ashes are returned to you afterwards in a casket of your choice. Many funeral services now include this as an option. It is a very respectful process and apart from there being no service, everything is much the same as a traditional cremation, with personal attention from an undertaker & you are informed of the time and day of the cremation.

@HorseandHeron I feel the same way. I actually have fond memories of my parents’ funerals- they were celebratory occasions and I was as able to hear so much about them from people who had known them at different stages of their lives. It was healing and felt right. Funerals are really for the people left behind and grieving. The deceased person is at rest and knows nothing about any of it!

You get the ashes back later to as you wish at a memorial service

Same as if the body is donated to medical science - ashes are returned 6 months later

We did a direct cremation for my Dad via our local undertaker and it was a LOT cheaper than these companies. They called it an "unattended" cremation, they use the early morning slots at the local crem and the coffin still goes into the crem in the normal way in a hearse, they all bow their heads etc and the coffin is then trundled back. We had the ashes back 2 weeks later. They don't tell you when it's happening so family don't turn up to watch etc.

Dad died a very traumatic cancer death and we were simply too scarred for a public service. We did a beautiful service interring his ashes into his plot in our local church on a hot summers day and the vicar was lovely. I want exactly the same when my time comes.